I’m With The Pizza

Ma'am?

Yes.

Do I sound like a chick to you?

I don't know.

I don't have...

I can't see you.

You're on the phone.

I'm being polite.

You're being polite.

My penis.

He wanted to touch my penis.

I'm having this phone call, Trace.

So if I were you, you better quit calling.

You're out of your crazy mind.

Dude, this number's going straight to the right authorities.

You're nasty.

I know.

That's why they like me.

The girls like that.

Have you tried it?

Try it now.

Let's listen.

I want to listen.

Bye-bye.

Come on.

Start kissing her down there.

Wake her up.

Who the fuck is this?

Who is this?

You are listening to the Madhouse Radio Podcast.

You are the fucking...

Speak your name.

Good evening.

I speak my own name.

Hello, everybody.

Good evening, Madhouse Radio.

Hello.

Hi, people.

Good to see you.

Get it?

Right.

I'm here.

Carly, the host for the evening.

Madhouse Radio.

This will be our first show of the year.

First show of the year.

January 5th, 2012.

All right.

I'm looking mighty handsome, if I must say so myself.

Allow me to say so myself.

I look mighty handsome tonight.

night speaking of handsome second in command of madhouse radio milkman milkman are you there sir

man wait a minute wait wait wait thank you so much for coming back man we sure have missed you i

talked to you last year on the show oh man and my cousin you're looking awful looking out there

captain's hat yes i do say so myself well thank you i appreciate it thank you milkman very nice

of you and you look good yourself as always you look very handsome handsome young man nice broad

shoulders hey man that's what we do here man we're a big old house we're a big house we protect

Take care of my knees, though, man.

I got your back.

Toilet.

My bathroom.

Good deal.

Well, there we go.

And that's us, man.

Yeah.

Thank you for joining us, everyone.

We'll be taking your requests here for prank calls.

Sorry I didn't make it last week.

It was a little bit of a scare, but it ended up being okay.

That was maybe a little more worried than I should have been.

Had a little bit of a freakout last week, but it was okay.

Anyway, I'm your host, Carlito.

If you want to join us here, send in your requests.

MadhouseLive.com has the free-to-use Request a Prank form.

Use that there.

AOL Yahoo Instant Messengers, Madhouse Radio.

AOL Yahoo Instant Messenger Users, Madhouse Radio.

MSN Messenger Users, Madhouse at Live.com.

If you get a chance, be sure to follow us on Twitter.

Madhouse, at Madhouse.

I don't know how exactly you're supposed to phrase that, but that's what it is.

and uh add madhouse live carlito pranks and madhouse life pranks on facebook on the line

now big old milkman yeah there we go sir how you doing my friend so good to be back

one more year older yeah thanks man i thought about things all day that we could talk about

but no no no i can't remember any of them i just don't know man uh iowa primer what about him oh

Oh, God.

So it's obvious we're going to war with them.

Now, I've said this, I say this every week,

but Iran came out and said,

you send that carrier back.

Iran didn't say that,

but they say Iran said it.

So basically it means we've agitated,

the CIA has agitated Iran enough to the point

with little clandestine little acts

inside of Iran and around Iran

to the point where they're pissed off

is exactly what's happened.

If you ask me, that's my opinion.

and i have no proof of this but if you ask me that's what's going on they've been pushed around

enough by the cia and covert operations probably and the carrier group left the strait of hormuz

as scheduled it patrol there's different patrolling fleets they have to because that's a

it's a point in the persian gulf where it all comes together right there it's a very sensitive

point and all that oil from saudi arabia goes through there on tankers on its way past uae

around the persian gulf around the arabian peninsula and off to points around the world

so the uh navy of course patrols that often but they leave often the carrier doesn't stay out

there they go they do the patrol to come out they go to do the patrol to come out iran said

when it comes back it's on and i guess it's going to be on look down the drone a while back and then

like there's been a debate back and forth what they actually did or does all right and that

That's kind of like as far as promulgating this whole thing here.

Oh, bullshit.

They said that.

They said they shot down a drone.

The drone just crashed or failed or lost its internet connection anyway.

That's what happened.

I bet you anything that's what happened.

Dude, they must have been a promcast.

They probably did have promcasts in the bunker in Tampa, Florida where they were controlling it.

You know, way across the world.

They forgot to reboot the Wi-Fi modem before they took off the drone for the day and it got all flaky.

now see if they had you in there you could have already told them power cycle and took them through

the whole power cycle check your network cable yeah check your ip address see if you can ping

your router they didn't do that by the time they started power cycling when the drone went they

said they shot it down it's funny because uh yeah laugh track matt was on here and he uh a few weeks

ago and he's he put it out they said they shot it down and then like two days later they showed it

But, like, we, you know, here's the drone that we shot down.

It looked like it was in perfect condition.

Like, wow.

Did you shoot it down with a Nerf ball?

They threw Nerf footballs at it.

A Nerf football bat.

You shot it down with a...

You shot it...

You could probably shoot that down with a fire hose, those things, man.

Go under it.

Cannot fly.

Poor drone.

They should...

I think those drones have AI, and it's probably scared right now.

Hell, they're holding that drone hostage.

The poor thing.

It wants to come back to its mothership.

Poor drone.

Poor baby drone.

Please, release.

Calling for Will Smith here, please.

They're torturing the drone.

They're anal raping the drone.

Who knows what those Iranians are doing to that poor drone.

Man, that drone just wants to die right now.

The drone's like, please, disconnect me.

Things automatically come in for a landing, you know.

Whenever you're locked in, etc.

All right, well, here we are, folks.

Sending your prank call requests.

Oh, hey, I wanted to mention, here's something.

You guys know that I'm a Twit This Week in Tech fan.

You know Leo Laporte?

I know you know who Leo Laporte is, right, Milkman?

Hell yeah, man.

Leo's all right.

He's a little bit stupid about Macs and Apple in general, but he's all right.

You know, right before the Christmas break, Leo was doing one of his shows.

Oh, wow.

he he is too funny he was uh he was demonstrating you know you know someone could look i think it

was something someone could look at your laptop and find out what you're doing or blah blah blah

something like that you know and on on the twit network they they have all their laptops are

connected so you can get their video like on the podcast to see what they're talking about or see

where they're browsing or playing and they i guess they cut over to his laptop and he was in google

voice having a steamy sexting conversation with the ceo of his company and uh leo laporte is

married by the way this is not his wife and uh i think part of the message is he had sent her

earlier in the day i'm naked in my bed waiting for you please just come into the front door

and uh now i i can't leo said that i just can't get the vision out of my mind of leo laporte

naked in bed, probably

in the sheets, you know, covered up

in a comforter.

He's just one goofy looking fucker anyway.

Yes, he is. I love the guy.

I love his shit, but I just, like,

can't imagine. It's like thinking about

an uncle of mine, you know.

Hey, I'm naked.

I've got sexy lingerie

on, baby. Oh, he's such a dork,

you know. And then after that,

two hours later,

uh there was well two hours later he messaged her also um i can still taste you and smell you

i love you or something like that wow how the hell did they get this man huh how did they get

this information he cut over to his laptop on the video one of his podcasts and it was on google

voice he was texting in google voice on the browser oh and he didn't realize that it actually

made it to the podcast no one realized it until it hit the web and then i guess some viewers caught

it and they sent it to celebrity gawker and all these websites and it started making the rounds

over the christmas break you know so oh my gosh so i guess ol's got a little explaining to do

i'm telling you man happy noel ol oh poor leo man i just you know he was embarrassed and then he uh

he was talking back about it then we could talk about this is google voice you know we're a google

voice related show this is on topic for our show so uh he um i guess on twitter during the break

when it after broke the news story broke during the christmas break people were like you know

what's going on and he's like you know he got pissed off and good on leo for putting it this

way this is the way any celebrity in this situation should act he said i'm not running

running for president i'm a human being i've been separated from my wife and it's none of

your business really so what's the problem and that's exactly the attitude those people should

take it's like i'm not running for fucking president i'm not fucking really i'm not a

fucking pastor of the president but you know what all right so what oh my god i slept with the girl

big dude you know he had a hit he he had to leo's credit leo handled it well man leo did a very good

That was a good comeback.

Yeah, he did a good job of handling it.

But I just wonder, you know, how exactly pleased was the CEO?

You know, I'm sure she's like really, you know, steaming after that and not the box.

She's kind of cougarish because there's a show that they do together.

And then if you look at this, yeah, if you look at the show now, it looks really, it's really awkward.

You just think of him.

Her name's Lisa.

Toke asking, is it him or is the video fucked up?

The video is always, excuse me.

the video's always fucked up sir i'm presuming you're a sir toke's a new member in the chat room

welcome big toke good to see you toke toke uh video always has trouble you know it's up there

don't rely on the video rely on the audio on the shoutcast that's what you need to do my friend

milkman what have you been like what was your new year's like did you go out and party oh no you

were working right you have a busy uh you have a lot of people in the taxi cab i'm guessing oh my

My God, dude, we were so fucking busy, dude.

Like, it wouldn't be one second, man, I pushed a button, and there'd be another one coming, man.

Oh, my God.

And then they'd be falling off the fucking sidewalks, dude, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of dollars later.

I didn't even get a break, and I was worn out, dude.

But, man, you talk about rocking.

Right.

We rocked.

You rocked.

Yes, sir.

All kinds of hot chicks, man.

I got invited to all kinds of parties and get drunk and shit.

it. I did go visit and partake for one little party there just about the end, dude, and

it was the coolest place I've ever seen, man. It looked like one of these movie sets, dude,

with like the whole psychedelic thing, man, you know, the paintings on the wall, the

sculptures, the statues, the lighting, the whole bit, man. I was stoked, man. I was like

freaking out, dude. I thought, man, I'm like in another world, too. This is not even really

really happening right so well done wow that's good man awesome i'm glad that was so cool man

i'm glad that worked out for you so yeah there's a lot a lot of there's a lot of cool people out

there man that just don't even know man you got that everybody make a note what milkman said

there's a lot of cool people out there you don't even know that's a beautiful statement you just

made milkman i really like that one good on you man good and i think you told me some some lady

he almost puked in your taxi and you want her to puke

because you would have gotten a huge payment out of that?

How much did you have to pay?

Oh, yes, yes, okay.

Actually, there's a $250 fine associated with a cab chunking.

Oh, my God.

So if I throw up in your cab...

I probably would have gotten some rubber gloves

and let him get it for about like $3,

got the degreaser from the dollar spring,

and I would have kept it for $248.

Good God.

So they charge you.

But what are you going to do?

Are you going to force someone?

I'm like, what if they don't have the $200?

What if they're paying cash and they got $50 for the fare?

What are you going to do?

You call the cops, man, and they're fucking busted.

What do you mean they're busted, though?

What are you busting them with?

I don't understand.

You're not allowed to vomit in a cab like that, dude.

You're responsible for a fine for paying for that shit

because technically you need a professional cleaning.

Okay, well, so you can charge them and get their info and bill them for it.

You can't get them arrested because they're wrong.

No, no, no, you don't bill fucking nobody, dude, because that motherfucker always cancel or deny a charge.

It's now or not.

If not, then the cops will get your information and you will pay it.

Yeah, man.

All right, take it easy, tough guy.

Sorry, man.

That was hardcore, dude.

I've had people fucking spit at me many times because, you know, you know how nice I am, dude.

Okay, dude, all right, I'm going to be ill this time, man.

Just make sure you get me next time.

And no fucking next time never comes.

For a little of six fucking dollars, I had people.

Just a six fucking dollar ride

You sound pretty upset about this

Milkman

No man it's actually a pretty good deal

$250 is not a bad deal

When I can clean it up for about $3

Wait a minute

You just said you have to get a professional to clean

So you're a scammer

What is this

You just said

If I didn't want to fuck with it

But me being who I am

And not fucking scared to know that shit

shit dude i had to clean it myself and get the money wow okay so i didn't want to deal with it

yet technically i would hire a cleaner there's a lot of pussies out there who are afraid of

smells or you know any of that kind of stuff man like a baby poop or whatever man they're all

freaked out about that shit none of that shit bothers me dude i was a meat cutter man for 10

years man so once you've been you know in meat shop dude there's no smell in the world it'll

fucking bother you did you say the baby poop my nephew's diapers man shit that don't even

I can't take it

I'm not fucking around

I can't take that

Vomit

Poop

I don't know what I'm gonna do

When we have a baby

If we ever do here man

I don't know what I'm gonna do

Because I

It's just

Cool

You know

You're just gonna man up

And be a father

I know you'd be a good father dude

You'd get over that

Quick man

It's just fucking

Yeah

Fine man

Get fucking

Pills up as fucking

and you change his little ass

because that's your flesh and blood.

Man, you can't have his ass

rotting away and turning red, you know,

because somebody didn't want to change him.

I might just have my wife do it, you know?

Yeah, but your wife's not going to be able

to do it 24 hours a day.

Yeah, she won't.

I'm probably going to be a two-working asshole.

So, you know, you're going to have to take your turn, man.

Nah, she could do it 24 hours a day.

It's a job.

That's what women are for.

That's what I'm made for.

Well, okay.

All right.

Yeah, right.

It's debatable, man,

man, but actually, I'd like

to see it happen, man. If it does, I'll shake

your hand, man. You'll shake my head.

I'll shake your hand. That's

cool. You're the man,

Northman. Alright, so look, I'm looking here.

I'm trying to find the number

for the... I'm trying to remember

if anybody here has any clues.

The black guys, those angry

Asiatic guys from

the show back in October

that we did. I don't know

if you guys know what I'm talking about.

They were like, you know, oh, Jesus, this

this and all that i'm trying to see if i can remember you know where they're at where they're

at or um what the number might be i have it saved here somewhere i'm scanning through these calls

from that night trying to see if i can find out what that was it was a moving thing right if i

were you weren't around for that milkman i don't think i remember dude i'm sure i probably was

there but i was probably busy so i i usually remember specific calls but that one don't

come to mind yeah i hear you well it was a while ago i mean i think it might actually been before

october to be honest with you but we had someone who kept taking the google voice line that we were

using for a while for a few weeks and they were making their own ads so what happened is everything

got filled up now i can't find shit this fucking sucks they are making their own ads they with that

phone number some listener i didn't even give the number out some jerk off listener did that i

I remember I got really pissed off about it.

It's like, sure, just make one ad.

Don't be a dick.

Or just don't, you know, like, if you're not part of the show,

you're not involved, you know, don't really get involved like that, man,

because it fucking ruined it for everybody.

I mean, they didn't have shit.

Let's see if this is a voicemail here.

I think this might be it.

Might not be.

Oh, we're just going to give it out numbers.

My name is Antonio.

I'm calling to help you move.

You say you got a free spot.

I need TV.

I don't know PlayStation.

You show me how to hook up.

That's good.

That's good, man.

You call me, Antonio, 770-871.

All right, that's the right night, so we've got to go back.

Let's see if this is it.

I remember it was a long, drawn-out one.

Hi, my name is Mark.

I just saw you out on Craigslist.

I'm up on first, or do you need help?

I just came back in town.

I live, actually, over here in Chinatown.

Yeah, I'd be happy to help you guys.

I move stuff all the time because I own some properties and stuff,

so I'm really good at it.

So, no, I'll help you out.

I just moved in an apartment over here.

I actually have a smaller television.

The 32-inch would really help me out.

Something a little more bigger to view.

And the desk would be nice because I'm making an office here in this other bedroom.

And also the bed for a guest bed.

Yeah, if you need my help, I'll come help you.

Pack up, help you move, you know.

Just call me back at 6-7.

I think that's him.

I'm not sure.

He doesn't sound too black.

I remember his calls.

We had TVs and shit.

Yeah.

All they had to do was like help

Let me see, let me see, man

Let me call him, see if this is him

Hello?

