2007-08-23 Show

And who plays?

What happens in America?

Well, we steamed your ass in World War II.

What do you have to do?

We never did.

And who helped you out just now?

You piss off, woman.

Don't talk to me like that.

We don't need you anyway, bitch.

Um, fuck you.

Call me a stinky, stinky fucker.

You are listening to the Madhouse Radio Podcast.

Yeah, taking big shits.

It's all about big shits tonight, everybody.

Madhouse Radio's back on the air.

Bitches, good evening, everybody.

We're here.

We're queer.

Deal with it.

madhouse radio madhouse live.com 98.6 the mouth.com it's not a joke check it out 98.6 the mouth.com

you'll see what it does i i dare you whores yeah as always with me as always hopefully with me as

always as always as always is the milkman milkman how you doing man what's up milkman good to have

you on glad that you made it man i am now yeah you sound great man good this actually sounds better

Better than having you on the computer, man.

No joke.

Yeah.

You sound good.

How are you doing, man?

Everything good?

Hanging in there?

Yeah, man.

It's pretty good.

The high is over 200 miles, so we can end 40 on our wind.

The bubble, we're about 80 minutes.

It's normalizing now.

That's good, man.

I'm glad things are getting back to normal there.

Milkman, for those of you who don't know, is in the Virgin Islands, and they were affected

by Hurricane Dean.

Not as much as some other parts are, like Mexico and Jamaica, but nonetheless, he was

is affected nonetheless, so he is not able

to join us here as he usually does. He's been out

of commission. For those of you who follow the

PCU Madhouse Live 98.6

The Mouth family,

I'm so tired of coming up with

different station names, and this is all a big

confusion with you all. Anyway, so

yeah, Milkman's okay. He's alright. He's

just internet less for the time being, but he's

going to be joining us still here on Madhouse Radio

as much as possible via TalkShoe,

so thank you TalkShoe.com.

What would we do without TalkShoe? We would have

have no milkman tonight. It'll be a very boring

show. Good to have you on, brother. And of course,

of course, of course, if you want

to join us here tonight, you can do so. You are

allowed to join us. If you want to call

in toll-free, the toll-free line will be open later.

And that line is

1-888-278-8509.

Again, the

toll-free line is

1-888-278-8509.

And I don't believe that's open now.

If it is, don't try to call, because we can't take

your call yet. Anyway,

regardless, visit

Visit MadHouseLive.com and subscribe to the podcast.

Check out the new newsletter, the old newsletter, that is.

Browse the MadHouse archives and much, much more.

That's over at MadHouseLive.com, and that's how you can stay in touch with us.

If you're using an instant messaging software out there,

you can reach us using Yahoo or AOL Instant Messenger tonight, Yahoo and AIM users.

Send a message to MadHouseRadio, MadHouseRadio on Yahoo and AIM.

And if you're using MSN Messenger, you can also hit us up at madhouseliveathotmail.com.

We are being broadcast to you on the newly reformed PCU radio, prankcallundergroundradio.com.

It's still alive, thanks to Dr. Lego and KDK and all those other kids.

Yes, Milkman, I decided to actually broadcast on PCU tonight.

I almost did not join PCU tonight.

I almost decided to refrain from associating myself with PCU tonight, but I decided at the last minute,

let's just go ahead and go into that.

And what else?

Yeah, 98.6emap.com and talk to you.

That's the Madhouse Radio Network.

Whoop-dee-freaking-doo.

All right.

I have no idea what you're saying, Milkman.

Keep grooving, though, man.

Keep grooving.

Hey, man, if you're looking for some fun,

I have a page at madhouselive.com on Newsletter.

That way you can keep going on with the push.

There we go.

Take her away.

All right, man.

And, of course, we have a special guest tonight,

none other than KDK joining us live tonight.

KDK, how are you doing, man?

I am bisexual.

I'm fabulous.

All right.

KDK is doing good, man.

man. Thanks for joining us tonight, man. Good to have you on.

Good to have KDK on here with us

tonight. He's doing fabulous.

That's awesome. The news

articles, I don't know. I don't watch the news

anymore. I don't listen to the news. Anything

happening, dude? What? There was a hurricane?

Did anybody die? Like, how bad

did Jamaica get hit? Did they riot there

or anything like that? They usually start a riot or something

like that. Anything like that happen? Actually, what I

got is that more people

killed blue shit. Really? And they actually

come to a park somewhere else.

Like, the eastern side. And it went to

to a player, and they didn't really have much damage.

So a pretty lucky thing, it was a 150-plus-mile-an-hour win.

That was a beast of a storm.

Is it back in the Gulf now?

Is it going to hit Texas, or did it just kind of dissipate over Mexico?

What happened with it?

I don't know if it's going to hit Texas.

I hope it goes straight for Dallas.

Very nice.

Okay, I guess you're not a Houston or a Dallas.

Is there a football team in Houston now?

What are they, Texans, the Houston Texans?

Of course, yes, in the Dallas Cowboys.

I don't know.

I almost said the Oilers.

I know the Oilers haven't been around for like 10 years now,

so I don't know where they got that from.

It's all about the Colts, man.

Yeah, that's true.

It's all about the Colts.

Yeah, right, okay.

Anyway, so yeah, like I said, we're going to do a show tonight.

We're going to try to do prank calls,

and we're going to try to do other stuff here.

Other than that, like I said, nothing really to talk about.

I know the Miners, did they give up on the Miners yet, Milkman?

Do you know at all?

Are they still in their hole?

We've been following that story for, like, two weeks, two, three weeks now.

Any news on the miners at all?

Basically, as far as I know, they haven't been able to recover anybody.

And just sand, little sand shovels.

Sand shovels now, huh?

Yeah, like they use at the beach, you know, like if you're going to build a sandcastle.

Right, right.

Something else is really getting any further.

Wow, man.

Well, if you're a miner, you expect something like that to happen.

I mean, you know, it comes with the territory.

If you're a cop, you expect to get shot at some point.

If you're a Marine, you expect to get, I don't know, killed or something.

I don't know.

Nothing nice to say about things like that.

Anyway, so, yeah.

That's rough.

Hard.

Our mining hats are off to the miners, man.

Right on.

Okay, well, I think we should, I would say let's jump into the prank calls.

I don't have any numbers to prank call tonight, man.

We don't have any numbers.

No one has sent in.

Actually, I think Poop has sent in numbers, but you know how those go.

Yeah, well.

Well, we have nothing else.

We might as well.

When you fish through all the debts, you might get one or two good ones.

So, Boop, I hope your record improves.

Well, he'll do okay.

He's sending Jose Ayala, who he always calls.

He always wants to call.

Marianne Tampon, we tried to call her last show, and that didn't really work out.

What else we got here?

Pam Colton.

Her friend Sabrina was talking shit about her.

She lives in Florida here, close to town.

Right, that's really close to here.

I kind of feel scared about calling Oviedo, Florida.

I used to live in Oviedo, as a matter of fact.

My first apartment, first place I ever lived at outside of my parents' house was in Oviedo with Big Andy.

Big Andy and me and some other white guy lived there in some apartment.

We've got Nipsey Jackson, a black man.

That's a weird name.

I've heard of Nipsey Russell.

Now there's a Nipsey Jackson here as a black man.

Somebody has to write that famous name.

I think I'll name my son Nipsey.

Nipsey.

Nipsey the fan of gypsies

Nipsey

we do have numbers from Lonesome Loser

Lonesome Loser checking in in the mouth

what's up

I'm completely out of touch here

and maybe you can give me a scoop

on the IRC chat room

or how I can join in the program

yes yes yes of course

the chat room we did regroup

there is a chat room available

if you go to madhouselive.com

the instructions are all there

There is a Java client up there as well.

If not, go.

