Madhouse 1001305a

Our following is an exclusive of PCU Radio and MadhouseLive.com

What's up everybody? Good evening.

You're listening to the Madhouse as usual.

I'm your host Carlito here.

By myself in my place.

How do I say?

By myself in my apartment.

No Andy tonight.

Andy decided to take certain things, and he's not able to make it, apparently.

He's not going to be awake for very much longer.

But I do have the milkman on via satellite, I believe.

Sir, are you there?

Yeah, what's happening, Carlito?

Sorry, Andy's missing in action.

Well, yeah.

Hey, you know what?

He lives a crazy-ass life.

And, you know, I talked to him, and he sounded like he was asleep.

He was like, no, but I'm going to be asleep soon.

I was like, what'd you do?

He's like, yeah, you know, I did blah, blah, blah.

I was like, yeah, yeah.

You fucking traitor.

Athena's out with her girlfriends tonight at Universal Studios doing some bullshit,

and I didn't want to go because I don't want to do shit.

Hey, Milkman, check out this song here.

Have you heard this?

All right.

I hurt myself today to see if I still feel.

I focus on the pain, the only thing that's real.

That's Johnny Cash.

This is his last song that he released.

You've heard this, right?

I'm getting chills, man.

It's a damn good song.

Oh, man.

You could have it all.

I'll play the rest of that later.

That actually, you know, that is his last song that he recorded.

It is actually a Nine Inch Nails song, I believe.

Is that right?

By Trent Reznor.

Man, I got chills up and down my spine.

The man in black.

Rest in peace, Big John.

Yeah, he wrote that right at the end.

I think that was about two weeks before he died.

No, maybe not.

Maybe I'm exaggerating, but it's a really good deal.

He heard the song.

I guess he heard the Nine Inch Nails version of it

And decided to make a cover of it

Got permission from Trent Reznor

And yeah that's a badass song

I heard it

It is on the commercial for my favorite TV show

Which is The Shield

Which starts up again in January Season 5

Great one of the best shows

It is to me

It's the best show that's on now

It's not on now

The season ended in June

Season 5 starts on FX

When is it Tuesday nights Wednesday nights

I don't know what it's going to be.

But I just found out today Forrest Whitaker is going to be on that show this year.

They had Glenn Close on as a special guest all season.

And they had, who's the guy from Barbershop, the black dude?

I forget his name now.

He's in a bunch of black movies.

He was trying to steal the ATM at Barbershop.

I forgot his name now.

Oh, man.

Yeah.

I know you're talking about X not coming to me.

Yeah, he's pretty funny.

But, yeah, he was on it, too.

Anyway, I'm getting off track.

I'm going to send you a card number here.

Okay.

You know what?

I tested the one I have from last week, and I think I have about two hours left.

Okay.

Well, then, good.

I checked everything on here.

I've already been confirmed and stacked out of them, and we need to go through and get rid of as much as we can.

So, yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

They expire?

No.

No, I just hate having a bunch of open cards, because if I lose one, then I'm out.

Yeah.

Well, actually, the PCU's out, because that's the only thing I use them for.

Right.

I've got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven open cards.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

Yeah, well, hey, let me see.

How do I sound on your internet?

I think someone said the sound is a little low.

I think, I hope I'm okay.

The encoders are looking just a bit low.

Maybe if you bring up the overall.

I mean, in my phone, you sound good.

Yeah, it's coming up a little bit.

I adjust my level to what I hear.

All right.

But I can see the encoders are lagging there, and they're not really spiking at all.

It's kind of low.

Okay.

All right, well, I'll keep working on that.

Hang on, let me try to boost that a little bit here.

Boost it, boost it, boost it.

Boosty. I don't know.

It'll have to do. I'm sure I'll get it.

There it goes.

Another Boosty-ay. Oh my goodness.

Oh my god. No way.

So anyway, everybody, as I said, thank you for joining us.

It's 9.42. I only started about 10 minutes late today,

so thank you everybody for hanging in who wasn't.

I see the chat room is starting to fill up a bit.

We have the regular crowd is in there.

It's a little slower than normal, but I'm sure that'll pick up in a little bit.

it um if you're not in the chat room be sure to go to kdk prank calls.com and click on the chat

icon and browse around through kdk site who is um the uh the guru of pcu radio the brains behind

the talent what is it you call him uh milkman milkman he is the manner he is the cerebro of

the prank call yeah there you go there you go and you know i'm sad to report that i was i'm sad to

report i was monitoring the wikipedia page for kdk and it has been taking taken away it has

been deleted um for being inappropriate yeah very very very shitty situation and you can hear the

crowd is not very happy with that i guess they say he's not seeing the ass hat of whoever that

hater is yeah yeah you know who it is i'm not gonna say who it is but you know what can you do

and the booze just stop all of it is just the booze just stop all stop all inappropriately

Live in Folsom Prison is just a record all need to own.