Assalamu alaikum, my brother

What's going on? Are you a black man?

Are you a black man?

No, I'm a white man

Do you know who that black guy is that we talked to?

I think I got the wrong number, man

No, I talked to you

About a Craigslist ad back in September

Oh, yeah

Yeah.

Yeah, do you remember that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That lady on the house, she had some SSI people,

and right when she rented a truck and they were moving,

two of the people pulled out.

I don't know, so she couldn't get the place,

and now it's back up for grabs.

Oh, is it?

Yeah, but it's a little bit different now.

It's $4.75 a month with $4.75 down plus a half.

It's about $3.5 to $2.37.

Who's renting it?

You are?

are yeah i'm writing it all right so what would you need i've got all that money yeah you uh um

we can get together well i'm out of town right now i get the uh sammy the neighbor across streets

got the he's got the lease papers and the keys so because that lady i had her to town now she

didn't want it now i'm like you know so yeah the uh you have a so living in griffin's okay for you

you live you're from griffin or what yeah yeah i am and then so do you think maybe um i could

could send you some pictures of me maybe that might work things make it a little easier on you

at first uh well my main thing to me is like do you work at griffin or what's your uh income well

my income is uh it's like 62 000 a year you got it well yeah yeah we could say that damn it yeah

yeah yeah that's pretty good money and then uh but i'll send you some pictures of me you know

and posies and uh you look at the pictures would that be okay and then you can send it

m-a-r-k-i-n markin yeah yeah m-a-r-k-i-n-a-s-i-a and what kind of stupid name is that what was

going on what about that mark in asia at earthlink.net mark in asia at earthlink.net

okay that's it and you want to see about the pictures of me no i mean uh what do you you

you married you got kids dog yeah well no i'm single i've got a dog okay okay and so then you

can come over whenever you want you can keep the key and you i want you you can come over in the

middle of the night and you can sleep in the bed with me that's okay i don't mind okay i got you

is that okay um i'm in nevada dude yeah but then you know what's going on i mean i just want to

rent a house that's all i'm interested in right now well i'm not looking for trouble you know

I'm offering my bed for you

if you want. I'll move in and I'll pay

all the money, but whenever you want, you come in

and you can take advantage.

You're the landlord. You're the superior force.

You're the alpha male.

When it comes to rental properties, I'm pretty much

straight up. I appreciate it, man. Thanks for calling.

Oh, come on. Please.

Alright, man. I have to get a phone.

I'm tracing.

I'm tracing this call.

Okay. Trace it and whatever.

I'm going to get off the line now, so if you don't want to write

the property then that's it i'm gonna rent the property i mean i'm gonna rent the property but

you're gonna come in whenever i want you to come in oh yeah all right man i'll talk to you later

man i gotta go appreciate it coming to my coming to my bed whatever you know you know how the first

pranks of the nights go here all right guys yeah anyway that was the wrong one now this might be

the black guy let's see yeah it's the fucking mexican again man damn it let's call the mexican

He doesn't even sound like a Mexican.

Yeah, I remember him.

He's like, you want to show me how to cook it up?

Let's do it.

Hang on, I'm going to call him with a stupid Mexican voice.

I'm going to talk real stupid to this guy.

Yeah, let's do it.

Come on.

The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable.

Please leave a message after the tone.

Yes, Antonio, give me a call back, okay?

You got it.

Maybe he'll call me back.

Okay, Antonio.

Milkman, any ideas here?

any buddy you'd like us to call

that we've called recently

I just feel like following up with some of these

people

unfortunately Debbie Mansfield won't ever answer the phone anymore

yeah he was cool

the Turkish guy's cool we can call him

Jin

I don't think is going to make it this week

I didn't get a chance to talk with him during the week

and he's not going to get up really early

I'm sorry about last week

had a scare

started developing a lot of pain and flashes of light

in that eye that i had the retina attached in and um uh that day the the day the night before

and the day of last show wednesday night thursday morning so i opted to uh go to the eye doctor

to have him check it out and um he said everything was fine he said the eye is better than he would

expect not to worry just probably a little dull uh he had yeah it will just probably a little

i don't know he said he figured maybe i wasn't resting enough so the eye was a little strained

so he recommended i not go on the computer for a few days uh especially the fact that i was

starting i started work tuesday my new job so he said go ahead and just rest your eyes

he told me stay out and and at that point like if i was like trying to look at my android phone

to tell people i'm not gonna do a show and it would hurt so much so uh he adjusted uh my eye

eye medication and he uh gave me uh you know some advice and at the same time the work that he did

in the eye to check it out just kind of had me hurting so i'd say i'm not gonna do a show i

couldn't couldn't do it it would have been very uncomfortable to do it so that's why i wasn't on

last week but no anyway it was uh by the time the show started i knew i was okay but i was just way

too much pain but it hasn't been an issue that's

That's the guy that thinks he's funny.

From phone winners, I think.

he sucks

calls shows all the time

it's so unfunny

he's got that stupid voice

he goes

wow you're funny

who's that

is that the man in the gown

no

no no no

that wasn't him

um

well yeah

I've just about given up here

and trying to find this out

hi

um

I just heard about

about the

I just can't remember

the guy at first

he left the voicemail

and everything

he was real polite

then he got really weird

really fast

let's see

for today

back

I don't know who that is

I don't even know

who that is that's funny let's see this i think this is my dad let's listen to my dad boom that's

my dad everybody he's crazy he's taught he doesn't usually sound like that he's being stupid that's

pretty funny though baby sounds like talk to you on saint troy man that was cool yeah that's my dad

that's my old man i guess crazy he's pretty happy he got taken off some of his meds he was on some

expensive uh medicine after his heart attack for the stints they put in his um heart they had him

on some Plavix, gosh, it was like $150 a month or plus, and they told him he was doing good

enough to get off of it, so he's pretty excited about that, blah, blah, blah, blah, okay,

um, I, I probably should have, you know, tried to get that number ahead of time, I just can't

find it, it sucks, man, really wanted to call that guy, let's see, what's this one here,

hi, I just called, uh, yeah, we just played that one already, alright, well, there you

um yeah if you uh want to call in uh skype in you're more than well we can open the skype lines

a little earlier than we'd like to here anybody out there uk ted i don't even know if uk ted and

them are around usually by now they've tried to call in but you can't that's fine uh tombstone's

calling in he's just a freak watch listen to this guy milkman he's a real fucking pervert this kid

Listen to this kid

Tombstone

SRT8

IG69

What did you change your number for?

What's going on with your ID?

Because it's cooler this way

SRT8

What am I supposed to call you?

SRT8

You're going to choose a name like a normal name?

That's weird

Call me Richie

I'm just going to call you IG69

Tombstone's on here

He's not saying anything

thingy. He's usually really creepy

sounding. Hey, do we still have

the number for Crazy Trucker, man?

Uh, no. Uh, his

number that I did have for him, if you

call him now, it's some lady

who doesn't like being talked to about.

She knows. I know his

real name. I won't give it out.

Uh, but I said, is so-and-so there?

And she's like, you know, people keep calling

for him. He's not here. And then,

uh... Why don't you have Lonesome Loser

see if we can recon him?

I don't know that he...

He's off the grid

I mean if you think about him

He's really not on the grid

He might not even have a phone

I don't even know

Crazy fucker

He might listen still

I've always said

If you're out there just drop me an email or something

I'd like to know about you

Tombstone

Hey creepy guy how you doing

I'm okay

Every time you always ask what you want to grow from

Is that a joke

And be honest man don't be a milkman

No, it's not a joke at all.

Why are you looking for a girlfriend on Phone Losers and Madhouse?

Why?

What do you think we have?

We have two girl listeners.

Yeah, I know.

But they might have friends, you know,

and they will tell, you know, like two or three other friends,

and they will tell other friends, and eventually 100 people will know.

Okay.

Do you want to give out your Facebook or an email

or somewhere where the ladies can meet you or find you?

Um, I have a Gmail account, Tombstone, P-L-A, at Gmail.

Wow.

Palestinian Liberation Army?

I'm sure the ladies are just going to be rolling in pretty soon, man.

Well, there you go, everybody.

You got, uh, Tombstone, I hope you find a girl.

Have you ever kissed a girl, Tombstone?

Um, yeah, I've had sex with two girls, but that's, last time I had sex was in March.

How old are you?

It's getting to me.

I'm 20.

You're 20, and you had sex in March for the most recent time.

And just two girls, just twice, like once each, or have you had multiple?

No, multiple times.

Multiple times.

Okay.

Hey, we have Tombstone online.

I'm going to get down.

Tombstone, he seems like a complicated character.

I'm just trying to figure out.

All right.

Don't disconnect him quite yet.

Keep him on there.

Hey, Tombstone, it's Tabachi.

Hi.

Don't scare him.

Hey, I know we've been rough around here before,

but I just wanted to say I think we need to make amends and hook up again.

Have a cool.

no homo okay all right that's cool all right tombstone yeah just unblock me no we'll get it

nice and even again okay what tombstone what do you have to offer the ladies exactly what do you

like what do you have a job yeah um i don't know i'd spend a lot of money well no not no that

sounds desperate no i'd be good okay yeah do you have any talent sexually that you're good at do

you like going down um like i do that like spell the alphabet trick with your tongue good that's

That's good.

I've been listening to Matto, so I learned some things.

Did I say that on here?

You might have. I don't know.

Maybe you or someone else.

I've done it. That's how I do it. It works.

Okay.

Well, there you go.

And I know the two-finger

squirt trick.

You do the come here, two fingers,

and you act like you're saying come here.

Okay. Good.

I know those things.

Good deal. Milkman, you got anything

Anything to add, any suggestions, things he needs to know?

Try the three-finger Freddy salute.

There you go.

The shocker.

All right, cool.

All right, there we are.

So all of a sudden here we've ended up with Tabachi.

Hi, Tabachi.

Yes, sir.

All right.

RBCP.

Hey, I'm just calling in to offer my deepest apologies for Tombstone.

He's my fault.

He's all right.

I don't mind Tombstone.

He calls a lot, and every time I hear him when he talks to me off the show

and then when he calls in your guys he's always like you know i want a girl i want a girlfriend

i want a girlfriend and i just understand what are we supposed to do to get him a girlfriend

it's an act he's trolling you i mean i love tombstone but you know quit quit trolling us

tombstone yeah tombstone get on get on ok cupid like a normal person and find a date

plenty of fish cupid plenty of fish and um there's one more what was it i don't know i think it's ok

Get on a paid one.

Get on Match.com or something.

Get on Ashley Madison.

Yeah, there you go.

That's all you really want, right?

I was actually looking up to subscribe

or attend local dating clubs

where they have meals

and you meet people once a week.

Okay.

I got that one for some Cougar network

or some Cougar hookup.

Cougar Life, right?

Cougar Life, I think.

It's the Ashley Madison guy

who made Cougar Life, yeah.

I think that website's a rip off

I don't know

I wouldn't know

so yeah

well there you go

um

you know also

if you go to the porno store

they got these little magazines

that are in plastic

um

I've just seen them

I don't know

Milkman what do you know

anything about those

swimmers magazines

the ones in a porno store

you know what I'm talking about

oh well those are usually like

no but there's always like

local women in them

that are looking for men

but you can't just

adult friends

but that shit costs money

oh god

like I mean

you just said you'd waste money

You just said you spend a lot of money, Tombstone.

I know, but not hourly.

I mean, on dates.

What's the difference?

You can also go to

literotica.com. I believe they have

something there.

Carlito, I'm going to let you go, but do you want me to send you

some Domino's numbers?

Yeah, send me those

I would like to

go into that.

the pizza people yeah do that i'll explain it but yeah do that brad sounds good i'll be watching

all right thanks buddy you go uh all right yeah yeah have a good show good good deal man brad is

talking to me earlier he's offline he's gonna uh talk uh you might hear from uh rbcp um about

getting the source i don't have the source for the actual logo that we use the fist like the

really good copy of it i can't find it anywhere but he wants to make some um p like pla you know

of the PLA buttons. He wants to make

some Madhouse ones. He's offering to make those, and

I wanted him to go through Tuck, because Tuck has the

source files of that, so

Tuck designed them. He's got

the PNG files. Tuck, you're there. Tuck's

here now. Tuck, did you hear what I was talking about right now?

Uh, some Ashley

Madison? No.

I was saying

that RBCP wants to make

some Madhouse

buttons, and I told

them to get with you, because you have the

You probably have the source file, the PNG for the Two-Fist logos.

I can't find them anywhere.

Yes. Oh, yeah. I have those.

Yeah. I told them that you'd be a better source to get them

because I can't seem to find the really big ones.

I just have the edited and the, you know.

So I told them to get with you for the nice TIFF file.

RBPP still needs to get with me about a certain art for a certain album cover.

Okay. Cool. There you go.

And so I'm going to say about that.

Sounds good.

And we got Crazy Cool Guy.

Who's Crazy Cool Guy?

I don't think I know you.

I'm sorry.

I got you on Facebook.

I'm a longtime listener of the show.

I see his picture, and he is a crazy fucking guy.

He's a question mark.

I don't know about the cool part yet.

I don't know.

Crazy is definitely spot on.

Yeah.

I've been listening to the show since 06.

Wow.

I got my girlfriend into the show

and I've been listening to the podcast

Your girlfriend was in the show?

No, on to the show

into the show

Put her on real quick though

So we can get her in the show

Yeah, let's talk to her

No, I'm kidding

You're going to lose them already

Well, I did like you

I'll tell you how fun I was

Alright, bye lady

Hey, sweetie.

How you doing?

Hello.

We're the Beatles.

It's a couple of the Beatles.

The Beatles?

Wow.

Nah, just looking forward to doing some pranks, man.

Let's do it.

You got any Greek restaurants?

No new sending in numbers.

Lonesome Loser's not around yet.

A little early for him still.

Any furry places?

We get what we get.

Listen, guys, settle down.

We got Shelby.

Her cell phone number, I've got it.

She's on Twitter.

She's friends with Riley Ewing

Riley Ewing

That's all I got

Nunu finds

He's got a search tool for Twitter

Where he finds when people tweet

Their cell phone numbers for some reason

I don't know why you would tweet your cell phone number

But it happens

So

Does anybody want to call her?

Crazy cool guy

Did you want to do a prank on her?

Her friend's name is Riley, right?

Her friend's name is Riley Ewing

Her name, we're calling Shelby

Shelby. Big Shelby.

Let's see if she answers. They don't always answer

when they come from Nunu. No offense to Nunu,

but I'm just saying. I'm getting a call filled

air. This might drop everybody out.

If it does, it's a real reconvene. Stand by.

Tombstone, we'll see if we can get you a girlfriend.

The number you have reached is not

in service. Well, there goes that.

There goes that. Thanks, Shelby,

and thank you, Nunu, also.

Yeah.

Instead, we'll call

Lauren, and we're supposed to ask her for

tickets to the Olympics, because she's in the UK.

Okay, the 2012 Olympics will be held in London this summer.

Does it say what she's competing in or what she's doing in the Olympics?

No, I don't know if she's even competing or we're just bothering her.

Okay.

I've got a feeling the UK Olympics are going to be the most boring in a while

when you compare them to the China ones, which were so freaking over the top.

Right.

God, it's going to be sad.

Whatever.

Poor London.

It's not their fault.

And then the Brazil ones are next

Which is going to be fucking crazy too

It's going to be freaking orgy

That's going to be

You want me to take this one?

Yeah

Lauren

Welcome to Orange Answer Phone

I'm sorry but the person you've called

Is not available

Please leave your message after the turn

Call was 25 cents a minute

And there you have a spanking

25.9 cents per minute

Bad boy

Naughty naughty boy

Talk about girl likes you man

Don't you

Looks good

got it living it up 420 posted a number the manager's name is ed i have no idea who ed is

doing or why he's the manager or something i'm gonna we're gonna complain ed tombstone you're

still with us buddy man yeah capital all right cool yeah we'll find you a girlfriend tonight

don't worry stay there shelby's number is out of service we'll find someone speaking

how may i take your order hi big girl how you doing hello is this for delivery or carry out

this is for ed oh ed where's he at oh okay hang on one second i'm sorry what was your name

Cherise?