I don't know if KDK put up the information on the PCURadio.com site.

I sent them the link, and I sent them the code for the Java client to do that.

I don't know if he was able to do that or not, but it is out there.

Regardless, if you want to join us here, the channel is PoundPCU,

and the chat room is over at MadHouseLive.com or MadHouseLive.com forward slash chat,

or just go to the main chat page for MadHouseLive.com, the main home page, that is.

And you can see it there.

Also, the podcast will be updated tonight after the show with four brand new episodes.

They have been edited.

They have been filtered.

They are nice and sexy.

I finished those last night.

I didn't have a chance to upload them last night.

I will upload them at the end of the show tonight.

Four episodes of Madhouse Radio will be added to the rotation on MadhouseLive.com

as well as a podcast for your listening leisure.

That will make a lot of our listeners happy.

Yeah, they got used to getting those episodes weekly when I was able to stay on top of it.

But my current work situation doesn't let me do that.

But that ends tomorrow is the last day.

Oh, yeah, that also reminds me.

Bad news here.

We're going to have to start the show at 11 p.m. for the foreseeable future, starting with next week's show.

And that means probably 11.30 p.m.

The good news is I can go on until 1, 2 o'clock in the morning Eastern Standard Time, so that's good.

But no more 10 p.m. Eastern Standard Time Madhouse start times for quite a while, unless I find a new job sometime soon.

So get used to that.

The new start time for Madhouse for the foreseeable future will be now.

I do have the ability.

I can change the show to Friday night.

instead of Thursday night, we could do a 10 p.m. Friday night show.

We would be going up against Zolar.

I don't know how that would work, but we could, in theory, do that.

We could start doing that immediately, as a matter of fact.

So what do you guys think?

If you guys want to hear Madhouse Radio on Friday night instead of Thursday night,

if that would work, whatever you – give us your suggestions.

Let us know.

Drop us a line at –

As a fallback position, if we do run into technical difficulties on Thursday,

we could just maybe take it up on a Friday.

That's right.

If we end up not being able to make it for some Thursday,

there's a great possibility of why it wouldn't be for Friday.

Yes, sir.

Tourette's guy, a.k.a. Poop, says,

I should name my son Danny after the Tourette's guy.

Yeah, poor guy.

Poor, poor fucking guy, Tourette's guy.

I really think he was an actor, but maybe he really died.

Whatever.

Lonesome Loser, as I said, has sent in numbers.

He's under the moniker of the A-Team tonight,

And I, continuing his normal 80s theme, we've got the cocky cactus, the cocky bull,

the freak factory, the Juan Carlos peon painting, or whatever that is.

Turd toters pumping in portable toilets.

That's really fun to say.

Turd toters pumping in portable toilets.

Maybe you could have a comment on that.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we've got Elegantly Funky, we've got Da Boy's Pizza, Da Boy's Pizza, Fat Burger.

We have a Fat Burger here in San Antonio, Texas.

We've got Pinky and Winky.

Oh, and you have to have Jack Masterson or Fat Albert on one call.

Fat Albert and Jack Masterson together on that one.

Pinky and Winky, we've got Camp Hee Haw, we have Ditsy Doodle, we have Jive Time Records,

and then we have from two weeks ago, we have the Yummy Korean Barbecue.

you all right good so we got a lot of a lot of options there tonight to do wonderful work there

everybody who is listening please please i implore you since we're kind of scattered here since the

our normal network was dissolved uh unceremoniously over the weekend um let whoever you know who likes

this show or listens to this show or any of the shows whether it be dr lego kdk or carlito or

sean ward not sean ward but whoever uh let them know where we're at man uh tell everybody to go

to pcuradio.com and update their browsers

and everything and make sure that they're listening

to us or madhouselab.com

we do have 26 listeners listening

live and that's live of course

and not including all our podcast

listeners who will be listening to this episode

sometime in the next two months

so there it is okay so

regardless we're going to do a prank call here oh yeah

and one last thing we are listening

to the newest Beastie Boys

album it is a completely instrumental

album they released in July

I forgot the title of it now

so I can't do that. That's stupid of me, but this is the new Beastie Boys album.

Milkman, do you like the Beastie Boys at all? I don't know if you do. I don't think you do.

Oh, yeah. I like the Beastie Boys.

Yeah, it's a really cool, mellow, relaxing album they released here. Something different.

I accept and I care that.

All right, cool. Cool. All right, buddies, here we go.

The first prank call of the night coming right up.

We're going to call the Fatburger. Why not?

Fatburger in San Antonio, Texas. One moment for the first prank of the night.

Just fine, how you doing?

So, so, so affected by this weather.

Oh yeah.

You guys, you guys, you guys got Coke or Pepsi products?

Pepsi, man.

We got Coke at the machine.

Oh, you don't have Pepsi?

I'm sorry, we do not.

We do have Cherry Coke.

So, Coke, Cherry Coke.

You got any Sprite?

We do have Sprite.

Alright.

What else you got?

Coke.

Thank you, Coke.

Let's have, uh...

You know what?

What's the strawberry drink?

What is that?

Is that some Fanta?

What do you got there?

Sorry?

What do you got, Fanta?

We got the Fanta strawberry.

Oh, nice. You know, my doctor says I can only have diet soda.

Oh, what does he know, huh?

Yeah, what does he know?

Yeah, you're not going to tell him, right? You don't know Dr. Nargis, do you?

Uh, no.

Dr. Nargis, you don't know Dr. Nargis?

Uh, no.

Yeah, so, you guys, you guys...

It's been a while. I'm 32 years old. It's been a while since I've talked to the doctor, actually.

Oh, you don't go to the doctor very much?

Not too much, no, sir.

I see the doctor once a week, man.

Ever since I got out of the service, man, this has been nightmare after nightmare.

I've heard you hear that.

I had a very bad time in the invasion of Panama.

You ever heard of that, man?

Yeah, I parachuted out of a helicopter and I landed on top of this cruise ship.

And this coke bottle went right through my vancouras, man.

And I got taken prisoner by these Panamanians and I surrendered to them.

Come to find out it was like this soccer team, man.

Fucking insane, man. Fucking insane.

You guys take to-go orders or what?

Yeah.

How long does it take you to stuff together a cheese and mayonnaise sandwich, man?

A cheese and mayonnaise sandwich.

Uh, fat burger?

Uh, just, you know, cheese and mayonnaise.

You got mayo and cheese there, right?

And I'm trying to watch my weight, so I'm just trying to get some cheese, mayonnaise,

some bacon grease, and, uh, and some...

You don't have sesame seeds on your buns, do you?

I mean, that's good, man.

I don't like that.

I don't like sesame seeds.

That's some...

I don't agree with sesame seeds.

What's the point, right?

It doesn't add nothing to it.

You just...

You shit it right out.

All right, put me down for two cheese, mayonnaise, and bacon-grilled sandwiches.

What do you recommend there to, what do you got there, fries to wash it down with, man?

Fries, so that's what it is.

You eat fried fries, all right.

All right, you guys got, you know, I might, am I going to be able to get a seat at this time?

I let you know I'm with a larger variety.

I weighed about 482 pounds last time I checked.

You know, you guys got a booth that probably wouldn't hold me.

You guys got any of those chairs there?

You know, just like one of the tables with the chairs.

You know, a chair.

We don't.

I just want to be normal, man.

I just want to eat my cheese and mayonnaise and bacon grease sandwich like a normal person.

That's all I'm asking for, brother.

Get these guys to go ahead and start working on it.

Like I said, we're about to close.

But I'll have them make it up if that's what you want.

Yeah, so cheese, mayonnaise, bacon grease on no sesame seed bun.

Let's go ahead and take a Diet Coke and mix it up with some Cherry Coke and a little spritz of Sprite.

Those drinks, you know, we'll give you the cup and you can make it as you go.