That's very true, Tucker Mike.

And didn't I just play that?

That's in one of my promos, right?

Isn't it?

Let me see.

Maybe I didn't play it.

Did it play right now?

Take Your Pants Down.

Yeah, the Take Your Pants Down rejoin.

What the hell is that?

I guess I didn't play it then.

Huh.

I don't see it here.

Yeah, I didn't play that.

Yeah, I'll be...

Yeah, I have Tucker Mike, if you're listening.

I'm sure he's listening.

Yeah, keep listening.

You'll definitely hear Folsom Prison.

That's one of my rejoin songs.

That's usually my first rejoin of the night will be that one.

Anyway, shout out to Hayes because he wants me to shout him out.

So there you go.

Everybody in the chat room, we've got, I want to thank Boonie, Chainsaw,

DoubleD.Dead's in there, DTT, the super fan of PCU is in there, of course.

You've got Hayes, HomeworkGuy, who's a new person I've never seen before.

Jolt, who's one of those guys that I never see talk, but he's in there.

I wonder who that is, seriously.

So we've got quite a few people that are just on Madman's server.

And they're logged into, like, Illinois and some of the other rooms.

And they just stay logged just about everywhere on the server.

That's why there's a bunch of unexplained names that are on there, like, year-round.

Spoonjabob and all those.

Okay, well, that explains a lot.

I don't think they're actually listening, but they're logged in because they use a server.

Okay, yeah, Spoonjabob is another.

Tucker Mike's in there, of course.

Milkman, you're in there.

And Lonesome Loser, the man with the numbers.

And he's already came through with numbers.

I have one, two, three, four already.

He's already confirming them.

Just confirmed we have an old guy

We have a redneck guy

We have a black woman

And then we have a guy

Do you have any numbers from last week that we didn't handle

Do you have any new numbers

Because those numbers are great also man

I haven't added to the list

But I do have last week's numbers still

You do have last week's numbers still

Like the nightclub or whatever

We never did call 2 plus 2

You can call 2 2 Benny's

And some of the other clubs

Moonrakers

Nice nice

Hey I've got

Recluse is asking me

Here

here what the gizmo number is. We don't have a conference set up, but I'm sure you can

set that up if he wants to. Let's get things moving full steam. I'd say in about 20 minutes

we'll try to get Reclude or maybe Zolar or somebody on here. I was talking to Zolar because

I didn't think you were going to be in here at all tonight.

Actually, I apologize about that, but I've had some major PC problems. Microsoft updates

They wiped out my last format, so I had to go back, and I cannot believe it, but restore for XP and save my butt not to get me on air tonight.

So I had to do a reinstall, and then I ghosted this thing.

Well, that sucks for you.

It's no laughing matter.

I really hate it when that kind of shit happens to me.

You know, hey, I want to tell you, you've talked about Windows Vista.

I saw some updates today that came out of Windows Vista,

And it looks like a lot of the things that you heard that were wrong with it, it looks like they may have been addressed and fixed.

Okay, well, I get all the PC mags I subscribe to, PC World, PC Magazine, Computer World, Extreme Tech, and there's another one over here I do.

Anyway, everything I've read, they're like, there's going to be big money for it.

And so far, people I've talked to, they're actually doing a beta test.

I got a copy of a beta test, actually.

They said it's full of bugs.

Whether they actually get it up and running by 2006 by release date, it's hard to say.

Maybe they will because you're looking kind of bad now.

Right.

I'm sorry, when is the release date supposed to be for it?

It's supposed to be 2006.

Okay.

All right.

We'll see if that happens.

Hopefully it does.

It's hard to say.

You know how they get.

There's three major cornerstones to it.

Number one that's in it, it's like a fancy user interface, like graphic user interface.

face it. It's going to look kind of like

a Mac setup. If you ain't never seen

it, you know, it's real

glitzy looking title boxes

and all that crap. You can

flip the menus over and

read on the side of them or read them on the back

and do a bunch of weird goofy crap

like that. But the main thing was supposed

to be WinFS, which is a new whole

new type of file system, which is

a big advance over

NPFS, which is what we

use now. Right, yeah. It used to be

be fat 32 yeah it was the old standard and now ntfs and now yeah okay yeah i mean i can remember

back in the fat days dude oh yeah i actually worked on the original windows you know three

and before 3.1 and even before that yeah word anyway let's stop talking about computers because

you know how people get they got all antsy and stuff so i'm just getting everything 100 a little

bit we'll start prank calls for the night just let the numbers accumulate and if you want to share

by all means

in the chat room

be sure to go ahead

and give me

the

give me any numbers

you have

any ideas you have

for prank calls

by all means

also

madhouselive.com

is the website

for the show

again that's

madhouselive.com

check it out

I just did an update

with the last few episodes

as well as

the prank call

you heard

before

which is a prank call

from last week

I believe

the people in Puerto Rico

that I called

saying they didn't want them to get out of Puerto Rico.