Yeah, Cherise.

Cherise.

Okay, yeah.

One second, okay?

And I'll get him.

I can smell your cunt, Cherise.

Okay.

Right over her head.

Wow.

Who did that?

Sorry, that's my screen reader.

I'm kidding.

Your screen reader.

Oh, man.

You get the Carlos blindness, too?

Carlito blindness?

Yeah.

Oh, man.

Sorry, man.

We both know.

That's good.

Hello?

Ed?

Ed.

Come on, Ed.

Jeez.

It took me a second.

That's crazy.

What are you guys using?

Jaws over there?

Window Eyes.

Window Eyes?

Okay.

Jaws is a little expensive from what I understand.

Well, Window Eyes is too, but GW Micro has a payment plan that you can go on for like $30 a month.

And if you don't have the full $900, you can just pay $30 a month.

Yeah.

And it comes in installments.

It's pretty sweet.

Freedom Scientific's a ripoff.

Don't ever go with Jaws.

Yeah.

Is it?

Yeah, Jaws is expensive.

That's what I hear.

Everyone recommends it, but God, I looked into it.

Well, yeah, because it's the most widely used, but like I said, they don't offer any payment plans.

You could get a cracked copy, though.

Can you?

This cracked JAWS?

I didn't even think about looking for it.

Yeah, there is.

We're talking about screen reader softwares.

Being that I was visually impaired for a while, I did install JAWS, and then I just started using Windows and Arrayator, which really sucks, man.

Yeah.

Yeah, that program.

You could also get, what's that other free one?

NVDA.

That one's a better one if you're looking for a free one.

Okay.

I'll look into that.

Well, I don't need it really.

Well, hopefully I don't need to.

No.

God, I'm not even...

Well, if you know anyone that does, you know.

Yeah, well, I've got people in my family that are completely blind, so...

Get an Apple.

Yeah, really?

Is that for real?

Yeah.

Yeah?

Okay.

The voiceover is much more accessible.

The iPhone comes with it.

Yeah, you just flick it on and everything starts talking to you.

Yeah?

It's kind of insane, yeah.

No kidding.

It's kind of crazy.

Let me ask you this, because this person in my family who's blind, they were interested

in getting uh an iphone uh so they could text you know text people and i was like i don't know if

you could do that with you know i don't know because it's all touch but then i i saw uh what's

his face the the singer stevie wonder said he made it he said that he could text his son now

with an iphone what's you have an experience with the iphone being visually impaired i don't

personally but that's my next phone that i'm gonna get but we know like several people that

that are totally blind, and a couple people use these Bluetooth keyboards,

just so it takes away from the touchscreen part of it,

and then there's other people that we know that are totally blind

that use the actual touchscreen, so it can be done.

Okay.

It just takes time.

Okay.

This is an older person, so I'm kind of like their go-to techie person.

Yeah, I know why you're questioning that,

because the older people, then with technology in general, it's kind of –

There's a learning curve for sure, yeah.

There's also a software called Mobile Speak.

Mobile Speak, if you have a...

Windows phone or something.

Yeah.

What phones are they even accessible for, though, now?

Because my girlfriend just got her phone,

and she got it refurbished.

That was a Samsung Jack.

If you're with AT&T,

you can get Mobile Speak for about $79, I believe.

Okay.

It's a better deal than buying it from Code Factory directly.

Okay.

Okay, well, sounds good.

I'll make a nut of all that.

How you doing, buddy?

I'll do the research.

Hey, Milkman, how you doing?

I'm doing all right, man.

Milkman's being all for you.

Yeah, man, me too, man.

Slow, slow.

Fist bump, fist bump.

Fist bump, Milkman.

Yeah, I'll pan down.

Okay, buddy.

Masala can shake.

Hey, Milkman, how long is your hair these days?

Have you cut it?

You have never cut it, right, since we first started doing the show, have you?

I'm just curious.

Milkman?

I don't think he was talking to you.

I don't want to talk to Milkman.

Milkman!

It's nothing to eat.

Milkman!

Yeah!

Hey, when's the last time you cut your hair?

20 years.

20 years ago.

Wow.

And it's done this long on your back?

Oh, yeah.

It's long, dude.

It's like, it's just my knee armor.

How often do you wash?

How many, does it take a long time to wash?

Or do you have a technique that you do to speed it up?

No, if you wash it every day and you brush it and comb it, man, it's easy to take care of.

If you don't fucking let the shit hang and, you know, don't take care of it, then you

got, like, fucking dreads.

That's not cool.

Do you even trim, like, the dead ends, maybe,

you're renowned in, or you don't even...

I don't get dead ends, man.

You don't even bother that.

He puts mayonnaise in his hair.

She doesn't get that.

My hair is so thick, man.

I don't get dead ends.

Like, you take one strand of my hair,

it's like a guitar string, man,

a real thin guitar string.

It's raw.

Nice.

That's very nice.

Very sexy.

Do you tie it at all?

Do you have it, like, in a ponytail or anything?

Yeah, I keep it in a ponytail.

Most people don't know I got it, man.

It looks like I just pulled my hair back

and it's slicked back.

Do you have pattern baldness at all?

Do what?

Do you have pattern baldness at all?

Oh, yeah, yeah, of course.

I can know, man.

In the front?

Hell no.

I ain't no white boy.

I ain't no fucking white boy.

Like those samurai, the old samurai in the Japanese movie,

the old samurai that got the long hair going back tight,

but it's like they're going bald in the front.

They shaved their head because that's for a reason, man.

That's to show that they're committed, you know, in their whole bit, man.

I mean, like a religion.

Yeah, it's really a sort of thing.

That was shaved head, old school.

Okay, if you become like a monk or whatever, you shave your head.

And the samurais also shave their heads.

It's kind of like a monk or society, the samurais.

But just around the top part, they leave the rest of the hair, man.

That was a tradition.

Okay, sounds good.

Well, there you go, milkman and hair.

That's awesome.

Good on your hair.

All right, folks, just to let you all know, RBCP has sent in a number here.

uh well here here's what he's been doing recently this is ingenious and i can't believe he gets away

with it but it works uh the phone loosens will back me up on this to batch he dropped off but

it was on anyway uh so he calls in and says hey i'm calling from corporate um i need to you know

we're having a problem with our computer system can you let me know the last five people that

order pizzas we did this i think it was last the other night did you i was on them with them the

the other night and they did they did this and some idiot uh managed to give us 10 numbers wow

of the customers that they just had served in the last hour or whatever yeah yeah so i didn't make

deliveries to and so we just called uh uh people in the numbers and just you know prank called

their uh customers all right because they were stupid enough to give us the number okay all right

Here's the deal. He called in. He's got

six for this pizza

here. He's got six of their

most recent... Their six most recent

orders, deliveries, and

they're in the last stage of preparation

for the delivery, so we can call and

intercept these here. Let's go ahead

and call the first one. I got their order

here also. Wow, they gave

RBCP the order, the phone

number. Yeah.

There's a breach in security because

this is

is doing this.

So don't go to...

Let's not talk bad about them.

Let's just harass their customers, okay?

All right, let me make sure I got the right number here.

Paste it in and we'll dial it.

No, I don't.

Hey, Carlito, I want to tell you,

they only gave me the numbers.

I mean, I could get anything I want, I'm sure,

because they're retarded,

but you put the phone number into .com.

They have a tracker,

and the tracker tells you who made the pizza in the oven,

and then it tells you who's out on delivery,

getting ready to bring the pizza to them

and it tells you their order

like everything they've ordered

so you can say hey this is Doug

I just delivered your pizza two minutes ago

and there's a problem or something

or I'm Doug I'm on the way

and when he gets there it's actually Doug

yeah you know exactly

what is

oh listen to this Carlito I told you the guy's name is Christopher

that prepared it

the tracker just updated it says Tyler has left the store

with your order

Tyler just left

and he's on the way

to this guy's house

with the pizza.

Let's do it.

Alright, I got a plan.

This is scary.

Tyler, is this the building?

Do people want their pizza

or what?

You've reached George.

I'm sorry.

I missed your call.

Leave me a message.

George.

You got his pizza.

Now I got his name.

Alright, let me call him

from the Google.

Maybe it's because

it was blocked or whatever.

You know how it comes up.

So I will call him

from the Google voice line instead.

I think I'll get with you soon

About Google voice lines

And covering it into Skype

And all that

So I can start doing my own little things again

I'm all for that just no sexting man

Pull Leo man

Oh gosh

Can't believe Leo man

She's kind of cute actually

She's pretty cute

For him she's older

I just can't believe he was naked

I was thinking the same thing

You've reached Georgia

I'm sorry

I should keep bothering him and telling him

What the fuck are pants are

I'm Tyler

Alright well

He's just not there

Why would me

Why would they not answer

They can smell you

I guess so

They can smell you

Alright well pizza number two

Got the number here

they've ordered a large

hand-tossed pizza with pepperoni,

black olives, two-piece chocolates.

Chocolat?

Oh, it's like on the side.

Yeah, Athena and my nephews had that

and my nephews are five

and three.

And Athena had

a brilliant idea when we were babysitting.

Let's get the chocolate.

Oh, Jesus.

Oh, my God.

Of course.

They spent two hours

was crawling uh on the on uncle carlito's uh couch torturing him afterwards literally yes they

were taking their hands and and put it and i thought it was fun i'd go oh like they were

shocking me you know like they're electric electrocuting me or something but they kept

doing it they did it for about 90 minutes yeah yes yeah it quickly got really bad but like come

Come on, Uncle Carlos, stop doing this, man.

Oh, my God, you little shits.

You little bastards.

I wanted to go Frank Rizzo on them.

Get the hell out of the yard, you motherfuckers.

These fucking kids, you know that son of a bitch.

Get out of the yard, you son of a bitch.

If I come out here, I'll shoot you in the crotch, you motherfuckers.

You fuck.

What?

Yes, hello.

My name is Tyler.

I'm delivering your pizza.

pizza did you deliver order the pizza you have ordered a pizza from me hello yes do you hear me

yeah i can hear you i name my name is tyler i'll be delivering your pizza yes it's my cell phones

oh so i have you down here's one large piece us okay you have one large pizza with pepperoni

black olives that's right you have one two-piece chucks that's right and a 20 ounce bottle of

fruit beer right so for how many people is the pizzas and people it's for the pizza how many

people are eating this it's mine man by yourself yeah i hear talking in the background so it's only

one person's oh you're sure because there's a charge per person now yes it's five dollars per

person that i'm delivering to so how many how many people are inside the house the television

i'm in a hotel room okay and no one else is there with you i'm here would you mind if maybe i come

Come inside and check for you before.

Do you want pizzas or not?

Come

into the hotel room and search the hotel room to make

sure there's not someone else in here i guess that's what you gotta do i'm gonna search the

hotel rooms okay now i don't want any funny business either now this is a five dollar fee

That I'm charging on the side

Per person

If you want this pizza

You understand?

What?

And how long are you in this hotel room for?

I've been here for two months man

I work for Inc

You live in the hotel?

Yes

Why you don't have a house?

It has nothing to do with pizza

At all

For pizza

There's a different price

If we deliver to a hotel

There's a different price

Than to deliver to a house

Okay

It doesn't matter if I have a house or not

Because I'm going to have to charge you the hotel fee now

Yes

Cancel the order man

No no no

Cancel

No, we're not canceling anything, buddy.

Listen, what hotel is this?

Yes, ma'am.

What hotel is this, ma'am?

Ma'am?

Yes.

I sound like a chick to you?

I don't know.

I don't have...

I can't see you.

You're on the phone.

I'm being polite.

You're being polite, Peter.

You don't...

You said that you, you know, we're going to get there.

You're not going to pay us what you owe us.

And that's, you know, we could get...

What are you talking about?

I gave my credit card over the...

I ordered this online.

Well, you're going to get charged no matter what.

So do you want the pizza?

If you tell me to cancel the order, you're still getting charged.

And you're going to get charged a nuisance fee also.

A nuisance fee.

You're canceling the order when I'm on my way.

And being mean and nasty.

I'm going to call the store, okay?

No, no, no.

Please don't talk to my boss.

I'm sorry.

Please don't.

Okay?

It'll be my third strike.

I don't want to get in trouble, okay?

Hello, ma'am?

Oh, he's gone.

That's kind of weird.

I wish he knew what the manager's name was over there.

That's kind of cool.

So, yeah, that's fun.

of that's a warm-up any ideas there on the dais of what we could do with that that's kind of fun

just to tell them there's weird fees i think hotel fees tell them that they have to change the order

because they ran out of the other stuff you know the other toppings maybe yeah that could be

something like it's a little bit of trickery you know just a little bit of mischief there anybody

else milkman any ideas what would you what would you get upset about what if what if i asked what

What if I told him, you know, if he was an ethnic person, I told him there was a discount, you know, for if they're Hispanic or black.

And then when they admitted to be black, then I said that I was going to cancel the order based on their race or something like that.

You know, well, yeah, like, OK, for the black person, it's like a safety security purpose coming into a dangerous, dangerous neighborhood.

Yeah, I guess, you know, we've got this as a dangerous neighborhoods, you know, and we ran your credit.

So we're going to need a higher deposit on this pizza before we come out and deliver it.

Or you can tell, like, okay, drop me, like, you know.

Some good ideas.

Good ideas, guys.

It's too late now since it's after Christmas,

but I was thinking maybe there'd be some way to deliver a free pizza

since we have the name of the driver now.

And you get a girlfriend.

Yeah, maybe.

No, no, no.

But, like, you can call the store.

You already know the name of the driver.

Find out the driver's phone number.

or call him saying you're calling from corporate.

Tell him the PZ's on the house.

Okay.

And then start.

Okay.

You reached George.

Answer.

RBCP has not sent in a new number yet.

Carly, I was going to ask,

there's no more that are out for delivery right now,

but there's a couple pickup orders.

Do you want one of those?

Yeah, sure, yeah.

Pickup orders.

They've been picked up already.

Oh, they've been picked up already.

I mean, it's still fun.

Somebody on our show this week,

he's like, the lady was eating her pizza

he's like, ma'am your pizza has salmonella

you need to go to the hospital immediately

oh yeah, who's the idiot?

I don't know, I broke in immediately

ma'am, we're prank callers

and she was really awesome about it after, she laughed

that's horrible, dude

she was never so scared in her life, though

she had her little kid there eating with her

oh my god

I'm so glad I'm around to morally

that guy was banned from PLA

that's horrible

he apologized

apologize. Ma'am, you need to make your

child throw up right now.

Induce vomiting.

Put two fingers down his throat.

Sometimes I just wish I was prank net.

I did things like that.

Yeah, I know. We had no morals.

I was going to say, that sounds exactly like prank net.

Yeah, sounds like something they would do.

The kid was probably from prank net.

Listen, not that we're messing with prank net.

Alright, not that we want to start a

prank call war here or something.

Let's quickly give them free advertisement too.

Well, I know they monitor us too.

Good.

They probably do.

Tabach is a pregnant spy.

I understand.

Yeah, we know that.

No.

So is Tim.

Yeah, half y'all PLAs are spies.

Yeah, I'm right outside Cardio's house looking in the window.

I'm a spy in the house.

Hello?

Yes, hi.

Did you get an order from just a moment ago?

I did.

I did, yes.

How's the pizza taste?

It's done good.

You want a free pizza?

Pizza.

Well, you come back right now, and I'll give you the offer code.