Oh, that's good.

I can make my own?

That's great, man.

You know how good it makes you feel that you guys are going to let me be independent?

You know, there's so much that a person of size can't do anymore.

I mean, that's why they got Sonics, you know what I'm saying?

Sonics, you can go over there and grab. They're crazy. They can make you a crazy dream.

They don't serve me at Sonics anymore.

They don't?

I got upset and I punched the machine where you take the orders because they refused me service.

I got trespassed.

Lucky for you, we don't have no machines. You can punch over here.

Yeah, well, I was. I was bringing in my own cups and stuff like that.

That was right when I got back from the service and everything.

I had a really bad time.

Then I thought, then I thought I saw, I saw Noriega, and I got that.

Feels off for me.

How soon can I, can I pick that up, man?

Five minutes now, but, uh, what, what, uh, do you want, how much would you want?

Is cheese, skin?

Just grease.

You know, just drizzle the grease on, on the top of the cheese, because it melts it.

It's beautiful.

Be there in about three minutes and 28 seconds, all right?

Uh, what was your name?

My name is Nick, sir.

What's yours?

My name is Jack.

Jack Masterson.

We're here.

I'll see you in three minutes and 12 seconds.

Yes, sir.

Fucking wheelchair, you fucking whore.

Wow, that was stupid.

I could have taken that different.

That wasn't that good.

I tried, though.

Didn't I, Milkman?

Yeah, Mario.

All right, man.

Good.

Is Milkman even there still?

No, Milkman's gone.

Look at that.

We lost the Milkman.

Milkman will be back shortly.

I'm sure you guys are waiting with bated breath for Milkman to return.

Saigon says that the Coke Zero Wikipedia says it's targeted for young males.

How do you target a soda for young males?

How do you target a drink to a specific segment of America?

It doesn't make any sense.

You drink what you want to drink.

It's targeted for young males who don't want to carry a soda that says diet

because they think diet is for women.

Well, hey, man, fuck you guys, all right?

I have no choice.

I like my diet soda.

So, yeah, here we continue with the show, continuing on,

continue continuing on our continuation.

We do have more numbers to do.

Hey, let me take a quick second here to turn on the toll-free line, everybody,

and the lines will be open for you to call us tonight.

We'll be right back in a second here, and we'll continue.

Okay, and the toll-free line is now officially open.

If you want to reach us again, the toll-free line is 1-888-278-8509.

Again, the toll-free line here is 1-888-278-8509.

Call us in, why don't you?

There's no cost to that because it is a toll-free number, you retard.

Okay, so continuing on, we're going to call next.

We're going to call next.

Next, we have Totally Useless Web Page Design Services in Chelsea, M.I.

I think that's Mississippi.

We have Bear to the Bone Cafe, Good Times Escort Service.

We already talked about these other ones here.

Ditsy Doodle.

I don't know about that one.

The Cocky Bull.

Let me call Juan Carlos Peon Painting.

I have an idea for that.

Juan Carlos Peon Painting.

Coming up in just one moment, folks.

The second prank call of the night in just a moment, folks.

So, is this Juan Carlos?

What have you been paying for?

Do you paint people, or just you do murals, or how it happens?

Excuse me, I'm calling from, I'm a friend of Dr. Nargas.

My name is Juan Diaz.

You're a friend of who?

Dr. Nargas.

Vargas, sir. Vargas.

Okay, we're calling from the office of Dr. Vargas.

I don't know any Dr. Vargas.

Okay, listen, listen, listen.

He heard about you.

He wants to get something painted.

If you want to come down and look at it and make a painting for him, for the office.

No, I paint houses, but I don't paint.

You don't do the role or something?

He needs a painting, a big painting of Jesus Christ, you know, with his hands out.

In front of him is a donkey.

You know the story in the Bible when Jesus came in on the donkey?

Who are you? Are you trying to be funny with me or something?

You trying to get funny with me, sir? I told you already, I'm from Dr. Nargas' office.

Okay.

Okay, so what's the problem?

What's your problem?

I'm trying to get you to do some work, you lazy Mexican.

What's your problem? Will you call me at this time?

You got some kind of problem with me, man, you lazy Mexican?

Get down here and start painting.

Yeah.

Yeah, why?

You want some painting?

Yeah, I'm going to make you eat your paint.

You want painting?

I'm going to make you eat the paint.

You want painting?

Yeah, do it.

You want painting?

I'm going to paint your face red.

Call 1 to your recorded call.

Let's try it again.

I'm changing my voice to sound like a woman.

Yeah, so why did you hang up on my husband?

Place a call.

He's not going to play.

To listen to your recorded calls, press 2.

Let's try them again.

To change your voice to sound like a woman, press 2.

To change your voice to sound like a man, press 3.

To record this call...

Yes, hello, this is Dr. Nargas.

May I speak with Don Carlos, please?

Juan Carlos, this is Dr. Nargas. How are you?

Fuck you, man. Come do my painting for me, please.

Fucking shit, that's a whore-ass doctor.

Is that all you know how to say to a doctor?

You know I'm a man of the cloth.

You probably got to be a fucking beater to be doing this at this fucking time.

Hey man, my shoes cost more than you get paid this week.

The fuck are you?

It's true.

You fucking crimey ass dick.

How much you get paid this week?

More than you, that's for sure.

I'm a doctor.

Is that possible?

You're a doctor.

What the fuck you over to pay a fucking doctor?

Look, I'm a bad doctor, bad dude, and I just smell at people.

You do the fucking prostate extension.

I make people smell my finger.

Yeah, it goes to dick.

Yours?

How much is it?

Your dick?

Dick.

How much is it?

How much?

Abortion.

Because I'm a...

How

many times are you gonna say that word, man?

Anything else to say?

Yeah?

How many times are you gonna fuck it?

Yes, hi, this is Dr. Nargas, and someone was calling me here making bad noises.

What do you sound so high for, man?

Is that all you do?

You sit around drinking Corona, painting houses, getting high?

Madness?

Yeah, motherfuckin'

What you money make?

How you money make?

Make my money?

No money make.

Money makes, man.

It's not that.

Listen, how you money make?

You must, man.

You're a bad.

You smoke.

You sniff the paint.

I think you put a straw in the paint bucket and you drink it, man.

Why don't you take it if you can, you?

You said I don't do that because I'm a doctor.

If you're a doctor.

I said exam.

Fucking asshole, you fucking crap doctor.

I tried that for you right now.

You ready?

Listen, listen.

You ready?

Yes.

You're not a guy.

Jose, not a guy.

I don't speak that language, man.

What the fuck do you speak?

i speak english like america man i speak american no you definitely don't speak america you got this

is america to tell him to stop speaking spanish in the background man you speak american only

in my country man he's speaking a i don't see

Que habla, habla espanol.

Speak American, man.

Yeah, man.

Aguardiente Cristal, man.

What's up, man?

Fucking Colombian bitch.

Fuck you, yo.

Your sister's hot, man.

If you don't anymore, I took her from you.

Nargas, man.

Fabian Nargas, man.

What's up?

What's up, man?

My bad.

I was playing with you.

You got any of that weed?

When you don't got that weed, man?

Lazy Mexican.

Sit around sniffing paint all day, man.

Okay, man.

man. I'm going to go to his house.

I said, what's up, alright? That's nothing

to say about your mother, man. I said, that's nothing

to say about your mother. I know that was funny, but

it was what it was, man. That was

Dr. Nargis, everybody. Shut up. Shut up,

people. Don't clap unless you're

asked to.

They're calling me back, man.

What's up, Carlito? Jonathan. What's up, man?

How much were y'all doing?

No one's here except for me, man. I'm running

the fort by myself. Hey, what happened

to Milt, man? He didn't come by. He lost his

internet, man. He was on

on the talk show

but then I lost him

and he never called back.