It was called Dick Peterson.

Yeah, and we got some Puerto Ricans for some reason.

It was a pretty good call.

Yeah, so that was interesting.

And also, I'm going to have that bit that Reclude did.

Did I play that?

Yes, I did.

Reclude does a great Latino gangsta-sounding guy.

It's awesome.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

He's good, man.

Bruno Vega.

Bruno Vega, exactly.

I sent him a copy of that for himself so he could use it in his show.

And I'd like to say congratulations to Reclute for a great show.

Dr. Lego and Prank the World that they did also was great.

Man, I apologize.

I missed a whole thing this week with all this crap going on.

My ISP was giving up, and then I was trying to get all these updates and stuff.

So maybe, you know, somehow fill me in or give me a rip of it later.

Yeah, I haven't been streaming anything lately.

I should be, but I'm not.

But that's that.

So congratulations.

To Reclude, Dr. Lego, great shows that they've had.

KDK had a short but good show last night, I think.

He didn't do much.

He did an effort.

Didn't Zolar go on last night also?

I don't know.

I didn't hear it, never hearing.

I believe Zolar went on.

Someone went on last night.

I heard KDK sign, and I stayed on for a while to see if Zolar would come on.

Then I just turned down the volume and went about my business.

Yeah.

And Chainsaw's asking why Zolar comes in and out like that.

I don't know.

He's kind of weird.

He's like a ninja.

long, he has a lot of enemies in the chat room, Chainsaw, that's why, he can't, he can't

stay in one spot, yeah, yeah, he's always on the run, so, that's Zolar, um, anyway,

let me see what else has been going on with me, I don't know, um, yeah, like I said, I'm

alone, I got all the lights off here, it's just really dark and all moody in here, Athena

will be here, like, probably, like, in an hour and a half, two hours or something, she's

at, she's at the stupid haunted house bullshit they got over there in Universal Studios every

year which i've gone every year except for once since they started it in 93 like they take the

universal studios park and then they they shut it down early and at nighttime you they got people

dressed up like you know right like psychos and they have people with fake chainsaws you know like

with no blades on you know they make the noise and everything and they chase you around and they

set up these haunted houses you can go through like five or six of them and they're all like

really expensive haunted you know what i mean they really quality stuff that they put in there

and stuff and people get really drunk commercials for that always wanted to go yeah i heard they're

just awesome ass kicking people told me yeah well this is the first year i i finally don't go

because it sucks it's gotten worse every year gets worse and worse the haunted house i don't

know if this is i've gotten older because i started going when i was like 14 and now i'm 26

so maybe that's what it is i don't know but a lot of people agree with me that it's it's just it

gets packed and it's still too hot here man like today was a cooler day we were getting into what

what they call seasonal, which for us is a high of 89 degrees, so that's like a break

for us, so people are starting to open their windows and shit like that, I'm seeing a lot

of people in the neighborhood opening their windows and stuff.

I've seen some snowbirds, too.

Yeah, well, yeah, I think, yeah, I guess so, yeah, that should be any, but I think they

usually come after November, most of them come after Thanksgiving, they do Thanksgiving

at home, and then they, yeah, well, yeah, they start showing up after they do Thanksgiving,

December 1st they say until like March and shit so let me go back into the chat room oh yeah I'm

trying to say if you want to reach me here on the madhouse if you'd like to get a hold of me

uh you can go as I said before to madhouselive.com click on the listen chat uh link on the top of the

page and you'll be zoomed to the beautiful pages I've made with all the ways to contact me you have

my gmail address there if you'd like to write me uh with any ideas any comments any complaints or

or submit your own prank calls for myself to play,

or I can pass them on to KDK, or Zolar, or Reclude,

or anybody else who's on this show, Billy Mira, can't forget about him, Dr. Lego.

Share it with them so they can also play it on here.

Maybe you'll even, if it's good enough, you'll probably get on the rotation,

and you'll be able to hear yourself maybe sometimes when there's no show on,

which I've done actually this week for the first time.

I heard a few of my calls just on the rotation while I was at work,

and it was pretty cool.