You get one year of free pizza, free pizza every Friday.

One free large pizza and a free dessert and a 20-ounce bottle.

Empty offer.

Fortunately, I'm a...

Listen, every Friday you get a free large pizza, a free chocolate,

and a 20-ounce bottle of your choice of group beer, Diet Coke, or regular Coke.

All you have to do is come down and give the offer code.

To get the free pizza.

You come down and you say you spoke to me.

My name is Tyler, and you're redeeming your offer code.

I'll give you the offer code right now.

I'll give it to you over the phone.

You come in, and we'll give you the voucher.

Can you hang on just one second?

Okay.

Hang on.

Pizza every Friday from here on for a year.

Do you have any sort of credit card number or anything like that?

No, no.

You just have to sign because it's going to be for a commercial,

so you just have to sign for the appearance.

Yes.

When you walked into the building, you were on TV the whole time.

Yes.

You came in.

You got the hand-tossed pizza, large hand-tossed pizza,

Pizza, a whole, extra cheese, pepperoni, Italian sausage on the left side, black olives?

Yes.

Yeah.

Extra large pizza, rather.

Come back in, and we're going to do the reveal.

We just need you to sign a waiver for the commercial on TV.

It's a Super Bowl commercial.

Okay, tell you what.

We'll be back in about ten minutes.

Do you like football?

Love football.

Do you think you'd be able to head down to the Super Bowl?

Would you like tickets?

Sure.

Come on down.

Okay, we'll be back in just a few minutes.

Okay, we're going to...

Who's coming back?

Because you came in by yourself, right?

No, I had someone with me.

All right, so just the person that was with you.

Don't bring anybody else.

Okay.

All right, and have you sign the waiver, and then the cameras will come out.

Okay.

And you're going to the Super Bowl, and you got a free-eared pizza.

All right, ask for Tyler, okay?

Thank you, buddy.

Bye.

Super Bowl.

You sound excited.

Yeah, and I started thinking the Super Bowl thing would be funny if you think about that.

It's perfect timing.

You think, you know, now's a good time to film.

The playoffs start this weekend, right?

Playoffs?

You don't know, Tuck.

Tuck, you're all you.

No, this is when they're all doing Super Bowl promotions.

You already start seeing the Super Bowl logos on bags of chips.

Oh, that's how you know.

Yes, I know.

Like, that Super Bowl must be coming home.

We're going up.

It's on my coke can.

We got a Super Bowl logo.

Tuck, you watch Super Bowl, right, for the commercials?

Yeah, of course I watch Super Bowl.

You fast-forward through the game?

Yeah, fast-forward the game.

I'm sorry.

The game's unlatchable.

The game's just as unlatchable as that.

Oh, wait.

Carlito?

Yes, who?

You know that one guy you called in the hotel room?

We have his last name, right?

Couldn't we just avoid calling his personal phone and we can contact him through the hotel?

Yeah.

Well, I don't know what hotel he was in.

I asked him what hotel he was in.

He wouldn't tell me.

Did he tell you what hotel he was in?

No.

I tried to get that out of him.

There you are.

We don't have his last name, do we?

yeah and unfortunately the tracker does not tell what their address is that would be really nice

that'd be pretty scary i don't think i'm gonna order time soon they don't deliver to my house

anyway so i'll tell you what i only go to little caesars because i'm such a cheapskate i don't

want to pay for delivery charges there's nothing wrong with that five bucks large pizza pepperoni

they make it right it's ready when are you going so i want five five of them fuckers

and you know where they get you is that crazy bread um fucking crazy bread

it's awesome oh jesus i like to take the crazy bed i take that piece of wax paper and i i i

chew on it really yeah it has all the stuff still it's got all the orally parmesan uh yeah goodness

yeah and then you take a bunch of them and you throw them in your bed and roll around on them

right don't be silly in ecstasy

oh and i took it back in the in the mirror as a little fargic sort of sits to it

Carlito I sent you another

carry out are you tired of the ones that have been

delivered already you want me to call another one and get more

no I'm going to keep sending people there for football

tickets

alright well I've got three more then

alright cool I just sent you one

thanks man

I love that you're doing this you're awesome you're so much better than us

I'm in a weird mood tonight I'm not in a super

pranky mood but I'm you know

stay in the course as my eye doctor would say

stay in the course

our calls are just a complete piece of crap compared to yours

Oh, whatever.

Come on.

I mean, except we do the funny thing.

You should get the customer to stand outside and go to a random car.

Yeah, we just do salmonella.

You have reached the Sprint voice mailbox of...

Damn it.

Oh, yeah, that's right.

I'm doing it through Google Voice so it doesn't come blocked.

Hey, maybe we can check in with the first guy that we called, right?

Call his work or something.

Yeah.

I mean, if they were open.

Poor Tyler.

Tyler, he's finishing that one delivery to the car place,

and he's going to get back.

Like, you fucking what?

You give Super Bowl tickets?

What?

And you call the guy at the hotel?

Leave him alone.

Let's just get a reaction from this guy here.

All right, let's see.

I'm sure I've asked you before, but gentlemen around the table,

we'll start with Milkman.

Milkman, if you can hear me, out of the big three,

out of the big four, I guess,

what's your favorite of the chain pizzas?

Pizza Hut, Domino's, Little Caesars, or Papa John's?

meat eaters pizza

thin crust

I think thin crust is a rip off

why they charge you the same

as regular crust and it's thin

no thank you

it tastes so much better

if you get thick crust

I've been to New York many times

so I'm partial to New York pizza

thick pizza is real doughy

and chewy

I just don't like that much dough

I like more flavor

that pizza hut pan pizza has that nice butteriness

has to it. You squeeze it and the oil comes out.

It's so good. Get out of here.

I just got over the dough

thing, man. But, you know, everybody's got their preferences.

There you go. RBCP, you said what?

Little Caesars because they're cheap?

Yeah, Little Caesars. No thin crust.

Only thick crust. Gotcha.

Tuck, any suggestions out there?

Do you have pizza where you live? I'm trying to think.

I haven't done the takeout pizzas

in quite a while.

But I remember

we did Little Caesars

and Domino's a lot.

and uh so it was either those papa john's i can't remember if i liked it or not now i remember

getting it too all right i live out in the country so we get like homemade pizza at a store which is

so much better than that takeout shit there you go it really is you know so what's that one frozen

pizza that's supposed to be just like delivery dijorno there you go yes no it's not oh that

That reminds me.

That's a thing we were doing.

We were calling people and saying this is – oh, man.

We were telling them that they actually got a DiGiorno's pizza because our oven was broken or something.

Yeah.

Or we just went to the supermarket and gave them like one of those $2 pizzas out of the freezer.

Was this Tuesday?

Because I didn't hear that at all.

I heard you and Mr. Spess, I thought, on Tuesday.

It was several days before.

It was just an impromptu conference.

And then another thing we were calling, we were saying we were with the guy that delivered their pizza.

It wasn't a driver.

He was a driver, you know, in disguise, you know, trying to steal our business.

Yeah, the counterfeit pizza.

That was hilarious.

I really like that.

That was funny.

Yeah.

You're like, yeah, he's intercepting our calls.

That's what we did every Tuesday night, though.

That's what we do.

We may have.

I don't know.

I've done so many of these pizza calls.

Oh, right.

It's a blur.

Tabachi.

The whole week is a blur.

We did it Tuesday night.

Tabachi, what do you like out of the big chains?

Oh, man, I just, I try something every time.

I don't stick to one.

You got to keep your choices and horizons wide.

Can't burn yourself out out here.

No, and I usually go to the local small chains

Because I find the quality to be better

And you don't feel as sick afterwards

Well, yeah, exactly

Stay away from Cece's Pizza

Oh, Cece

No, that place I'd pig out at

Yeah, Cece's is good to pig out at

But, dude, it's the worst

But it's the few hours later when you're in the bathroom

Yeah, it's bad

I used to go there

That's where I used to play Magic the Gathering

With my old friends when I was in high school

I used to go there, Cece's, and play Magic the Gathering

and the manager

the manager said

it's too

it's cool if you want

to play your card game

here but on Saturdays

we're too busy

and you take up

like five tables

with your stupid game

please go away

that's what happened

we got kicked out

Tombstone

do you like Tombstone pizza

I'm guessing

do they even sell

Tombstone pizza anymore

I don't know

that'd be a good name

for it

like a Halloween special

shaped like a tombstone

have you ever heard

of Tombstone pizza

yeah I have

Tombstone just

doesn't even know

the name of Tombstone pizza

I don't

well

he doesn't know

that exist they used to be commercials and what do you want your tombstone yeah i want pepperoni

i want pepperoni like here you go like oh this is good look it up on youtube tombstone look up

tombstone pizza commercial youtube and see what i'm talking about okay i understand this is nothing

personal it's business before we get started what do you want in your tombstone pepperoni and

sausage joey tombstone pizza once you start thinking about new tombstone pizza's killer

sauce and real wisconsin cheese nothing else matters so what do you want on your tombstone

this is gonna make a big splash 90s time we don't um i don't know we have dominoes up here but

pizza pizza's okay i've never had a godfather's pizza republican black guy smiling pizza

and if you don't know what pizza pizza is i remember the uh godfather's commercial

Our call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system.

Yeah, Domino's had the Noid, Little Caesars had the Caesar guy, Pizza Hut, I don't know.

They didn't have anybody, did they?

They had the nice-breasted girl in the uniform.

Okay.

That was Pizza Hut.

Did they?

All right.

Yeah.

What other place besides Pizza Hut has stuffed crust?

None that I know of.

That's fucking perfect.

Well, DiGiorno's has stuffed crust.

I don't like it.

I think it ruins the crust.

It gives the crust a weird flavor.

I don't dig that, man.

If you look around, there's places in certain malls that do have the stuffed crust,

and some of them will even stuff them with pepperoni.

I'm not sure of the names of places, but I know they're around.

Sounds good.

I'll have to check that out.

I'll call around.

I don't know.

We shall see.

Hey.

Hey, Carlito, I thought I had it about the pizza.

Yes, Mikey129.

Go ahead.

I forgot you were here.

Go ahead, sir.

Of course.

How's my microphone sounding?

Yes.

Sounds good.

No gimmicks.

Give me a nice raw pizza.

Okay.

A raw pizza.

No cooks.

No nothing.

Just ingredients.

Keep it frozen.

Just give it to me raw.

He just gnaws on it like a graham cracker for an hour.

I remember the call, Carlito, that you did a couple years ago.

I just want a pizza, dough, and tomato sauce.

That's it.

Yeah.

There you go.

with the uh with the shredded cheese just coming off of it uh arty wants us to evil arty hey

whatever happened to him were you well i was wondering what happened last time we checked

with evil arty he was hiding out in his brother's backyard from the police because he almost killed

a girl yeah how did that how did that work out i don't know let's check in with him find out

oh fuck

I do know what's happened

there's been some

developments with that

story actually

let's get already

to talk about it though

let's get already

to talk very loud

and annoying

and make fart noises

yes please

only way I'll have

that's what this show needs

it's the only way

I'll have them in the air

oh keep in mind guys

I do work now

no three o'clock

in the morning shows

anymore

it's over

we're halfway through

11.30

what time is it

I'm blind

11.30 yes

he didn't answer

for him. He tried to call a few times and I

was forgetting to connect him. I posted

a Cheetos pizza link in the

Skype. Please leave your message for

Artie. Answer the phone.

I'll try them later. We have a Greek

restaurant. I'm sorry, Tuck, you were asking

saying something. I'm sorry, sir. I was

just saying I found a Cheetos pizza commercial

and I linked it in the

Skype chat here. Alright. Well, hey, breaking

news. Artie's calling in and on top

of that, we got a delivery.

Alright, from Brad. Awesome.

Let's get Artie here first. We gotta hurry on this.

Artie! How many turkeys did you eat?

Alright, I'll call you back. Artie called me in the middle

of the day while I was at work and said,

can I use the name horse in prank calls?

I was like...

Are you copyrighted now?

I'm like, yeah, sure, knock yourself out, kid.

It's great of commons.

I guess. He's like,

can I use the... yeah, whatever.

You're going to send your lawyers after him.

Yeah, I guess. What does he think is going to happen?

No, you bastard, it's mine.

I came up with that name horse.

We are into them.

That's my idea.

Horse.

Use pony.

That's gins.

All right.

So, Artie.

What's up, buddy?

How you doing, buddy?

Listen, I want to ask you some stuff, but before that, we need to call this real quick a pizza

delivery, okay?

I'm going to call it.

You stay on here.

A brewery?

Shut up is what it is.

A pizza delivery.

A brewery.

Did the cops come looking for you?

Tell me real quick.

No.

No?

Actually, did I tell you that she told me that the cops came for her?

Really?

To take the kids, right?

They came to check on the kids?

Well, no.

I found out they didn't.

She finally tells me, like, five days later, New Year's Eve.

Okay.

That the cops came looking for her at her house after it happened?

Yeah.

For what?

No, they didn't, though.

Oh, they didn't?

She was playing a joke on me.

That's fucked up.

She got you.

That'll teach you.

Dating girls online.

Tombstone, you see?

Now, how is it that evil Artie can find girls all the time?

Tombstone's here begging for us to find him a girlfriend.

I don't understand.

they need to swap

notes

let tombstone copy your notes

I was listening there

talking about getting him on okcupid

that's where I meet up

these chicks

there you go

I'll just screw it up

fuck up chicks

and give them fake information

screw shit up

it's perfect for tombstone

it's exactly what you need

you're a sunny boy

Tombstone, go ahead.

I take my time.

Like, the first girl I had sex with, I met on Craigslist.

You do?

Yeah, already do.

He lost his virginity to a girl on Craigslist.

He paid for it.

And it took a year to actually happen.

And it paid off really well.

Like, you know, friends, and then boom, done.

Boom, done.

I can't do that shit anymore.

It just has to be, you know, relationship first.

like i can't be friends because i'm like the friend zone magnet i can't do it you got to be

mean you can't be nice friends with benefits already i'll teach you you already need to

compare notes like tuck said that then you'll be okay are you serious i know girls man but like

yeah when girls talk to you about their problems boom you're automatically in a friend zone you

gotta get out you gotta act like you don't care and then they're like oh okay well they get it

Then they want you more.

That's how I got Athena.

Mine just got a boyfriend, though.

Let's see how that goes.

Oh, boy.

Already.

I don't...

She always says never again, then.

My dick.

Classy.

Very classy.

Classy girl.

Okay, Cupid.

There you go.

All right, let's be quiet while we do this call.

While I do this call.

Beep.

Reach the sprint.

Come on.

I'll call it back.

This account is already active in restricted mode.

Goodbye.

What the fuck is active restricted mode?

What are we talking about, bitch?

Stricted mode?

Since this is your first time calling Google Voice.

It is not.

Call Google Voice is not my first time.

Joe, Evil already is back.

Is it your first time?

There you go.

Oh, boy.

That's the way she said it.

That's the way she said it on Craigslist.

Is it your first time?

Are you up for more of the delivery ones?

Do you want me to call another one?

Yeah, totally, man.

Okay, all right.

I'm going to hang up with you and I'll...

It's only my first time.

See, this is why he gets

all the chicks. He's just a

brash asshole.

Brandy, you're killing me, Brandy. Come on.

You want a pizza? You want a pizza?

I should

talk like, you know, Mario.

Super Mario.

You want a pizza?

Hey, a pizza.

You want a pizza?

Hey, it's a lie.

Hey, check off on the...

I'm checking off on the pizza

I wish to fire an attack off

You've reached Brandy

I can't get to the phone

I don't know you know I've never tried

Rolling up a pizza on my dick

It might be good

Oh Brandy

I'm a little high

But um

I almost got a nurse to blow me

While she was taking my blood

What? To blow you?