I know.

Isn't that crazy?

That is crazy.

What do we do about that, man?

They do what you got for now.

Trying to, man.

Trying to.

Hang on.

Maybe he's just...

Milkman, are you there, man?

Say something.

He's not even talking.

I don't know what happened

to Milkman, dude.

I think we lost him.

I don't know.

Oh, there he is.

Milkman, what's up, man?

Man, I've been here for...

I thought you were gone.

I'm trying to learn

this talk show thing.

It's funny.

I ended up muting Milkman

on accident for like

half the show so far.

As usual,

beer yeah yeah hang on milkman let's talk to jonathan jonathan man what's going on how's your

week been very good i'm taking a break from bus driving so that's a good thing you get fired no

i'm just a long hiatus from it i'm gonna be starting back in october oh cool cool that's

weird because the school year started just now here at least you know school's getting back in

i started school myself started the new semester this week man so uh i'm gonna be moving to

to Panama City pretty soon, either in September or October, so I'm going to be in a new apartment,

too. Oh, an apartment. Dude, cool, cool, cool. By yourself, or are you going to have your old

lady there with you? I'm going to have me a roommate. Oh, girl roommate, guy roommate?

It's a guy. He's disabled, so I work with disabled kids also. Oh, is he how disabled,

like he can't walk or he can't think? He can walk a little bit, but not much. Oh,

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, man.

We'll give it my best, man.

Oh, we will.

Hey, Amy Rose was talking to me about joining the Madhouse Live station,

which you talked to me about before.

Yeah, that's fine, man.

That'd be cool.

Fill up the ranks.

That's good, man.

Sure.

Yeah, we're all really interested.

We're trying to find some new gigs and stuff.

Okay, cool.

Cool, yeah.

I saw her in the chat room, but she never talked to me about it, though, you know?

She's got to message me online or something, and who's who?

You do a show with Emmy Rose and someone else, right?

I do a show with Emmy Rose, Donovan, and Lance and some other guys.

Do you have a regular night, or do you guys just come on when you come on, right?

We just come on every single night.

No kidding, really?

Yeah.

Oh, shit.

I've got to check that out then.

But what's the website again?

Get the website.

The last time you had the website, it was really hard to figure out.

It was like Lost Boys with Two Zs or something like that?

Yeah, it's LostBoysWith2Zs.Bravehost.com.

Bravehost.com?

Okay.

Yeah.

Okay, it's out there.

Everybody should go there, hopefully, and check them out.

Give them some patronage.

Just don't go there when KDKA and LEGO is on or whatever, but other times.

Yeah, man, that'd be cool.

As long as it's not when Madhouse is on, that'll work out perfectly, dude.

We don't have anything else on this station right now, so that's cool.

That works.

It's nothing big.

It's 45 slots at 48K.

I just changed that lately, you know?

Okay, if you go to our site, our site has been changing a lot.

We're still doing a lot of upgrades to the site.

Okay, that's good.

That's good.

I'll check that out in a little bit, man.

I'll check that out on the break.

How's that sound?

Okay.

Cool.

Well, tell Emmy Rose to call in or join in or message us or something like that.

I don't see her around right now, but for sure, man.

Okay, I can do that.

All right, buddy.

What else is going on?

Hey, man, I found out today if I'm late to work one more time, I'll get fired.

How's that for a great day, huh?

Uh-oh.

Yeah, I know.

No, I've been misbehaving.

Hey, have you called Cheese Boy lately?

No, he doesn't accept blocked calls, but you know what?

I've got the, I'm using the spoof tail card tonight.

I might be able to talk to him, as a matter of fact.

Hey, can I stay home while we do the prank call?

Yeah, sure, why not?

Okay, can you, are you in any of the chat rooms, or you're on online messaging right now?

Let me send you it on Yahoo, hang on.

Okay, am I on Yahoo?

Yes, I am.

Okay, yeah, send it on Yahoo.

Let me know when you got it.

You're like Darth Vader 4000 and 5000.

You've got like two different names up there, man.

Yeah, I've got one on Trillion and one on regular Yahoo.

Oh, you only need one, brother.

Yeah, I've got a lot of names.

Yeah, that's fine, man.

I've got a ton.

I've got like Madhouse Radio and I've got some of the private ones.

I've got, Trillion has like, let me count.

How many?

I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

I've got 10 messenger names on Trillion only for the show.

And that doesn't include my private ones.

Yeah, I know, I know.

Yeah, because, like, with Madhouse, I try to get, you know, as many different combinations of Madhouse

so people can't go out there saying, oh, I'm Carlito, you know, I don't want that to happen.

I try to stay on top of that, you know.

Okay, so this is the number, the 850 number.

Okay, you want to stay on the line, you said?

Yeah, let me send you the number so you can spoof it.

Yeah.

He'll pick up with this number.

Okay, for sure, for sure.

Who's this number from?

Let me know so, in case he asks, I can be like, yeah, this is so-and-so, you know.

I'll actually put in the actual bus bar number, because he'll answer that.

Okay, good.

Yeah, give me some information on it.

Four, nine.

Yep, yep, yep.

The party's right there.

Did you know the apocalypse is coming in 2012?

I just found out.

Breaking news here, man.

Breaking news.

The apocalypse in 2012.

Oh, okay.

You're excited about that?

I am, man.

Yep.

And spoof with this number.

And should I know anything?

Who's this number normally?

Who's at this number normally?

The one that's secondaries or one that goes at...

Is this work?

Yeah, this is his work.

Can you send me...

Don't say it over the air, but send me what the name of the place is real quick,

so in case he asks, I can be like, yeah, I'm calling from the shop or whatever.

All right, dude.

Transportation.

I'll give it out.

Now people know where you work, brother.

All right, hang on, everybody.

Jonathan's going to send that in.

I'm going to play a little tune here.

You stay on the line, and we'll do the prank call, all right, man?

All right.

All right, bro.

Hang on, everybody.

Here comes another prank.

Milkman, stay on there, too.

Say something, man.

Say something to the people.

Just say it's from Mr. Tariq.

No, he can't do a woman's voice.

Well, wait a minute.

We can change the voice on the smooth car.

Yeah, we can.

We can.

Yeah, he knows my voice.

I'm going to change it to the man's voice.

It sounds weird, because no one else can hear the woman's voice if I do that, you know?

Okay, just say it's from, I don't know, I can't remember his name.

He's the actual boss of the bus farm.

I'll just say it's from Mr. Murphy.

Mr. Murph.

That's for Malcolm Murphy.

Okay, and what does he do?

He fixes the trucks?

He fixes the buses?

Is that what he does?

No, he's in charge of the whole shop.

Oh, he is, really?

Yeah, Pete is in charge of the whole shop.

I got a bad idea.

Would it be okay if I told him the shop was on fire?

Yeah, that would be cool.

Oh, that'd be great.

Okay, let's go ahead.

Oh, my God.

All right, let's go ahead and do that.

Malcolm Murphy.

Oh, Jesus.

Jesus, okay, here goes nothing.

Hang on, everybody.

I'm going to mute my mic.

All right, hang on, everybody.

Here we go with that.

Oh, shit.

This is King Smith.

I'm sorry that you missed, but if you leave your name.

He's not answering, dude.

Hey, he's not answering.

It didn't even ring, though.

Let me try him again.

Maybe he had a bad, is that his cell phone?

Yeah, that is his cell phone.

He probably had it turned off.

Yeah, let me try it one more time in case the signal didn't go through.

All right, let's try that one more time.

Okay, if this don't work, I'll send you another number.

All right, cool, cool.

Send that now.

Yeah, let's just try the other number.

All right.

Hang on, folks.

Okay, her name, the one that I'm sending you to is, her name is Samara.

She's a funny girl, but she's a girl that I used to work with.

She's a disabled girl.

Okay.

We used to do pranks on her a lot.

Does she work?

Does she still work with you or not?

Usually I'll go and see her and stuff, but when I move back down, I'll be full-time with her.

Full-time with her?

All right, man, good.

I hear that.

It's always fun being full-time with another lady.

Yeah, especially disabled.

Oh, yeah.

They can't get away from you.

Let me give you the number.

Bird.

Coming.

Second.

All right, Samara.

Or Samara.

How is it?

Samara.

Okay.

What's her disability?

I didn't make up something.

What's her disability?

CP.

You know cheese?

I don't like it.

How's it going, honey?

Don't mention cheese boy because she'll know who it is.

Oh, shit.

Really?

That's why I asked if it was okay to call her cheese boy.

Oh, crap.

All right, hang on.

Let's try it again.

Yeah, that's all I'm saying.

Let's hear that again.

Oh, wow.

Hey, let's hear these.

Hang on.

11.27 p.m.

When do I get recorded here?

That's enough of that.

I think that's the last recording anyway.

Repeat this recording.

Press 2.

That was kind of fun.

To the next recording, 3.

You said try that woman again?

To the main menu, press 2.

Do you want that?

You said try that lady again?

Let me get back to that here.

This is the last one.

We're going to take a break after this.

Okay, this is Samara, you said, right?

That's her name?

Yeah, and this lady, that's her pink smith from Westbourne.

Okay, cool, cool.

All right, everybody, hang on.

And we're going to try one more prank call before the break.

Jonathan, stand in line.

All right, man?

All right.

Keep them right.

Okay.

What's going on, hon?

Samara?

How you doing?

Samara.

Why are you being so rude to me?

Here, Jonathan, man.

She's in play good.

She's a cheese girl.

She is a cheese girl, man.

All right, bro.

Say hi to your fans real quick before we head out here.

Go ahead and say hello to all my fans and listeners.

And I hope you come to my radio show, Life Attack Radio.

Yeah.

You know the website.

It's a call.

All right, Jonathan.

Jonathan, we'll catch you later, everybody.

All right.

And that was Jonathan, everybody.

Jonathan.

Milkman, are you there, dude?

Milkman, speak.

I command you to speak.

How is it?

I don't know how Milkman gets.

You know what it is?

There you go.

Milkman, now say something.

There you go.

You know what?

TalkShoe meets you automatically if you don't say anything after a certain amount of time.

I think that's what it is because it's meeting you on your own.

I'm not doing it.

It is not me.

Not me, my brother.

I'm watching it.

It's a TalkShoe thing.

I promise.

All right.

That was pretty interesting.

and listening to those old prank calls.

That one reclude call was pretty funny, man.

I don't even remember that, man.

There's so many prank calls I don't even remember

that get done on this show.

You're breaking up.

You are breaking up, young sir.

Young man, your phone is breaking up.

Okay.

Milkman, you going to stay on after the break?

You going to stay on for the break, man?

All right, good.

Good, good.

Are we having a good show?

What do you think?

We're doing pretty good tonight.

Not too bad, not too bad.

Considering the situation with the networks,

we're doing pretty good, man.

All right, so, yeah, if you want to call in to us

The toll-free line is 1-888-278-8509.

So if you have an itching for a prank, that's right.

Just like KDK said.

He said, ha, ha, ha, yeah.

Call in, man.

Other than that, we are taking a break, as I said.

I really love this one, though.

This one's good.

I am bisexual.

I'm fabulous.

That's great.

All right.

So in the meantime, we're going to take a break here.

We'll be back in about five minutes.

minutes uh be sure to go to madhouse live.com we'll be back in five minutes as i said it is

now 11 43 p.m the weekend is almost here it's almost friday stand by everybody two dogs all

late gotta testify up in the spot look at extra fly for the day i die house radio will be back

right after this don't tell me 40 000 people are coming here they're not here about 10 minutes ago

Guy tried to break in my truck.

Be sure to visit us online at madhouselive.com.

Yes, it's a long way to test out Puerto Rican.

Madhouse Radio will be back right after this.

Toll free at 1-888-278-509.

You know what, I hope that when you die, they put your GPS in your box and a trap door at the bottom.

When you die, you open a trap door at the bottom, GPS, and you go straight down.

Madhouse Radio is back.

you are bigger than a woman you are better than a woman we'll always be behind you do not let a

woman will ever ever make you who you are i sit alone in my four-cornered room staring at candles

Love this song, Milkman.

I'll stop now.

Gating a joint for traps.

Checking my telephone for taps.

I'm staring at the woman on the corner.

It's fucked up when your mind's playing tricks on you.

Okay, we're back, everybody.

Thanks for hanging in the break.

Those of you who stayed tuned, thank you for being tuned, in tune with us in our tuning.

I drive big cars.

Everyone knows me.

I'm like I'm a movie star.

Late at night, something ain't right.

It's like I'm a movie star.

Late at night, something ain't right.

Milkman said, meh.

You know, I was reading in the chat room, Fall was talking with KDK and the other girls in there about beef jerky.

Man, I love some beef jerky.

I was on a beef jerky trip during the month of August here.

We're wrapping it up here.

I think I consider August to be the food of August for me would be beef jerky.

I ate a ton, a shit ton of beef jerky.

I mean, I ate teriyaki jerky, and I ate some venison jerky, and different types of jerky.

I ate a lot of jerky.

Lots of different jerkies in the month of August for me.

Pretty interesting, man.

I went to this town early at the beginning of August, and this store was like every type of jerky you could think of.

milkman that had alligator jerky shark jerky uh venison jerky uh everything except for rat jerky

no rat jerky there sorry to let you know you see look that's look you see i didn't mute you

it muted yourself i didn't even meet you dude i just i see i see because it meets you the second

you come in okay really really that's what it is oh that explains what's going on dude well i'm

Trying to stay on top of it, bro.

It's not cool not having you online, man.

Hurry up and get that fixed.

Get your coconut satellite tower thing fixed, man.

Let me get you back on here, bro.

Soon enough, bro.

Yeah, man.

Yeah, but there is a lot of sodium in beef jerky, and that's not good for you.

Stay away from jerky.

There's too much salt in that stuff.

Anything that's dried, with the exception, I think, of, like, dried fruit, it's going to have a lot of salt in it, man.

Oh, milkman, you're cracking me up, buddy.

All right, guys.

Deer jerky.

Deer jerky, yeah.

You're going to have to speak up if you're on the phone, brother, man.

Speak it up.

I didn't want to.

No, no.

You used to go hunting a lot, didn't you?

Oh, yeah.

You know I've never seen the movie Deer Hunter?

Oh, really?

Yeah.

But I had a cousin in Chicago who shot himself on accident when he was a kid,

and they blamed it on the movie Deer Hunter for some reason.

Was there like a Russian roulette scene in that movie or something like that?

Oh, shit.

I know.

I was in Puerto Rico.

I was a kid.

Every summer I was in Puerto Rico.

Like about this time every year I'd be flying back,

but I would leave the week that school got out of, you know,

school ended in May or whatever.

That week, I'd fly out to Puerto Rico, and I'd be at my grandma's house until about August,

until about this time, until the beginning, middle of August, usually.

Yeah, we were there, and all of a sudden, my grandma got a call.

It's like, yeah, your cousin got shot himself.

Him and a bunch of kids were together, and they were playing Russian roulette

after watching Deer Hunter or something like that.

He was the unlucky one that shot himself in the head.

Can you believe that, dude? That's crazy.

He was like nine years old, I think.

It was like nine or something like that, dude.

That's craziness.

Craziness.

Sad story.

Don't play Russian with light, kids.

Unless you're having unprotected sex.

That's okay.

Nothing wrong with that.