Yeah I probably could've

Okay seriously guys

Guys, guys, guys, how many think he's just full of shit, or how many think this actually is able to happen to him, strangely happens to him?

Who believes?

I went back and got the bowl, too.

Did you get it?

Did you find it?

Yeah, I jumped the fence, and I actually bruised myself coming down.

You jumped the fence already, really?

You jumped the fence?

You went around the fence.

What did you do?

I went and found the bowl.

I actually went under the fence first.

Okay.

Crawling around that fence.

At first you jumped the fence.

Now you went under the fence.

No, I went under the fence in, and then to get out I jumped it.

This fence went up to what, your waist?

It probably went up to about six feet.

Oh, come on, dude.

You did not jump that fence, Artie.

No, it was because there was a support thing halfway through that I got my feet up on.

I barely got over.

I don't know, man.

If you say so.

All right.

I'm down to 230

Okay well that's good

Good for you already

I'm happy

Let's see

That's a tombstone

You gotta lose some weight too

I don't

You know

Maybe that's what it is

Any comments on that tombstone

Okay

I have a challenge

I'm setting for myself Carlito

I just thought of this today

Okay

Remember all the chicks

Who'd be over in the past

Yes

Your mom

Fuck you

Okay

Oh yes

But anyways

The chick in Port Richey

The chick in Ormond

I think there's a couple others

I can't think of them right now

I'm making it a goal to get back in them.

Well, to get in them.

To get back at them.

Yeah, just fuck them.

If they fuck me.

And get them pregnant.

Good luck, Artie.

Good luck.

And

get them pregnant. I think I can.

Hello? Hello? Yes, hi.

Who is this? I'm with the pizza.

Yeah, I already got my pizza. Yeah,

well, we're calling about that. You got

the wrong pizza. Oh, I did?

The pizza you got there isn't the pizza

you... Did you eat that pizza already? I'm sorry?

Did you eat your eight-piece barbecue wings and one ranch, one small, 10-inch thin pizza with hams, mushroom, and shredded provolone cheese?

Did you eat that?

Did you eat this?

Hello, sir?

Hello?

I'm going to end the phone call.

I'm going to hang up.

She's like, ah!

You've reached Brandy.

I can't get to the phone.

It was Brandy calling back.

I didn't know.

I thought it was the number I was dialing.

That's why I said get her pregnant.

Artie, don't do that, man.

Okay?

We got a number here coming in.

Don't do what?

rbcp sent in a new one a delivery adam just put it in the oven but he says that they caught him

they busted him in the act apparently i don't know what the story what that is but that doesn't

sound good uh yeah probably caught giving out phone numbers that doesn't it says some guy took

the phone from jerry and said don't give him any numbers good good brad good good work brad

that's funny don't give him any numbers you think well there's at least there's one

Manager's got half a fucking brain

Listeners we got

We got 101 listeners

Thanks everybody

Can't come to the phone right now

So leave me a message

And I will return your call

Please record your message

When you have finished recording

You may hang up

Or press 1 for more options

Yes hello ma'am

This is Cross

I'm calling from the pizza

There's a problem with your order

We need you to call back as soon as possible

If you want this pizza

Please call me back

I'd appreciate it

The number here is

Okay we got another pizza here

Let's see

Lonesome losers

For what

I just went to a physical

At the doctor

And he sexually molested me

Grabbed my penis

Always grab your penis

And then he told me to bend over

No lie I'm like nah

Listen there was someone calling him

And because you guys were talking, I couldn't answer it.

Are you guys done now?

You done?

No.

I wish I can get a physical.

He said it'll only be 30 minutes.

Shut up.

Cough.

30 minutes.

Hello?

Now, so leave me a message, and I will...

And I will...

All right.

Anyway, other number.

Pizza number two.

Delivery that has already been delivered.

Boo.

I don't know if they have it everywhere, but they've got a Philly cheesesteak pizza

around here.

That's good.

I'm with the pizza.

Hi.

What happened?

You hung up on me?

What?

No, I didn't hang up on you.

You made an order for a pizza, correct?

Yes.

Do you have your pizza yet?

No.

Okay.

This is a delivery order, I understand.

Yes.

Okay.

According to the computers, the address that you're getting a pizza from, delivered to,

we're going to be, pizza's on the way already, but the location you're getting a pizza to

is in a high-risk area, high-risk delivery?

Uh-huh.

You live in a bad place?

Not that I know of.

Well, it's a high-risk delivery area, so there's actually an extra deposit on that.

I think so.

I don't think so.

Well, we've already put a hold on the credit card.

It's a $30 deposit.

This will be released after the pizza is delivered to your home.

No, I don't want your pizza then.

You're out of your mind.

We've had it delivered here before, and they've never said anything like that to me before, ever.

Well, we've had some issues with the people, you people, okay?

Us?

Yes, you people.

You know what I mean by you people in this neighborhood where you live.

What do you mean?

What does you people mean?

Well, for lack of a better term, white trash.

You're calling us white trash?

You little mother fuckers.

I'm going to be down at that store.

I don't know who you think you're talking to, but we have had pizza delivered here I don't know how many times.

We just moved here.

I don't know who you think you're talking to.

I want to talk to your manager right now.

You little bitch.

You guys are fucking done.

Where's the manager?

Don't you dare talk to me like that.

I'm going to make sure you...

Where is the manager?

I want to talk to the manager now.

No, I am the manager.

I'm the owner of the store.

You run that store and you talk to people like this?

You actually called us.

You can't deliver here because we're in a high-risk neighborhood?

No, listen, we can deliver, goddammit.

We can deliver the pizza, but we have already placed...

I'm required to let you know that we've placed a deposit on your card,

an extra hold, $30.

and it'll lift as soon as the pizza gets delivered we'll take it right out i don't want to well it's

already on the way and then and then listen listen to me then then the 30 deposit stays on and and

the price of the pizza then the 30 deposit stays it this is exactly what happens in your neighborhood

you white trash people you order a pizza like a joke and then you tell our driver oh no we didn't

order a pizza and then no we don't want the pizza and then what happens pizza sits on the floor 30

$30 we're taking out.

We're holding this for you, ma'am.

We're going to keep the $30.

You have got grace.

We're sick and tired.

I had you guys come to the door, and you were so not.

You're being kind of rude.

What's with the woman in the background there who's yelling?

That's.

He said, well, let it.

Tell him.

You cannot.

My mission.

It's already done.

You did it already?

Well, you accepted to the terms, but as soon as that delivery driver leaves.

I didn't accept to no terms.

Listen.

I had to get my home.

If you look at the back of your credit card, it says we can...

Read the fine print on the back of the card that you put this purchase on and deposit.

Read the fine print.

Is the delivery driver there?

You brain...

Well, I'm...

It's...

Lady, what's your problem?

You're going to bounce a check or something?

You don't have enough money?

What's the matter?

I just...

Release it as soon as the driver gets back safely from your bad neighborhood, we'll release

the hold.

We've had a bad history with the people that live at this address, and that's why I had

to do this.

What?

Place a $30...

Dude, we know that you guys are messing with someone over here.

We're going to call the cops.

You can't.

Someone else is crazy.

We had to put a deposit because it's a bad neighborhood.

No.

I don't have any clues to what you're talking about.

Oh, this must be a misunderstanding then.

It better be a misunderstanding, dude, or you're going to jail.

I didn't threaten anybody.

I just told them about the $30 nuisance.

Dude, you are not my boss.

I work at that.

You are not the boss.

Well, I'm taking...

Hang the phone up.

Hang up now.

Hang up.

Did you receive the $30 charge?

What?

I commanded you to hang up the phone.

I ain't got the...

That got really bad, really fast, man.

What was his problem?

Or awesome, really fast.

I mean, if he would actually accept you to live as a piece of him,

then you are gone.

Come on.

Holy shit.

Okay.

That's what we live for.

There you go.

Living the dream.

Wow.

What a mess.

And I think the guy was yelling at him first.

He's giving him shit, like,

I made my charm at $30.

i didn't do it they're calling they're calling people all right they're probably poor says

friday night cranks friday night cranks what's that about you know that's not that's not friday

night cranks yo i know it's not that's friday night cranks with some guy and his cousin incest

machine oh that's cool i know you wow how did i call the third harm ranger no i just called to

to say that uh thank you eric verducci i did i just called to say there was a 30 fee and she

went off on me i didn't do nothing wrong tavachi says it's time to call the store i don't have the

store number brad's the one that's been calling the store who takes the hit on that is it brad

for calling and finagling the numbers is it me for yeah calling for the fees let's let's put it

on brad brad this is charm on them and they give them numbers when they call me like i'm brad

I hung up on Evil already because he's making a note.

He started butting in.

Oh, boy.

All right, Brett's in.

Here's the number if you want to call back later and see what kind of...

I think I'm just going to let that one sit for a little while.

You could play dumb and say,

I just ordered a pizza from you and I got a call from your driver

for a second. I'm going to get a free pizza.

He came back like one of the victims.

Well, the first one, wait a minute.

The first one, he sent the number for the first one.

That's where we sent the Super Bowl tickets.

The guy for the Super Bowl tickets.

That's kind of funny. Some guy's showing up

the other way for the Super Bowl tickets.

Didn't I tell him I had to give him a code? He never got the code

from me, the dumbass. I should call him back

too about that. He didn't ask for the code.

We didn't know what you were talking about.

Okay. Well,

I don't think we'll take our break

tonight i think we'll just go straight straight through one more hour or so i had an hour i have

to sit and hold her pee because you don't want to take it you don't want to stop and take a break

you can get up and go i want to get up and go what do we have to have get a bottle because

everyone have all this and want to stop in the highway do you want to get up and go to the

toilet you can get up and go to the toilet man no one's telling you not to go get up and go to the

hey taylor hello hello oh my god hi we have another female on the line the first time there's

two of them hi taylor hello how you doing cool laugh track matt's here there's someone for uh

you to get on a date with yeah yeah uh come on taylor yo matt matt she's 15 exactly that's

awesome right up my alley he could sense it he could smell it he knows all right i think we got

a voicemail here hang on let's listen this might be the police about the pizza oh it's two seconds

long it's just no it's just either about the poet no matt or arty it's uh two seconds three it's

just two seconds long i don't think it's it here's another one 22 seconds here we go then we got some

action transcription let me get the transcription first i'm curious transcription in progress

They're always, always completely

Wrong and weird and off

And there's another one

Alright, let's listen to this

So how are you crazy kids doing tonight?

You're such a fucking piece of shit

The police have been notified

You're such a fucking just pussbag

That's awesome, police have been notified

Love it

Alright, let's all listen

They're not the police, but they're just

Calling us the police have been notified

Listen, listen

They're letting you know

You're such a fucking piece of shit

the police have been notified you're such a fucking just pus bag of garbage that you would

just fucking try to hack in and people and steal fucking shit how fucking dare you you're a waste

of fucking carbon you douchebag fuck off it's a waste of carbon waste of carbon wow you're a waste

of carbon and hydrogen what is carbon what is a good use for carbon you inhale it they used to

put on a test in worksheets

at school that you wouldn't fail.

So you would take your test high and you'd always

fail it.

Back in the 80s.

This is carbon.

Alright, this is the guy.

Hello?

Yes, you called?

Are you the guy that just called me?

Well, you calling me. About my order

and the $30 charge?

Well, we dropped the charge. There was a

misunderstanding, apparently. Really?

Well, you know, it's funny because the guy just showed up at the door, and he says he doesn't know who the hell you are, and you don't work for him.

Just letting you know, I'm getting off the phone, and I'm contacting the police right now, and I'm going to give them your number.

And you are scum, and you are so going down for trying to hustle people.

I'll go down on you.

Hey, sweetheart.

What happened?

You what?

What did the lady say in the back?

I said I'll go down with you any day.

let's go down it tastes like shitty pizza but but i'm still down to lick it you seriously you guys

are the biggest losers ever i can't believe

okay actually you're the white trash buddy you are the white trash fucking color trash

you're not we're famous engineers you know what we did

You're fucking stuck in people's fucking money.

You're a fucking douchebag.

How big are your chances?

You're a fucking loser.

Are you a girl or a boy?

No, you're such garbage.

Are you a girl or a boy?

Go to fucking hell.

No, no, fuck you.

Fuck you.

You're some garbage.

If you can live with yourself, you actually think that's funny.

You have to take advantage of people.

How can you live with yourself?

I don't even understand how you can fucking live in the morning.

You think it's funny.

Fuck you.

Fucking, fucking.

How can you wake up in the morning and think it's okay to be satisfied?

Is it that you're upset?

I don't understand.

He's gone.

Is that the husband?

What kind of husband is that?

Wow.

That's crazy.

I think it's a marriage of convenience

because he didn't sound very heterosexual.

No, he didn't at all.

That's his beard.

He must be a doctor or something.

Politician.

I don't know.

All right, hang on.

It's definitely a boyfriend trying to show out

that he's a big Billy badass.

uh we got another question he should get a little bass in his voice before he tries it

all right they're not married gentlemen trying to show out listen yeah whoever's

the freaking number that's calling around trying to get credit card numbers from people that do

this number's going straight to the right authorities you know we're going to gum

ass fucking through this number you guys keep fucking with us the customers and that's exactly

what's good with credit card numbers i just told her we're putting a deposit 30 he said he said

He said the appropriate authorities, right?

The appropriate ones.

Not just the appropriate.

The appropriate authority.

Okay, I'll call you back.

Why didn't I think about that?

I forgot to tell my mom.

That's cool.

All right, we've got to call Evil Artie back for some reason or another.

So who's Taylor?

Is that a friend of yours?

Is that your daughter?

What's going on?

That's my friend.

Oh, that's your friend.

Okay, cool.

Hey, Taylor.

What's up?

Did you meet her on Plenty of Fish or something?

No.

What?

No.

Okay.

Kids with guns.

Oh.

What are you saying now?

You broke a pipe, a bowl, what?

No, not that.

That's a networking pipe.

It says broken pipe on stream period every five seconds.

Cool.

Who's Ariana?

Ariana's on video now.

All right, Ariana.

Ariana wants to share video.

Is she naked?

Not yet.

No.

Oh, my God.

What's the point?

You're not like 16, are you?

Is that another one of your friends, IG69?

Yeah.

Are you having all your little friends from high school call in?

That's cool.

Awesome.

Lonesome, don't get naked then.

Please don't.

You can have him turn it on here.

It ain't public on here.

All right, guys, listen, we got numbers to call, all right?

Lonesome loser, I sent the numbers very politely, and we have to call them.

A Greek cuisine, as a matter of fact.

Let's gravitate here into some more upper class prank calls.

If I remember correctly, the crazy...

Upper class.

Yes, crazy guy.

Is he still here?

Crazy guy, you want to call the Greek place?

Yeah.

There you go, man.

This is Macedonia Greek

Cuisine

It has oral, vegetal, and openings

Oh there's that

We're going to call the Turk also

Openings in the rear

Oh man, I'm working on cancelling it

There we go, I had frozen

Nunu was suggesting call pizza customers

Read the order and be like

Damn that's a lot of food

Tell them how many calories or fat in each thing

And ask if they are pregnant

Or something and say they will get fat and get sugar aids

And do another call

where you confirm order and then add sister

onto the end of the list.

I like that. Or add Indian food

onto the end. Very good, Nunu.

It's a good idea.

Good ideas from Nunu.

Nunu gets a gold star.

Good ideas.

I think that's Nunu's first gold star ever.

Nunu's been with us

in the beginning of the show and that's his first.

Not to worry there, crazy cool guy.

We got a Gyro Express.

Crazy Gyro Express.

That's great.

I forgot to play music here.

That freaking pizza call was crazy, man.

That was awesome.

Scouts are getting ready to take a shit.

Way too many people on there.

Ariana, I'm going to kill your video feed, Big Ariana,

because it might be hogging up too much of the bandwidth here,

and I don't think anything's coming through.