You got to do it at least once before you get married.

The most dangerous gun is a gun.

Yeah.

The most dangerous gun is a gun.

Gun.

All right, Milkman.

Let's get ready for some more prank calls before we call it a night here.

The more I swung, the more blood flew.

Then he disappeared, and my blood disappeared, too.

Just like a fiend.

In the chat room, people are talking about the spoof card and how amazing it is.

It is very amazing.

And, yeah, that's about it.

And, you know, I'm starting to get away from diet soda.

We were talking about diet soda at the beginning of the show here.

I'm starting to get away from drinking diet soda.

I just want to drink water.

Maybe a little bit of lime in the water kind of deal.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey, Reclude, man.

Reclude is checking in.

He might join us here in a little bit here at the top of the hour.

We're looking forward to that, hopefully.

How many calls?

Who?

Yeah, Falls in the chat room.

What else?

Allie just joined the chat room also.

We've got Baz in the chat room.

And who else is up here?

Tuck is in the chat.

I'll let you know what you're missing.

You've got your ops right now in the PCU chat room is KDK and Nunu.

And then there's a bot named Stallion.

Lonesome Losers in there.

under plus V, and Fall, Indiegophone, Moby, Clay, Repo, and Tucker

are all in the chat room right now.

he heard you i'm sure he heard you he's listening he's sending a number let me let me uh speaking

of new news speaking of girls um we have a gentleman in bradenton florida here

milkman cut the music real quick if you could please

thank you um let's see here bradenton florida we have uh this guy here named keith wilson went

Went to some store and took photos up a woman's skirt.

She's, like, in her 40s.

It's a big test case to figure out whether doing that is illegal or not.

Dude, of course.

How can that not be illegal?

Oh, my God.

Yeah, you think it might be illegal, buddy?

It's a big test case to figure out whether doing that is illegal or not.

Yeah, I think it should be illegal.

Anyway, he's on trial.

He's on trial.

Bradenton, Florida, Keith Wilson.

Give us a moment here.

We're going to prank call him.

We've got a request from Saigon to call the Prank to Prank, rather, the Bare Bone Cafe.

We'll try that, too, if they're not closed yet.

We have a ton of numbers here from Lonesome Loser we haven't even touched yet.

We're wasting some time there with Jonathan, but that's okay.

No problem with that.

And we have some numbers here from Poop.

I promised Poop that I'd do at least one or two of his numbers, so we will try that in a moment.

I promise you.

All right, and we'll see if we get Reckle here to join in and do some prank calls here in a little bit.

Um, everybody stand by, and for the time being, we're going to prank call, as I said, we're

going to prank call, we're going to prank call the pervert who likes to take pictures

of women's skirts in a store.

One moment, please, for that.

Well, Nunu, that number's not working, brother.

I tried it twice, and I get a fast, busy signal when I call that number, so that's not going

to work, Nunu.

I tried, man, I tried.

Check it again.

Check that number that you sent me.

Double check it.

Okay.

Uh, regardless, we have more numbers, though.

We have many, many more numbers.

We have a lot of numbers, Milkman.

Nookman, are you going to meet again?

Okay, good, you're not.

We've got a lot more numbers for you to call.

What happened to Reclute?

Reclute never, okay, okay.

Reclute's coking it up and recording a demo, so you know how that goes.

He's going to be joining us here.

You know Reclute, dude.

That's awesome.

P. Philly has sent in a number for a chick named Janelle who works at Pizza Lovin'.

Pizza Lovin'?

She's hyper?

Has a tattoo-piercing and ugly boyfriend named Neil who works at AutoZone.

Oh, that's nice.

Good.

Good. We'll call him in a second. Don't worry, man. Hang in there.

Hang in there. Hang in there.

Indigo Phone said he will kill me for saying his phone.

Indigo Phone. Indigo Phone. Indigo Phone. Indigo Phone.

Okay. Yogi's Cyber Hub has just come in from Lonesome Loser here,

as well as the Pork Store Cafe Valencia.

Let's call the Pork Store Cafe Valencia. No, let's not.

That's right. I made a promise here to the most hated listener of Madhouse Radio.

that's Saigon who said that we should call who was it again the uh phone bone plain bone what

was it called something bone bone what was a bone bone but bear to the bone cafe that's in Iowa I

don't know if they're open dude we'll try this is I guess my better judgment I'll go ahead and do

that hang on looks like way too long all right well we'll continue then sorry dude couldn't do

that didn't work um the pork the pork store cafe valencia here reclude will be calling and let me

let me have regular join us here why not have some fun with a big big old reclude

coking it up dude living the dream man that's awesome fuck yeah dude just got back from

memphis man memphis fuck yeah dude i've been going on there that's cool fucking hey dude

so i'm going to new york city october just a little business trip you're gonna introduce

heavy weights and looks up with us doing like currently doing like justin timberlake and

fucking records like lino richie and shit well that's cool that's cool you're looking to break

into that kind of deal now huh yeah dude i don't give a shit whatever i just want to make a bunch

of money dude that's good that's what the maker i can do whatever i want prank people all day and

do coke coke money and pranks that's what i do anyway that's what it should be dude the american

way exactly what it's like a really chain yeah yeah nothing wrong with this just more money

More money in the bank, dude.

Exactly.

Hey, have you been listening to the show?

Because we were replaying like this.

Remember that phone card, the spoof-tail card that records calls?

You probably don't remember.

Yeah.

I played one, like, sort of playing what was on there.

There was this call you did to some lady where you told her you were going to punch her in the gut.

I don't know if you were listening to it, but it was really funny.

I didn't even remember.

Do you have a copy of that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll send you a copy of that lady.

You told her, I'm going to punch you in the gut.

She's going to punch me to death.

I was like, oh, I'm sorry.

You probably have a big gut.

She said something like that, too.

She said, I probably offended you.

You probably have a big gut.

She's like, uh.

You know what's funny is I don't even remember saying that.

Yeah, I don't even remember you saying that either.

So it actually kind of made me laugh.

That was pretty good.

Yeah.

Yeah, that was freaking awesome.

Yeah, but yeah.

So we're just here.

We're trying to do a show.

We're kind of fragmented.

PC, you split up again.

You know how that happens every six months?

Jesus Christ.

What do they do now?

I don't know.

I don't understand it anymore.

None of those guys

Like each other

I don't think

They're all like

Horrible prankers

They're all like

The worst prankers

On earth

They split up

Every day

I know right

They're so angry

They're so upset

That he's like a prank

And they split up

Every other day

They all hate each other

Because they're all

Like horrible prankers

And they just like

They just like

Hate each other

Zolar's good

I like Zolar's prankers

I love Zolar

I'll tell you what

He's one of the best

Prankers I've heard

I didn't know

He was on there

No well no

He's uninvolved

I don't think he's involved

I don't even know

No he's on his own shit

Yeah

Lego though

He's always looking for

I don't know

Whatever

Alright well

Lego's on there now

Lego's back

And KDK's upset

About something

I think

Lego's not bad though

No like

He's actually

Lego's actually

Pretty good now

I like him

I dig him man

I mean

I think it's just funny

I didn't know he was on

Like

All I know is

From before

Yeah

You remember the old times

All I think about is

Yeah

Hey

Hey, come on in here, man.

Yeah, just hold on a second.

Come on in here.

I got to show you something, man.

All right.

Cool.

All right, man.

Good deal, man.

I need to do some pranks.

All right.

Come on.

We're on a prank radio show, man.

We got to call this shit.

Yeah, man.

Hold on a second.

Let me put on speaker here.

All right.

Cool.

We'll call a prank.

A ton of fucking numbers here.

How many people are you?

You just got one other dude there?

Or is it a group of people there?

What's going on?

Dude and his girl.

All right.

What's up, girl?

Hey, girl.

What's up?

Hey.

Oh, never mind then.

All right, well, we got the pork.

Hey, man, it's Mike.

Here we go.

Oh, what's up, man?

This is Carlito, man.

MadHouseLive.com.

Carlito, eh?

Yes, sir.

MadHouseLive.com.

That's right.

Big it.

Let's prank some people here.

What's up?

All right.

All right, all right.

Yeah, we've got Hot Monkey Love Cafe in San Diego, California, if you want to call that.

Hot Monkey Love Cafe.

Let's do it.

All right, the Hot Monkey Love Cafe.

This is Reclude and his imaginary friend over there.

Hang on, everybody.

Reclude and his imaginary friend.

Yeah, that's him talking right there.

Hang on, everybody.

Brett back with the next prank call tonight.

Anything can punch me in.

I'm here.

I want you up, Jeffery.

Hello, Jeffery.

How can I help you?

How you doing, baby?

Recorded.

Two.

Add minutes to your card.

Three.

All right, we got the...

Customer service.

Okay.

Rest zero.

Okay, dude, shut up.

I got the Fatty's Chinese Fast Food.

Fuck.

Fatty's Chinese Fast Food.

Hang on, let's try that.

This is in Hawaii.

Shit.

Okay, hang on.

Let me clear that.

We got the local numbers, and they're definitely checked out.

Send it to that

And I'm using this boof tail

So I can actually make the phone look like

That caller ID, whatever you want it to be

Sweet, dude, holy shit

We could go somewhere with this

Send me the number you want it to be

Also, send the number we're calling first

And then the number we're going to make it be

After that

And

Oh, shit

Hold on a second, let me get this

Let's go through the next prank, and then I'll get this all, because it's going to take a second to set up.

I've got to get all these numbers written down.

Okay, I'm going to call Dad's Donuts while we do that, all right?

Donuts.

Dad's Donuts.

I want Prankle.

Purple Sprinkler.

Garbage.

That's right.

Prankle.

Dad's.

My daddy there.

I've been awful bad, Daddy.

She's gone.

Let's fire her back.

We've got a garbage removal here, too, in New York.

I don't know if they're open.

Yeah, they are open.

Actually, they're confirmed.

Let's do it.

Garbage.

Garbage removal.

I have to get...

Place a call.

Press 1.

Please enter the 10-digit phone number you wish...

My daddy's there.

Give me daddy.

That's fine.

She's kind of half dead, though.

You're just like, hello.

I got to figure, that's not a good promise.

Yeah, the whole daddy thing.

It's kind of perverted.

It's like, oh, no.

It's pretty funny, but it's like, it's not going to go anywhere with a cat.

Yeah.

Sounds like you're some kind of guy that...

Place a call.

It's 1.

All right, all right.

Listen to your recorded...

Please enter the 10-digit phone number you wish to call...

I'm going to call Cool Cat Tattoo.

Who is it?

Cool Cat Tattoo.

The phone number entered is invalid.

Oh, come on.

Please re-enter the number you wish to call.

Make it Darth Vader, dude.

What is it?

Is it a woman?

No, no, I did it regular.

Cool Cat.

Is this Jack?

No, it's...

Tattoos, hello?

Hey, what's going on?

Hey, well, uh...

Problem.

Problem with you.

You guys know what it is.

Guess what she got a tattoo of.

Do them.

You know what she got on her fucking arm?

Do them.

She might have been tattooed people drunk.

Still do it.

She's fucking 24.

They're following along.

I got tattooed.

I love...

Tattoo says she didn't do it.

You got it.

You gotta be kidding me.

I wanna see the receipt.

You guys got the receipts down there?

It was last.

God.

Clubs do what they do.

That's paperwork.

Let's look at it.

Worked two, three days ago.

I've been found out.

Where she got it at?

Three days ago.

Discuss it.

Gonna discuss it in great detail.

Sweetheart.

Telling you.

Once again, I see me.

I'm a worm over my fucking cocks.

One.

You wanna try him back?

Oh, there you go.

You wanna try him back or you wanna do the other one he sent?

Last minute to your card.

Hey, um.

Press three.

Press zero.

Hey, dude.

Yeah, man?

Um, there's a, I just messaged you.

Yeah, Josh.

A little number.

Yeah, you want me to do that now?

Yeah.

Rolling Stone or something.

Cool, okay, hang on, let's do that.

A voice message.

Oh, fuck.

Or just wait for the tone.

To send a numeric page, press 2 now.

Tone, record your voice message.

When you are finished recording, you may hang up or press pound for more options.

I just heard you guys open up for, what is it, Newport Hall?

And I was rearing you guys out.

If we can get an audition, that would be great.

Uh, you know why? Cause you're a fuckin' half-ass piece of shit, and nobody likes you, and nobody a fuckin' fan of d-

YOU'RE A FUCKIN' FUCKING-

I'm taking myself on me, okay, that's it, we're clear off, we're clear off the line.

What's that guy's deal? Is that the guy we called the other day that he, like, had a conversation, that he said he knew Kung Fu and all some shit like that?

Oh, no, you know what's funny? They called my friends, I was right after that, like, who the fuck's got my number?

No, that guy was pussied out, he was supposedly, like, a hard-ass.

Well, yeah, I guess not.

I heard that dude.

Dude, that guy's going to be pissed, too.

Is that guy a big guy?

No, he's all right.

Oh, he's pussy.

I can beat his ass.

All right, good, good.

We're all right, then.

I'm going to stab him.

He's a Lancaster kid.

Okay, he's a Lancaster.

He's far away from me.

Lancaster.

Is that Ohio still?

You live in Ohio, right?

Isn't it Cleveland?

Cleveland shit?

Somebody's going to ask him, fuck you.

I shouldn't say things I say all the time.

I always say, fuck your mother.

That's so wrong.

All right.

Do you mind if my buddy Mike makes one prank, and then we're going to get off here?

Yeah, that's fine.

We've got stupid prices in Hawaii.

What's Stupid Prices?

Is it a store?

Let me do it.

Yeah, it's a store called Stupid Prices.

It's in Hawaii.

All right, let's try it.

In Hawaii.

All right, here comes that, folks.

Stand by.

Mickey!

Can I help you with something?

They don't have a location right now.

Can you help me out?

Excuse me.

Give me your card.

Let me through.

Give him nothing.

That's funny.

All right, you guys, since you guys are going, come on.

All right, man, we're going to...

All right, guys.

Hey, Mike and Reclude Day, guys.

Thanks for calling in, man.

It's always an honor having Reclude on the line.

Hey, no problem, man.

Hey, send me that link, brother, if you get a chance.

I'd like to hear that prank again.

Yeah, that was good, man.

I'll let you hear that.

That was really funny, man.

Badass, dude.

All right, man.

Well, I'm going to talk to you later.

All right, man.

Later, man.

That's Reclude, everybody.

Yes, indeed.

That was Reclude.

Reclude.

Good night tonight, man.

It hasn't, you know, I can't say, I've got to stop saying negative things about the show.

So we don't have that bad of a show.

Have a great show, man.

You too.

Hey, man, thanks.

We got one of the best of all.

Yeah, one of the best of all in all the radio internet stuff.

All right, man.

Hey, man, because we have variety, man.

It's not a madhouse show.

No, we totally are.

Well, if anybody wants to call in, now's the last chance for romance.

We're going to end the show here in a few minutes.

We're going to do one last call, but I'm just saying,

if anybody wants to call in before we do the last call,

If anybody wants to call in and make themselves known, now's the time.

I'd like to thank Lonesome Loser for sending in numbers.

We called a lot of them here in the last few minutes.

That was kind of fun, man.

Thanks, Lonesome.

You did your job as usual.

You can take a break now.