You guys see any video from Ariana?

I don't see any.

It's gone now.

It's gone now?

I did.

You did?

All right, cool.

Let's go.

Yeah.

That's a cute little brat combing her hair.

Aw, cool.

There is a really bad echo coming in.

I'm not getting it.

I'm not hearing it, sirs.

Lonesome Loser.

Are we calling Charlie this one?

Uh, what?

Are we what?

Are we calling Charlie?

Charlie?

Yeah, sure.

Always do, don't we?

I'll call Charlie.

That's the thing to do.

I love that Turkish restaurant that you guys went to.

I think he just...

I think that guy probably just left.

I waited too long.

Shit.

Jim got him going a couple weeks ago.

Yeah, I know.

How about any 24-hour jams?

I don't have any on hand, but our listeners.

Anything's good, though.

It doesn't have to be free.

It could be anything.

You can take any call.

Yeah.

I think my group video ran out.

I don't think I can do it anymore.

I only paid for a month.

It's a fucking $80.

Seven bucks for a video.

I don't know.

Yeah.

It's no seasonal, man.

Hello?

Yeah, Charlie.

What is it?

Hey, buddy.

It's Cross.

How you doing?

Your old friend.

Where's buddy?

This is Cross.

Ross, listen, I want to let you know you're up for prank call of 2011.

You're, like, our favorite prank call victim.

I don't know if you wanted to speak on your behalf, have people vote for you tonight or not.

No, no, I think that's the wrong number.

Well, we call you, right?

We mess with you.

We give you a hard time every week.

You know what I'm talking about?

No, he's like, I'm sorry, there's absolute chaos in the background.

I can't even tell.

I don't even know why I pick up the phone because it's, like, fucking pandemonium behind me always.

Long number.

Was that a cell?

Yeah, that's a cell.

We call a cell now.

We got a cell.

Already got it.

Evil Art, are you on here?

His wife just answers the other phone, right?

Yeah, his wife's a bitch.

Bangs on the fucking plates all the time.

Yeah.

Turkish Kitchen.

She's a cock blocker.

She is, man.

I'm going to get to the car.

What do you mean, Turkish Kitchen?

Hello, is the manager there?

Who's calling?

My name is Cross.

He's not here.

Okay, my name...

Do you want to leave a message for me?

No, my name is Mark.

Cross or Mark?

Mark.

Okay.

Do you want to leave a message to him?

No, I need to talk to him.

Okay, you can call later on.

He's not here.

Well, what did you ask who I was first?

Sorry?

What did you ask who I was first?

What do you mean?

You asked my name and then you said that he's not there.

I am asking you, do you want to leave a message to him?

Well, I'm asking a question first.

Why did you ask me my name and then say he's not there?

Why would you say he's not here?

I asked you, do you want to leave a message to him?

But what did you ask before that?

I did.

you asked my name before that yes i did why did you want to know my name first why that order

you want to leave a message to him or not well yes okay i have to ask you a question

are you okay or not no i need to talk to the manager he's not here all right take a message

okay yes tell me okay message begin the woman who answered the phone is not wearing any underwear

yeah that's good that's stupid that's stupid let's call back if he is there he'll might pick

up the second time why'd you call my wife how stupid he is there is bullshit i should not have

said cross yes i like that did you hear very point did you hear did you hear the message

so what's your position on that i called police and uh already what did they say what did they

say you already called them hello what did the police say she called them really fast yeah the

police put some underwear on why don't you put some underwear on you fucking mooch that's what

they said they're like she called yeah yeah people calling me hey shut the fuck up i got real

problems go away it's a fucking turk again complaining about the greek ah 12 11 we got

I've got about 40 minutes worth of, I'd say about 40, 50 maybe in me yet here still.

I do have a very responsible job I'm responsible for at work.

Oh, Jesus, really?

Yes.

God, what do you do without really saying what you do?

I can't.

I'm sure some of our smarter listeners have figured it out.

Alexis Restaurant, how may I help you?

Yes, Alexis Restaurant.

What kind of food, what kind of turkeys and food do you have there?

What kind of turkey?

Well, foods.

Do you have turkeys?

We have, yeah.

Yeah, well, we have Greek and American food.

Greek food.

That's beautiful.

I'd like to make an order.

Yes.

What would you like?

One order of baklava.

Uh-huh.

One order of malacca.

All right.

Huh?

This is cross.

I need one order of malacca, one order of pustis.

All right.

I've expunged, but then I don't want to find out that you're actually mistaken and you're an actual customer.

Well, I'm actually Turkish.

I'm from Turkey.

Okay.

And then I'm going to go there.

Sounds like an awesome prank call.

Is there Greek women there?

Is there a Greek woman there?

There's Greek women here.

Is there a Greek man?

I'll take that.

You will.

Don't you have a Greek man sitting next to you right now?

No, that's why I'm calling, to order one.

I said pustis, didn't I?

What?

I said pustis, right?

Yeah, you said pustis.

I'm on the line with all my Turkish friends.

We're going to come in there and we're going to take over the Greek restaurant.

Yeah, I highly doubt that.

I mean, you're going to try to steal our food.

We're going to steal your food.

We're going to rape all the men.

And we're going to keep the island of Cyprus outside.

Right.

Say hi, Turkish people.

Turkish.

Hey, man, if you're Turkish, we're going to kick your ass.

Oh, this is Vasili.

Okay.

Vasili.

That's me.

No, the other one.

Yeah.

I can't figure out this voice, though.

That's Vasili.

I'm Vasili.

What's up, dude?

I'm Nikos.

There's no Niko here, so.

I'm Niko.

Oh, you're Niko.

Yes.

Yo, I'm Vasili.

What's up?

And Gus is here.

Do you guys want anything?

Does Vasili want to talk to his papa?

Yes, put him on.

Does he want his papa to sing him a lullaby before he goes to bed?

Do you have any cute girls in the restaurant right now?

No, there's no...

Aren't you guys married?

Like, what are you doing right now?

We're bisexual.

We're in the hot tub prank calling people.

That's a prank calling a Greek restaurant.

Wow.

I really hope I get married in the future.

Can you put Vasili's dad on the phone?

What?

Can you put Vasili's dad on the phone?

He's not here.

Oh, man.

Big waste of time.

Take it easy, buddy.

Good night.

What the hell was that about?

Okay.

He figured out who we were.

He had a nice time.

Yeah.

I was listening to a replay of Madhouse.

I was playing him on Winamp at random.

And I heard one where I didn't really catch it until recently.

i didn't know that we i prank called some pizza place in california and it was the first time

nunu had this thing where he was like you need to call and tell people a long order at the end

yelled the top of your lungs i want some shit to drink and i said he kept telling me for like a

month i said all right fine i'll do it so i i did it and at the end i'm like and some shit to drink

he's like okay like it didn't work it's like who is this and i said this is valente and he goes

was carlito he said like i'm like yeah he goes oh hey man what's up i thought it was you guys

i'm like okay and he hung up i was like he said i gotta go bye and he hung up i'm like wait a

minute and i just realized like that's i think that was a that was the first time it's like we

were prank calling someone legit and like they actually recognized man like they recognized me

it's kind of weird i think i remember that episode that was one of the older ones yeah

that was really old and i never it never caught on to me until i heard that replay and the guy

I don't know why I didn't make a deal about it when it happened.

Hey, I got a question for you real quick, if you don't mind.

Yes.

On the intro of the show, you always play that,

who the fuck is this?

Motherfucker, who is this?

And you got all the people laughing in the background.

Where did that come from?

That's a Reclude prank call.

That's me and Reclude.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's Reclude.

Reclude was on drunk, and he said that he could do any prank call character

that KDK does but better.

and so he called and he was doing a kdk voice to adolphus cotton i think was that everyone used to

call that guy yeah well we we kept calling he would never pick up again it was always his wife

but the first call we got through to adolphus cotton and uh he was like very angry angry black

he said he had a big black gun yeah he's like i got a big black gun yeah that's him i remember

I remember when Katie Cake called him at Joe Rosenthal and told his son that she was involved with his mom.

You see?

That's Nunu giving out our numbers, man.

That's Nunu again.

That was back in 06.

Yeah.

Nunu's got this thing.

We do the pranks first.

Cross pollinations.

Yeah.

Then Nunu gives out the numbers to other people and then we want to call them and it's like, come on, man.

Anyway, hey, Laugh Track Matter, any of the Phone Loser representatives.

Presentatives, what's on deck this weekend on Phone Losers, on Cacti Radio?

What is the weekend schedule?

I want to know.

Is it set?

Are there shows?

There's no Friday show, really, anymore, is there?

Any back?

Huh?

No?

No Friday show?

Matt, are you on here still?

Laffy.

I'm still here.

Roxy Quitter's show.

Yeah.

But Rob the Hyena still does his, I believe.

Saturday, right?

Nick Badfish does his show on Friday

or is that just sometimes?

Sometimes. I don't know. I never heard it live.

I just caught it on the feed sometimes.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. That reminds me

I wanted to mention congratulations to

Lonesome Loser who won

the championship game

in our Madhouse Fantasy Football League.

He beat

Eric. I came in fourth

place. Third place

was another listener.

Let's see.

Andy came in next to last.

Evil Artie.

Is he on?

Artie, what place did you come in, Evil Artie?

Did you win in the playoffs?

I think I may have been next to last.

No.

No, Andy was next to last.

Andy played East Dog, and East Dog didn't participate.

Tabachi.

Yo, I thought I'd speak up on the Cacti Radio.

Yes.

Question your pose.

Please.

There are occasional Friday shows, but you have to pay attention to the feed sometimes.

You have to pay?

They don't have to often.

Saturday's shows are on hiatus

because Rob is kind of

taking a break from them so

we'll probably see more in the future

from him

so yeah not for a while probably

I don't want to have to pay though

pay attention

oh so it wasn't paying attention

you were paying attention so you didn't catch that part

alright okay cool

alright well here we are

moving right along let's continue with our prank calls

oh Brad is asking

I was asking if I wanted him to do more.

I didn't catch that.

Yes.

Yeah, we'll do some more of those.

Those are fun.

Yeah, man, that was great earlier.

You really rocked the house.

I can't believe that, man.

I just want to...

The first thing I'm going to do when the show's over here at 1 o'clock is I'm going to listen to that.

I'm going to listen to the archive recording and listen to that shit.

Okay.

Nick Walters is on the line.

Hey, Nick.

Yeah, I thought I'd call in and say that, yeah, I do a Friday show, 10 p.m. Central.

There you go.

Oh, Nick Badfish will be doing a show.

Do we need to play?

You're the same Nick Fish that was in the Fantasy Football League, right?

No, no, I wasn't.

Who's the other Nick Fish?

There's two Nick Fishes.

God damn it.

Damn it.

I don't know what girls are in here.

All right.

Yeah, girls.

We like girls.

Did you beat a stage in Angry Birds, little girl?

I'm not little.

Okay.

Do you play Angry Birds?

Could you play a little for Matt?

Do you play Angry Birds, lady?

No, because I suck at it.

You suck at it?

Oh, okay.

Totally.

Could you play a little girl for Matt?

That's fucking stupid.

I hear you.

I don't know how to play.

I'm not very good.

Aw, that's okay.

He'll teach you.

What do you think about...

We got our friend Tombstone.

He's single, you know, maybe.

You too.

He's 20.

I'll teach you how to play some Angry Birds.

Come over here.

All right.

We got a big conference here.

God, how many people?

One, two, three, four, five.

Way too many.

Five times two.

What's that?

Ten.

Jesus.

What's going on, Carlito?

Hey, Big Ken.

Kenneth, what's the frequency?

Hey, when you get another delivery for a pizza, what you need to do is give them a call and

tell them you were on the way to deliver the pizza, but you crashed your car.

And so now the people are responsible for getting your car repaired.

I'm going to ask them for their insurance information

Because I crashed it

That's awesome

Write that down on the big board, Kent, please

Hey Carlito

I sent you a twit picture

Of that heavily obese woman

I'll put it up in the chat room

Jack Masterson's wife

Do it

I need to play hearts

Pauline, heaviest woman alive

Now wants help

Wow, yeah, she's pretty heavy

Is she American?

Pauline says everything in life is difficult at my size.

I'll tell you what, lady.

Damn it, I lost.

Okay, I'm done.

What are you playing?

I'm playing Hearts.

Hearts?

What is that?

The card game?

Oh, that's an old game.

I lost.

Okay, whatever.

Dirty Aaron checking in.

Dirty Aaron, hello.

Hello, I'm here.

Hi, you're here.

All right, awesome.

In case anybody asks, you're here.

You made it.

Okay, let's do some more prank calls.

Come on.

Time is running out.

Now, Lonesome Loser has not sent in any numbers.

Lonesome Loser, shame on you.

I don't have any numbers.

Forget it.

We'll call the UK instead.

Robert Alderson.

Does anybody want to do this except for me?

Call it now.

I'll do it.

That person will do it.

Don't laugh, buddy boy.

Don't laugh, man.

Hello.

Your call cannot be taken at the moment, so please leave your message after the call.

That sucks.

We'll do another one then.

New news.

Flashing.

New news says, call my Angela doesn't drive.

Oh, Angela, yes, that's right.

That's the call.

Angela Stewart, she seems a little

crazy. If you caught the end

of our last show here, the Christmas show,

Jen said that she

cut him off, was it?

In the roundabout. My Angela doesn't

drive! Did Jen ever do

a show? Hello? Yeah.

Is Angela there? Hello?

Don't phone me no more!

Listen, Angela cut me off.

I'll go away. Okay, there you go.

Jen did not do a show.

No, we tried to get it together, but we never did.

Jin did not do his show.

I don't know what happened.

He was having some technical issues, I guess.

He tried to do the show last week.

He tried to do a substitute show.

Is that what happened?

Yeah, he couldn't ever get it together.

Couldn't get it going on.

All right, cool.

Well, we're standing by here for some more numbers from Lonesome Loser

and also from Brad, and he's trying to get some play nice.

In the meantime, we'll check your chat room.

where Nunu's pointing out that Nunu's Angela doesn't drive.

Okay.

I can call Walmart.

Walmart.

Okay.

We can do that.

We call Walmart.

Yeah, that's good.

Let me see.

Let me find a Walmart for you there, little girl.

Okay, bye.

Little lady.

What's your favorite subject in school?

Doing your nails.

I'm still out for one second.

Sorry.

You're going to have to call Walmart in Cali.

In where?

California.

In California.

Or Hawaii.

Hawaii.

We can call an Old Navy on New York.

They're probably closed.

Never mind.

I need tenure.

Okay, I got numbers.

You got numbers.

All right, share them.

Pass them on.

Dee Abbott in London, England.

Here we go.

Do you ever do prank calls with your girlfriends?

No, they keep laughing.

Yeah, okay.

They'll laugh.

They're never fun.

You ever have slumber parties?

Hey, Hermano.

Hey, little man.

I got a Walmart that's open, man.

I just left here at zero.

just call it out just call it out who cares it's okay what is it uh-huh can we send it to you or

read it to you just call it out what is it okay yeah the manager's robber y e nine i think he's

an african dude he's an african ask him why they're letting people have sex in the uh changing rooms

there all right are you in there now milkman is that what's going on i just left man i was in

in there but i just left oh mr no i can't go to walmart to get something to eat because they

close earlier you said that on the show recently yeah they did but this time thank you for calling

walmart how convenient are they having sex in the bathroom handicapped stall we'll find out i hope

so we'll see if we get tombstone hooked up here in walmart hello yes hello i had a problem there

inside the changing room i had to make a complaint i'm sorry sir there's a problem in the changing

changing room the fitting room you know where you get fitted hello hello boy we're dropping

packets like crazy i'm gonna have to call you back all right lady and she hung up we i think

we got way too many people in the skype conference and now phone calls aren't working we're gonna

have to drop some people arty are you still here we'll do a roll call get out of here dude arty

arty's gone or he's not talking already took too long okay you're here running from the law right

I'm running from the law. I'm going to get in trouble.