If you confirm anything, Lonesome, if you have any other numbers you just confirmed, send them in.

If not, consider yourself a job well done tonight.

Thank you, man.

As always, you're the man.

Couldn't do it without you here.

As Milkman says about 20 times a show.

Anything else here?

We've got a number, you know, I said we'll do a poop number here.

Just to say that at least I tried it.

Give me a second and we'll try that.

I was going to say Constantine.

Constantine is listening.

Constantine is listening for the first time in a long time.

Good to have him here.

You know, we've got 30 listeners here.

Not bad for this time of night and for after yet another split up of the PCU family.

And that's very good.

Very good, yes, very good.

Some guy on Amiibo is calling me Satan.

Okay, cool, man.

Sinking it is, or whatever you want to call me, dude.

I'm Jeebus.

Hey, yeah, Jeebus.

No, not in a while.

No, he's probably sleeping.

He's probably sleeping, you know.

He's busy.

He's moving.

Well, he's like you.

He's been in the middle of moving like you, but he'll be back around, I'm sure.

Yeah, well, true.

But he's moving still.

You know the situation here with moving.

He's all busy moving and moving.

So, yes.

Uh-oh.

I heard a satellite sound.

That's a bad sign.

Oh, my goodness.

Uh-oh.

The handshake.

We got, you know, Lindsay Lohan.

I guess all she's getting is one day of jail for what she did for her double DUI cocaine possession.

What the hell?

Here's the news.

I don't know how breaking this is.

This is earlier tonight, so we'll give it a little bit of the crisis sound.

Lindsay Lohan reached a plea deal Thursday on misdemeanor drunken driving and cocaine charges

that calls for her to spend one day in jail, serve 10 days of community service,

and complete a drug treatment program.

Let me tell you what.

Let me get pulled over drunk with cocaine in my pocket

and see if I get one day in jail on 10 days of community service.

I'd like to see that.

Must be good to be born dumb and white, you know?

Yes, sir.

It is a privilege.

Speaking of...

Jim Bob.

This is Jim Bob.

Oh, man, Touchstone Terror is good stuff.

What have they been up to lately?

I haven't heard anything out of that camp in, like, years, man, since, wow.

See, because I always thought it was just like they were taking out a toll-free number

with, like, one digit off is what I thought it was.

No, no, no, they're phone freaks.

You know, didn't there used to be, like, a whistle you could buy, like a special whistle?

Yeah, a black box.

I thought there was a whistle that if you blew it into a payphone receiver, it would give you a drop.

Yeah.

Get done away with this.

Yeah, you can't do that.

Yeah, but you could go to a pay phone and blow a whistle into the pay phone receiver

and it would make the phone believe that you dropped a quarter

and you could do all the phone calling you want.

And it ended up being, you could actually do like international phone calls

on a pay phone for free using a whistle.

It was really crazy, yeah.

And it was just like.

No, you could just sit there, cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching.

That's fun.

That is fun.

Wow, that's cool.

That's cool, man.

You can't do that stuff anymore.

Yeah, but who even, I mean, you're hard-pressed to find a working payphone anywhere where I live these days, man.

You know, one day, yeah, that's not bad, that's not bad, but they got, I used to hate using payphones before, you know, cell phones were big, and when I was in high school, I had to use a payphone at school, at high school, you know, call my parents to come pick me up after football practice or whatever, and it was just, it's just so nasty, because, you know, everybody used it, and it's always outside, it was all gunky and crappy,

and you never know what crap he could pick up from that nasty-ass payphone receiver and crap.

You know what I mean?

That's nasty.

Oh, man, I hope so.

Okay.

That sounds like a fun time.

Hey, let's go down to town and pretend we're on the payphone here.

Yeah, well, you know what?

When I first got my cell phone, too, I thought it was funny.

Like, I would call my cell phone from the payphone to get the caller ID number.

Then I would call it back and prank call people as they walked out of the grocery store.

and I'd watch them from my car

and I'd be talking to them, talking stupid.

I had so many good

prank calls that I did when I was younger that

I never recorded because it was way

before I even

thought, even knew anything about

prank call, underground radio and all that stuff.

Those were times.

Anyway,

those are classics.

Yeah.

Oh, you know, I can

actually recreate that.

You want to hear that?

I can do that with my...

I've got the old 70s-style phone patch here.

Watch this.

Watch.

If I call the house with the phone patch turned on,

if you can hear that buzzing noise, watch this.

Isn't that cool?

I can actually recreate that.

That brings back old times, doesn't it?

That's exactly what you're talking about right there.

Yeah.

Yeah, man.

Yeah.

Well, yeah.

Supposedly, Baz is saying that supposedly there's a new Touchstone terrorist

coming out in 2008

and the news is over at

junkyardwilly.com, so apparently they're working

on a new CD, so

that's cool. Those are great.

Those are good prank calls, man.

Yeah, Scooter, man.

Scooter's riffing is always going to be...

This is Scooter. Yeah, that's

always going to be a classic there.

For sure, for sure. Milkman, take us out of here, bro.

It's time. No one's called in.

We're going to end the show now. It's late. It's almost

1 o'clock. We've done two hours. We've done our limit.

Dr. Leggo is about to kick us off.

I'd like to thank Kenny Strogan, one of the MOT's kids.

And he's just fabulous.

Also, I'd like to thank, in the Post-Humans Award, Mr. Ted Webb.

Well-loved dear friend, you are missed and loved.

Out there listening, please take care of yourself and pop back in whenever you get a chance.

Be sure to miss him and look forward to what you get.

Dr. Lego, what can I say?

Dr. Bro, thanks a lot, man.

I appreciate all you do.

You are a wonderful trooper, spirit of fun.

Thank you so much.

And Hermano, oh, my goodness.

What would we do without you, big man?

You are our leader.

I need you, Hermano.

Thank you so much for all you do and the reliability of this thing.

We go to the side house every week.

So we didn't do not stop you.

We go to the side house.

I'd like to thank you very much for the wonderful talk show.

Yeah, it wasn't for talk show, you wouldn't have been here at all tonight, man.

So talk show kind of came through for you tonight.

It's every week.

We pay and come in and share.

Smith out.

I mean, go sign up.

All right, thank you, man.

Yeah, that's everybody, I guess.

Reclude, everybody who called in.

Jonathan, that was it.

Jonathan, Reclude, I do want to thank the hardest working man in the numbers hit man.

Thank you so much.

There's a Junkyard Willie movie apparently here.

That's something called it.

Someone sent me, I'm not going to click it now, but someone sent a link for lostintransit.com.

Lostintransit.com.

Apparently, it's a Junkyard Willie movie.

That sounds interesting.

I don't know if that's legit.

I'll check it after the show, though.

So people want to check that out.

Okay, cool.

I'll check that out on the show.

We'll give you a full review.

Milkman will have a full review of LostInTransit.com next week.

That's it.

We'll be here next week at 11 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, our new start time.

You're out there.

Thanks so much for tuning in.

Yeah, and thanks to everybody who we did.

That's it.

Everybody who got prank called tonight, thank you for being such a good sport.

We are done.

The class of 1997 is out of here, everybody.

We will catch you here next week.

As I said, thank you very much.

Phil Henry coming up next on the Madhouse Radio Network.

Bye for now.

Paul, don't go and tell me that I owe you money.

I'm an attorney.

Ma'am, I have gas.

Listen.

You owe me $5 for breaking the toilet.

Breaking the toilet?

What toilet?

Tell me where it is.

The white toilet.

I told you already.

My name is Bo Steen.

I ain't tripping nothing cause I didn't break nothing

I don't use any box of toilet

You came down, you used the toilet, you took a big shit

I took a big shit

Yes

And it wasn't me Sal

It was not me, you got the wrong guy

Calls (8, 32 min of 1 h 34 min)

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