Dirty Aaron, are you still responding?

I'm still young here.

Crazy eco guy's still in here.

Alright.

What do I do then?

Hello?

I'm sorry.

I'll get you back on.

Sorry. Well, you should have been paying attention.

I'll call you back. Bye.

I'm not calling him back.

Alright. We'll try a call here real quick.

This is in the UK, I said, right?

D. Abbott. Well, that one didn't answer, but we got

That's Esco.

This one just came in here.

Milkman, you said Robert Wumanuna?

Was that the name in Walmart?

Wainaina.

What the hell?

Wainaina.

W-A-I-N-A-I-N-A.

Jeez.

I had to drop Ariana.

She's making too much noise.

He's an African-looking dude, man.

Sorry, Ariana.

I had to drop you.

Someone's calling.

Who's calling in?

Tombstone dropped at some point.

Tombstone isn't really doing anything for me, you know?

Yeah, Tombstone.

Hey, baby.

You know, you're not really doing anything.

You're not a real.

You're not really doing anything for me.

I need a girlfriend, man.

You're not doing anything for me, Tombstone.

I think I might drop you off.

I know, but I'm being quiet.

Thank you for calling Walmart.

You're using our precious resources.

Yes, hi.

I'm calling to speak.

Is Robert Wananaina there?

No, sir.

He's gone for the day.

Well, here's the problem.

I was in the fitting room, right?

Huh?

Okay.

I was changing clothes, and he came around.

and he's he uh put his hand under the the door who robert one and aina one moment please here

is the manager okay bye my cousin came in she sleeps in his room that's why i can't do a show

much later anyway after work but still anyway she's visiting for the holidays extended holiday

puerto ricans celebrate christmas until like february okay waiting on robert wine and i know

Milkman, go back in there.

Thank you for waiting to help me.

Yes, I was calling about a problem that I had in the fitting room.

Uh-huh.

What can I help you with?

I was changing my pants and socks.

Uh-huh.

And then this guy, Robert Wainainai, you know who I'm talking about?

Yeah.

He stuck his hand under the door.

Are you sure he did?

Yes, because I asked him who he was, and he told me his name.

He said his name was on the outside and everything.

Oh, okay.

Well, we can't go by the assumption that it could have been him.

well do you remember what time you were here it was earlier during the day okay if you can give

me a time and everything then i can run footage and see what's going on well i want to know what

what what the deal is he made like a fist with his hand hello he made a fist with his hand okay

well like i said i can't go off the assumptions of what you're here you're saying can i explain

what i have to say please you've already said it sir he made a fist with his hand and then he put

He put it under the door, and then he made the fist go back and forth.

Okay.

What does that mean?

What does it mean?

Well, you tell me.

What does it mean?

I have no idea, sir.

Like I said, if you can give me a time and specifics, I can go through the channels and see what I can get for you.

Well, here's what I found.

I did research.

I can't help you with anything.

I did research, okay?

And it said on this website.

Thank you.

Have a good night.

Hello, sir?

Please listen.

Please.

I didn't get to the part.

She knows what I mean.

I have four bucks, man.

That's like fucking Richmond's store, man.

That's probably a lot of bullshit.

Thank you for calling Walmart.

You know what it means, Milkman.

Good evening, Richmond.

Walmart may help you.

Listen, if someone makes a fist, right,

and puts it under the door in the fitting room.

Sir, I will not entertain this phone call.

That means that he wanted to touch.

Or you can go through the marketing office,

but I will not entertain your phone call.

He wanted to touch my penis.

Come on.

Listen to me and my penis joke

Thank you for calling Walmart

Change it up so you have a problem in the bathroom

Good evening, Richard, Walmart may help you

My penis, he wanted to touch my penis

Sir, I'm having this phone call traced

So if I were you, you better quit calling

What?

Because I've already traced it

Oh, where is it?

Just quit calling, they'll let you know

He meant

Now quit playing with the phone

He was trying to touch

There's something better to do

He wanted to touch the penis

Yeah, is there an American I can talk to?

Oh, man

Hang on

One more time

Carlito, do you want me to be your son?

That I can be like, I was in the fitting room with my dad.

Thank you for calling Walmart.

Say the same story.

Don't laugh.

PD.

Hello, ma'am.

Hello.

Is this Walmart?

Dumb PD.

Wow.

What a dumb bitch.

All right.

Lord Coe or Russ in the Olympics.

Nunu's saying this.

Get tickets for him.

Call him Lord Coe, even though it isn't him.

I don't know.

Lord Coe, Russ in the Olympics.

What are you talking about, Nunu?

What's Russ in the Olympics?

I farted in here and it smells bad

and my cousin's going to have to sleep in here

and the door's closed so the air can't get in

I keep it closed so the sound

from the living room doesn't get in

so it's probably going to smell real bad here

I'm just saying

thank you, good work, thank you sir

Nunu says

Carlos, check PMS

LOL, Ariana, PMS

any issues with that?

any thoughts? Taylor, Ariana

anything?

you think it's bullshit? I do

I think it's just an excuse.

Yeah.

I think it's disgusting.

Well, that's not the disgusting part.

That comes after.

That's just MS.

No.

I had a period on my bed and just started slowly pouring out.

Okay.

Thank you for the period talk.

You see now?

Why are you single?

I wonder why.

Because you're openly talking about periods.

Okay.

Continuing on.

12.35 in the AM 935 on the West Coast.

And this is Madhouse Radio for what it's worth.

Mikey129 dropping breaking news

About Michelle Bachman and Rick Santorum

Santorum joins Bachman

And pledges to ban porn same-sex marriages

Well, look at that

What a reach

Bachman did, yeah

She was the first one to drop out of the race

I could have sworn Rick

Well, Rick Perry

Apparently his staff was shocked

His staff didn't even think he was going to come out today

And say he was going to stick in there

Yeah, but basically

Basically, even Ty or Mitt Romney and Santorum, who surged late.

Santorum was like a nobody this whole time.

And all of a sudden, lately, he went on the...

I have no idea who that is.

He's a senator from Pennsylvania, I think.

He used to be, but...

He was a douchebag senator.

He was being on all the scams and shit that's been going on in the past.

That's why they threw him up there.

Well, apparently he went very negative against Newt Gingrich.

And he was able to pick up some momentum off of that.

Well, Newt Gingrich isn't it?

Newt Gingrich was crying last week.

He's like, oh, God, man.

It's like Christmas time makes me think of my mom.

Didn't New Jersey's mom say some racist stuff or some crazy shit once when he was Speaker of the House?

I kind of remember that.

Nudes?

No, I don't think so.

He got censored.

He got kicked out.

He was Speaker of the House and he got kicked out.

I was going to work for President.

He got censored by the Senate or whoever.

He's the guy that stopped all the government in the 90s, if you remember.

He's the guy who tried to impeach Clinton.

That's exactly who that fucker is.

And he's the one who did the moral thing for America deal.

The contract.

The contract with America that went nowhere.

Yeah, I remember that shit.

He got outed by his own party.

He did.

He did get outed by his own party.

I have a bridal store.

You got a what store, honey?

Bridal store.

A bridal store?

Okay.

Okay, where are you putting it, sweetie, honey?

Are you putting it in the chat here?

Yeah.

Okay, thank you.

Carlita wants a dress for me.

Yeah.

J-Man says he's from Massachusetts and Mitt Romney sucks.

All right, cool.

There you go.

I don't know.

He's a vital sport.

I hear him talking.

He sounds a lot like Ronald Reagan to me.

I don't know why.

It's not that I'm saying that I like him or anything.

It just sounds like Ronald Reagan talking.

I don't know if he does it on purpose.

He sounds like a young Ronald Reagan.

Just me.

Just saying.

Just an observation.

has a very Ronald Reagan-esque

speaking vernacular tone thing.

Okay.

Nunu corrects.

It says runs.

Lord Coe runs.

Okay, let's call this Lord Coe here

in the UK.

I think we already called

and didn't answer,

but I'll try it again.

Then we will call

Ken's number,

then we will call

What's-Her-Face's,

that girl's number,

bridal store.

Brad hasn't come through

with any pizza numbers yet.

Maybe they got them.

Hello?

Lord, may I speak with Coe, please?

Mr. Lord Coe?

yes my name is cross i'm from the united states right hold on my feet okay thank you lord co

how are you i'm good thank you very good listen i'm interested in some tickets to those olympics

i understand you're running them no i'm not well this is lord co in the united kingdom i called

the embassy and they told me to give you a call oh do you have is that your that friend of yours

uncle his name is sebastian okay not steven okay you put me through okay thanks can you put me

put me through please

this is Sebastian Coe I've got you down here

S. Coe

that's it you're still there

Mr. Coe Lord Coe

at least he explained it nice and polite

he's like no Sebastian Coe is who you are

not me you're silly

you're silly

I think I'm so used to hearing the UK

people get angry so I was expecting

him to do the same

Brad's asking is getting him is it too late no we got 20 minutes

it's up to show so we're good he's trying he's working on it awesome all right excuse me

surf ryanning fg i am too um i'm probably going to call in the evening and uh hi buddies.com

right all right took a mic.com took a mic.com hi buddies.com see you later buddy 100 uh strip 100

down monday really oh you're at 100 already yeah centennial special are you gonna anything big

Big plan in that?

Big rebel-y.

This is not going to be into webcomics for a while.

Okay.

There you go.

All right.

Love you.

Bye.

Tug.com.

Tug your titties.

There you go, girls.

Girls online, tug your titties.

Sorry, don't do that, please.

I didn't say that.

Why don't you have a seat over here?

Your call cannot be taken at the moment.

Please leave your message after the tone.

That's not going to work.

Apparently Diane Abbott is a politician in England

who made racist comments on Twitter today.

She's a big fat black lady apparently.

Okay, cool.

Awesome.

We have an email.

Let's see what that is.

Oh, we do have a request to prankster

that I haven't been working on.

Oh, shit.

Forgot that.

I got those at the very end.

Fear not.

Okay.

We'll get to the rest of those numbers

in a moment from Lonesome Loser

as we're winding things down.

Still waiting on numbers.

Hopefully that'll come in from Brad Carter

from another Domino's pizza machine.

In the meantime, I'm going to hop on over to the IRC,

to the Skype chat where I understand Ken

and this one girl here.

I forgot her name.

She gave us some numbers.

They gave us some numbers here.

Ken, what was your number now?

What did you say?

It was 24-hour Walmart.

24-hour Walmarts.

Good deal.

We'll talk about the secret sign.

I played that for my cousin.

I told her about the prank

whether Jack Masterson

was in the sauna and was trying to

find out what the secret sign was for gay

sex. She thought it was funny.

She thought it was funny.

I'm clicking on this thing that says

show I am and it doesn't come up.

Come on. Hide contacts.

Show contacts. Show I am.

Nothing. There we go.

It's starting to bother me too.

Gentleman's Club in Florida.

Geez, Ariana, I'm telling you. Look at you.

What did you learn about those?

She probably works there.

Hey, that's not nice.

Ken,

i don't see the number what happened here see ariana's number

There we go.

Is that it?

That's it.

Sorry for the silence, folks.

Let me fix that.

There we go.

Thank you for calling Walmart.

Walmart Supercenter, can I help you?

Hi, this is the Supercenter, right?

Yes.

Perfect.

Listen, I have a little bit of confusion here.

I was inside the fitting room.

Okay.

And a man made a fist with his hand, and he put it under the door of the fitting room.

Okay, when was this?

It was about in the afternoon.

The man put his fist under the door, and he made it go back and forth.

Okay.

so then i went on the internet okay and i put in walmart fist under the door and you won't believe

the dirty disgusting things that came up on the internet when i saw it okay they there was a man

they were showing on this video and he was inside a walmart store and the man was touching his

private parts and then he put his hand in in a bad place in the back like where you go to the

bathroom he was touching him back there and everything on this video is this what you people

will do there no now why did this person make a fist like that like they wanted to touch my

privates my private parts i really don't know sir well who was it then i don't know i don't even

know if it was a woman or a man i don't know either well would it was it you no do you know

someone who goes around doing that no i do not what do you think i should do well given that

You don't know if it was a man or a woman, and you can't, can you even tell me what they look like?

They, um, I can tell you what the hand looked like.

Well, that doesn't really help me.

Well, then I got on my knees, and I had my pants down, and then I can see, like, their mouth.

I could see the mouth.

It was a white person.

Okay.

Now, what I'm concerned with is this person was touching my private parts with their hand and their mouth.

Now, if I was a man, does that make me

a homosexual? Because now I don't understand.

You can talk to a manager.

Please. Okay, hold on.

Milkman, what'd you buy at the Walmart?

I went to the Beef Turkey and I made the pasta.

Okay. They had horse

flavored Beef Turkey too, man. I was

trying to try that. French.

Tell them you were just in there trying to buy some

ladies underwear and you get to put up with all this

shit. Well, I was trying on

baby suits without underwear on.

Dude, I like the fist thing, man. It's awesome.

How'd you like it, Milkman? In the meantime,

time we gotta we gotta deliver it's almost as good as the rubber fist okay remember in the uh

movie with uh borat he had the rubber fist yeah you mean that with rubber fist putting in my anus

was it good he's like uh yeah that's alan keys he did that to alan keys my god alan keys is like

yeah i think so bueno hello yes sir hello yes you made the order from pizza yeah my name is

of Shane. Okay. I'm delivering the pizza.

You're delivering the pizza? Uh-huh.

Pizza man just came. Well,

that's not the right pizza order. That's

why I'm calling. Oh, it's not the right pizza?

No. Don't eat that pizza,

please. That's not your property. Did you eat some

of that pizza? I don't know. I took a bite and

now I don't. You better not. You're gonna have

to pay double now. We're charging you for both.

Well, yeah. Yeah, that was the right order.

No, you are...

It's got you down here. Hand-tossed pizza

with extra cheese, pepperoni,

and a medium hand-tossed pizza

with Italian sausage and mushrooms?

Yeah.

Okay, yeah.

The pizza's...

The first one does not...

That's not an extra cheese pizza.

It's just pepperoni that you got.

And the other one is...

It's not...

It's spicy sausage and mushroom.

It's not Italian sausage and mushroom.

You have someone else's order.

We made a mistake.

What?

Well, we went to the wrong house.

But listen, if you eat some of that pizza,

you have to pay for this other pizza.

How's that gonna work?

Well, you're paying for this other pizza.

You said what now?

You're paying for this other pizza, damn it.

I said you're paying for this other pizza, damn it.

Damn it, huh?

Damn it.

All right, man, well, you have a good night, brother.

Listen.

No, no, fuck you.

We've got your information on file.

Well, I don't care, you know what I mean?

Fuck you.

I'm going to eat this motherfucking, what?

This is the problem with delivering to ethnic people

and to this bad neighborhood that you've got

and you start doing bad things, stealing pizza like you just did.

Well, I don't want motherfucking pizza, so fuck you.

You're not white, are you?

Hello?

Well, ain't nothing.

He wasn't white.

I know he wasn't.

What was that?

That was okay.

You know, I didn't catch it in time.

Brad sent in another one.

Has been delivered already.

Tell them you already delivered it, but on the way back to the shop, you crashed your car and do that whole thing.

Yeah.

Yeah, I was like, shit, I wanted to do the whole thing.

They've all been delivered already, though, I think.

Yeah, but tell them you were on the way back to the shop, so they're responsible for it.

Yeah.

Yeah, they all got there already.

Damn it.

Well, we'll call.

Hang on.

Here's another one.

Hand-tossed pizza with sliced Italian sausage.

That's what Artie keeps talking about that he wants.

Oh, I forgot to call Artie back.

Oh, shit.

He's going to be mad.

You have reached the Sprint Voice mailbox of...

Not good.

What's going on?

What's the noise?

Who's noising?

Oh, my God, Taylor.

Jeez.

Hey.

Calm down.

Oh, my God.

You guys can hear me.

No, we can hear you.

You just...

You laugh.

You're just like...

Anton, what are you doing?

Are you taking a shower?

What?

Tell me.

I want to know.

Oh, my God.

Sounds like you're calling from a bathroom.

I know.

I think she's taking a shit to the toilet.

Are you taking a shit, Taylor?

There you are.

She's like, uh-huh, how'd you know?

Go ahead.

Probably shit's real stinky.

Are you wiping?

Please respond.

She probably shit's real stinky.

She's doing the paperwork right now.

She's like, no, stupid, I'm done.

I'm waiting for this to connect here.

Just a moment, another pizza call.

Nini wants us to do his idea here.

Thank you for calling the Courier about Marriott.

This is Moe.

May I place you on hold for just a moment?

Big Moe, did you order a pizza?

No, I didn't.

Oh, who the hell ordered the pizza?

there i have no idea hold on one second okay are you ethnic what was that are you ethnic yeah what

ethnicity are you oh why did you need to know that well because i'm making a note here the person i

got the pizza delivery yeah that's not me okay so you have a boyfriend or girlfriend do you kiss

boys or girls he's going uh boys yeah i guess someone got it delivered to a hotel god what's

with the that's like the second one right where they're delivering their hotel hi hi yeah man dude

yeah i wanted to i read an article over the holidays uh in orlando i guess this is problem

all the disney area and universal studio area hotels uh apparently they've got a problem with

um people leaving pizza flyers everywhere and really shitty pizza like they it's apparently

like really bad pizza and they're run by like indians and they take forever to deliver and

sometimes they don't even come at all but they still charge your credit card and stuff like that

so they're i guess the cops are going after them and some one of these uh pizza they're not even

delivery guys like pizza flyer guys they go to hotels and start leaving them under doors and

stuff and uh i guess they got into an altercation and the cops shot them with some shit like

Like, he shot them and stuff.

I was like, wow, dude.

Yeah, it made Orlando news.

Yeah, there you go.

Chinese pizza delivery.

Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know.

No offense.

I don't think Indians can really make a pizza.

I'm just saying.

If I had a choice, somewhere to get pizza from, I don't know.

At least not with beef.

Every time that I've ordered pizza from a hotel, it's been out of, you know,

the hotels that I've been to, they always have their own, like,

the pizza place that they recommend.

Like, they have it inside the room.

Most of them are dominoes.

Some of them are pizza, but most are dominoes.

Yeah, but the hotel usually has their, you know, they got the little book in there with the local things in the area.

And they'll have, you know, we recommend this pizza place.

Or they usually have like, they'll have like a little tent thing.

You know, one side has like, you know, we have HBO.

And then the other side has like, you know, the pizza place to call.

That's who I'll call.

Or I'll look myself online, but I'm not going to go off for some flyer that I found outside.

side. Especially not in Orlando.

Jesus Christ. You don't know what you're getting.

Speaking of which, remember when they used to make a big deal

that hotels had HBO? They used to always

make a big deal about that. They're like, we have HBO!

No? You guys don't?

Milkman does, but he's Cena.

It's a great night here at the Best Western. This is Brandy.

How may I provide you with excellent service?

Ah, go to hell. Excuse me?

Go to hell. Hey, Brandy.

I just wanted to tell her to go to hell.

What's the hotel doing for me? Nothing.

I just wanted to tell her to go to hell.

Poor thing. She's being so nice.

Excuse me?

I don't know how.

Next one.

Getting ready to wrap up the show.

As soon as I run out of numbers,

you're going to wrap up the show.

We're doing rapid fire now.

Here we go.

Ariana, if you're listening,

I'm not going to call your Gentleman's Club.

Thank you for sending it,

but we don't call bars and Gentleman's Clubs

because it's too loud every time.

I'm sorry.

Besides, they probably expect prank calls.

Yeah, they do.

Well, thank you, though.

Well, we called Walmart.

more i think she's pretty cool for call engines this is josh um unable to get to my phone right

now go ahead and leave me a detailed message and i will get back to you as soon as i can

thanks and have a great day whatever and i think this is the last one pizza number six

see if this one goes down i'm a little bit of trouble with these there was so we've had two

good ones i think so far well three two and a half three two and three quarters good ones

it's one o'clock brad no more if you get any more send them in but don't confirm anyone

everyone else no more confirmations no more number submissions it's one o'clock we've hit

our operational limit here they call the same number again unable to get to my phone right now

all right everybody okay good all right just to be nice i'll call the uh last few numbers that

came in with brad says and he'll do those also but uh that's it in the meantime we got two

abbots here give them a call quickly these are both in the uk just wake them up and go

real quick and have fun if any of you guys on the line want to call them want to join in

you want to do it go ahead let me know let me get a chance are you guys that are connected even here

i know ig69 is paying attention i'm still here i'm still here it's good thank you i was in there

i think it's six abbott abbott mr abbott how are you good listen i need tickets for the olympics

this summer i was wondering if you could help me out my name is cross i'm an olympic huh i'm a

reporter i need tickets to the olympics you rang a private you rang a private number i know well

i'm calling from the united states and the embassy told me to give you a call to get tickets for the

olympics this year 2012 summer olympics in london but i'm just i'm just you know you've just oh is

there anybody else there just my wife uh can you put her on she's asleep well i'll like to wake her

up do you ever um go down on her to wake her up like you wake her up and you're licking her

or privates.

You're nasty.

I know.

That's why they like me.

The girls like that.

Have you tried it?

Try it now.

Let's listen.

I'm going to listen.

Bye-bye.

Come on.

Start kissing her down there.

Wake her up.

He's going to do it.

He hung up,

but he's going to do it.

He's thinking about it.

I would too.

I do that sometimes.

There you go.

You got to think about that.

Tombstone,

that's another thing

you need to do for the girls.

I only know one

Spanish pickup

for the girls.

Kita to Europa.

Abbott.

Hello?

Yes, hi.

Miss Abbott?

No.

Mr. Abbott?

Fuck was that?

I don't know.

No.

Okay.

Mr. Abbott can't answer.

He's down between the lanes getting business done.

We got two undelivered pizzas just came in from RBCP.

Let's give them a call.

First one, his delivery driver named Sergio is on his way to deliver a medium hand tossed pizza.

I can't believe Sergio wrecked his fucking car.

I was surprised they're going to be with Sergio shows up,

and they think he's expecting their insurance information.

All right, let's do some shit.

Let's do some drugs on the phone.

Let's do it.

Your caller ID is either being blocked or being deleted by your carrier.

Please arrange to have your number.

All right, fine.

I'll call from Google Voice and see if it works on that.

I was trying to Skype it.

Fuck.

That's fine.

It won't affect Google Voice.

Don't worry.

Hello, this is Sergio.

I'm calling from...

You making orders?

Yes.

Okay, we have a problem with the pizzas.

I'm the delivery.

I got into an accident on the way to your location with the pizzas.

Okay, so I'm going to need your insurance information, please.

What?

I need your insurance information because I got into an accident on my way to your house.

Hello?

Come on, man.

I got no insurance information.

Is that illegal?

I'm asking for insurance information.

I think not.

I'm not available.

Please leave your name and a brief message.

Phone number.

Big deal, big deal.

I guess I just came up a little too strong with the accent and sounded too fake.

Sorry.

Well, here's another one that's undelivered.

Yousef.

Thank you for calling.

If you know the room number of the guest you are trying to reach...

The fuck's working there?

Yeah, I know, right?

UK Ted's working there, apparently.

Slacker.

He's too busy doing prank calls.

Where's that guy?

Plonker.

I want to check in.

And three, and two, and one.

Nothing.

All right, sorry, buddy.

Couldn't do it.

It's okay.

All right, no problem.

Hotels don't like me either.

it yeah well they don't like me either you know i left uh blood on the mattress once yeah girl

blood not my fault anywho quick check of irc make sure everything there is copacetic looks okay to

me i'll sign off on that lonesome loser hasn't sent any more numbers we are in a clear avid is

a racist i don't care noo noo i wanted to talk about the olympics it was silly it was silly

mikey129 thank you for confirming everything's fine oh hey msg3 clay kokanee's in there on

an op what happened why is kokanee not got ops i thought i helped them anybody else want ops let

me know i'll give you ops in the chat room you guys can ban each other have fun it'd be silly

be silly ken wants ops here you go ken big ken you want ops you got it ken there you go mike you

want 21 you want ops or yeah i'll give msc3 clay ops usually helps out a lot hey someone remind me

me again who noonie was kicked by ken it's about time oh that's awesome rbcp says some lady was

on to him and gave him a bullshit number that's awesome okay we got two requests of pranks here

that we didn't get to they're probably stale by now like i like to say but i'll call them just in

case you never know request a prank submission number one came in from dustin quite a while ago

A number of Wisconsin

Do whatever you want

Okay, got it

Do whatever I want

Do whatever I want, he says

I have no idea

FBI Miami, coming up

The voice mailbox you have reached is full

A message cannot be recorded at this time

Oh, there you go, we did it

Mr. Popular

Tell me about it

Wow

And I think I had one more that came in here

Let me go back to the inbox and find out

This would be the last prank of the night

after this I'll be disconnecting

on all our guests except for Milkman

who will lead us out of here

get ready Milkman

you in Madhouse? I mean Carlito?

I need to talk to you after the show

for like one minute

I gotta go to sleep I gotta work

and actually it's the same number so never mind we're done

alright cool we're in the clear we're out of here

alright gentlemen thank you very much for joining in

this is the end of the line for Ken

bye Ken

see you later

take it easy

goodnight thank you

Who else we got here

IG69

You got anything to plug any websites

IG69.com

IG69

Thanks a lot man

Take it easy man

Hey man we gotta do some Battlefield 3

I gotcha

Yeah next time I'm online

This weekend I'll be on or something

Alright cool

Alright ladies

Ariana Huffington and Taylor

Big Taylor it's been fun

Nice talking to you pretty girls

Don't miss me too much

Bye

Crazy cool guy

And his girlfriend wife

It's been fun

Thanks for having us on

You've been a gentleman and a scholar

And your old lady too

It's been great

Thanks for listening for so long

Nice couple over there

Mikey129

See you later buddy

Bye

RBCP

Are you there still?

Any status?

Yeah.

Carlito, can we do just one more?

They just took the order.

It's not even in the oven yet.

Okay, yeah.

I got it here.

Do you got the order info or I got the number?

Yeah, I'll paste it to you.

All right, cool.

Last one.

Okay.

All right.

I really hope this one works because it sucks that those others didn't.

Well, they're in hotels, a lot of them, too, is the problem.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's too bad.

It's okay.

I need to call more urban, small town places.

High-risk neighborhood delivery areas.

Yes, high-risk.

point you're afraid to get out of your car high risk white trash trailer park areas yeah milkman

i wish you would have brought that up during that crazy call because i see when they ask you who is

this luis has started his order reese cow reese luis l-u-i let's see yes hello i'm calling from

pizza you placed the order yeah i wanted to confirm that hand tossed pizza pepperoni and

italian sausages huh what is what's the problem that wasn't what i ordered so what'd you order

um ordered that's like completely wrong i didn't have a handoff pizza with italian sausages no

no do you want one um now i gotta give it to you who is this what the hell this is louise i'm

calling from domino's pizza oh you're gonna give it to us for free well you messed up your order

so now i made a pizza that you're not gonna want apparently you people did it again no it didn't

what are you talking about i have it here you confirmed for a hand-tossed pizza pepperoni

italian sausage and now you don't want to pay for it no that's not what we ordered we ordered

um hand-tossed pepperoni and um bacon god damn it i've got but i've got italian sausage not bacon

No.

What?

What about the bread?

Is that you?

We didn't.

No.

You really messed up.

What's your name?

Jessica.

You really messed things up here for me, Jessica.

Let me tell you what.

So what do you got here?

One medium hand-tossed pizza with pepperoni and bacon.

No, we had two pizzas.

We also had eight.

So two medium hand-tossed pizzas with pepperoni and bacon.

No.

No, my God.

What the hell, dude?

I'm about to call back to the Domino's place because this is like a number, okay?

I don't even know where the hell you're at.

We're calling from...

Are you, like, playing a joke on me?

You made an order from pizza, God damn it.

Why?

Because you people keep basically messing up the orders, and then my driver gets out there.

You don't want to pay him for the food.

I'm not doing this anymore.

No.

It says one of them was double pepperonis with thin crust.

I mean, not pepperonis, double pineapple with thin crust.

The other one was...

pepperoni and bacon

and then we had

eight wings.

Alright, so I got

one medium

double pepperoni

thin crust and then one medium

one medium pepperoni

and bacon and eight wings.

One medium pepperoni

I mean double pineapple.

That's what I said at first.

One medium double pineapple

thin crust. Yeah.

And then one medium pepperoni with bacon.

and then eight wings and eight wings yes okay but now i also have this extra one medium

hand-tossed pepperoni italian sausage i have two of them that you said you ordered in red

i didn't just just tell me if you want to if you did a mistake if you want to cancel it just be

honest dude what the hell all right goodbye i'm calling back stupid what a disrespectful

That was amazing.

Oh, my God.

That is definitely the order that's on the website.

I think they're making the wrong stuff for her.

So we're probably doing her a favor.

Yeah, actually, we're probably helping her out.

We're fucking up her order all together.

Cool.

All right, well, there we go.

All right, Brad, I got to work tomorrow, man.

It's late.

Okay, all right.

Thanks a lot for doing all this.

That was really great.

Thanks for doing all the legwork.

I appreciate it, man.

Yeah, yeah, no problem.

We'll have to do this again.

We'll have to do it again sometime.

time all right take it easy man see ya see ya all right milkman it's time it's here sir it's time

take us out of here baby oh another effective call hey how you doing man hey man yeah yeah man

okay don't shut up yeah thank you to see you too man all right bro peace man uh larry see you

all right guys it was a friend of mine larry stop by larry yeah stupid name all right anyway

way, back to the show. Folks, here you have it, another fantastic installment of the Mad

House Live. It's our freaking crazy man here, Manito, man. I'd like to thank everybody for

helping out. RBC, Brad, whoever was sending us the pizza calls. Excellent calls, man.

Thank you so much. Nunu, some great ideas. Thank you so much. And I got another customer

customer here all right hi how you doing okay and i'd like to thank you hermanito so much

brother thank you all right thank you all right you gotta go all right yes sir all right well

i'll finish out thank you milkman i'll catch you later i'll try to call you as soon as i can the

weekend it's on right all right everybody well thank you for tuning in this has been manhouse

radio first show of the year july july january film thanks to everyone everyone who sent the

numbers rbcp for your help with a prank call so the pizza customers lonesome loser for all the

numbers you sent in new new as well a lot of people sent in ideas those two girls sent the

numbers big ken sent in the walmart we had fun with with the fist under the thing been a fun

time we had a good time here all our listeners and everyone we prank called especially uh the

crazy angry lady for the pizza legendary call we're starting out the new year with a blast and

And I appreciate it.

As I fish here for the end of show song.

Here we go.

All right, guys.

Catch you next week.

MadhouseLive.com is the website.

Take care.

Watch out for the podcast.

Thank you.

Bye.

Good night.

Came through to check y'all niggas.

You know, came to show some love.

I'm saying us niggas don't know how long we gonna be here.

Feel me?

Enjoy this shit and enjoy yourselves.

And then we out of here.

Sit.

Calls (28, 1 h 26 min of 3 h 4 min)

Transcript

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