I was like, hey, that's pretty cool.

the new new

Tim Tiercy call

I heard it on

KDK's show

so

yeah

he debuted right here

in that house

I know

yeah exactly

yeah

and that's a great call

that Tom Hanks call

he's a dumbass

that's the best

soundboard call

I've ever heard

exactly

I saw some new

soundboards today

that were up

I forget for who

I think it was

there was a

Celine Dion

freaking out

on CNN soundboard

that I saw today

for the first time

I don't know if

KDK's seen it

but I saw the page

and I bookmarked it

on my browser

at work

and I didn't send it

so I'll probably

I'll check that out

and I'll send it to him tomorrow

just so he can check it out

because he's got tons

and tons of sun boards.

He's a pompous diva too.

Yeah.

Oh yeah.

Well she freaked out on CNN

I think it was about Katrina

or something.

She had a breakdown.

She's a weird

weird bitch.

Yeah.

She's stupid.

Anyway

if you want to reach me

at AOL Instant Messenger

you can do that

at Madhouse Radio.

Yahoo Messenger

is Madhouse

PCU Radio.

Again that's

Madhouse PCU Radio.

aol instant messengers madhouse radio uh msn madhouse pcu radio at hotmail.com and google

talk you can also reach me at madhouse radio uh what else can i say um yeah the email for the

show is madhouse radio at gmail.com um i'm gonna go ahead and also give out the toll-free line if

you like to call in the toll-free line is now open you can reach the show at one triple eight

1-888-278-8509.

Once again, the toll-free number to join the Madhouse tonight.

Free HRs to you and cost me tons of money, so why don't you make me broke?

1-888-278-8509.

It doesn't cost that much money.

You know what I've noticed?

I'm the only person on PCU who pays for his own inbound phone calls.

You know that?

Like, KDK offers this for Zolar, Dr. Lego.

Sean doesn't do any inbound calls, I don't think.

Like, unless you know his personal number, he doesn't have many callers calling in.

But that's how he does it.

But, yeah, I pay for my own calls.

And it's not that expensive.

At least, I don't know.

It hasn't been yet.

It's been billing.

The Call 8 server?

Yeah, well, I mean, well, the Call 8 server?

Yeah, the Call 8 number, yeah.

It's a good deal.

You should look into it for yourself.

You know, I know you have some people in your family who are in jail and stuff.

It's a good way for them to get a hold of you.

You know, they don't have to pay.

We have our first caller.

You know what happened to me last week, right?

Part of the reason why I wasn't here.

Hang on.

Let me get this call right quick, and then we'll deal with that.

All right, my friend?

Yep.

If I can turn off the friggin' ass music.

You're on to Madhouse.

What's up, my brother?

What's up, man?

How you doing?

I'm sorry.

No, no, no.

That's me.

I had a job.

Oh.

I forgot I got to do this switcheroo when I put people on the phone.

So what's up, rec dude?

How you doing, man?

Not bad.

I'm just doing boring computer work, so I need to get some fucking yells out on some

Bastards over the phone

Oh yeah

I'm gonna be just a dirty pervert tonight

Alright

We gotta call a lady

If you're gonna be a dirty pervert

We can call a guy too

They get even worse

Okay

Well I got

Most people don't like gay stuff so

Well you got your choice

You got an old guy

A redneck guy

A black woman

A guy

An old lady

And a guy

Old lady

Easy target

At the home of Dick Dingle

In Pullman, Washington

An old lady answered

Ooh I got a number of a white guy

who lives in puerto rico i'm going to handle that one you know you should call that that's that was

my plan for you but you want to do a perfect call then call the old lady but yeah we do either we

do all of them well here's what i was thinking as i was taking a shit earlier i was thinking that

it would be cool for you to do with your latino voice calling that dude and tell him that he

needs to get out of your country puerto rico because you're puerto rican and you don't need

white people taking our jobs and shit i think that's pretty funny yeah we could do that all

All right, cool, cool, but we have to call Dick Dingle first.

But, unfortunately, guess who's trying to call him right now, tying up the whole thing?

Who?

I'll give you one guess.

Prankmaster.

Yes, he is.

Put him on, brother.

He won't be able to hear you.

Damn it, man.

Call him back.

Look what I'll do.

Let me put him on, and then I'll call you back on the freeway, all right?

Sounds good.

We're going to tell him that you're Dick Dingle, and you're going to prank call him, all right?

How's that sound?

Yeah, do it, brother.

You're on the madhouse.

Bitch.

How the hell am I speaking?

Prankmaster.

Well, you can't hear me over there?

You got a lot of ruckus back there.

Where are you?

Sounds like you're in the den.

Yeah.

You're in the den?

Yeah.

Well, turn on the TV, bro, or step out or something.

I can't hear you.

Hang on.

All right.

Oh, no.

There you go.

All right.

How you doing there, Prankmaster?

Okay.

So, last night, it didn't work out with your mom calling in, huh?

No.

Well, keep pushing, and I'm sure that will work out.

What can I say?

I'm saying at least you know KDK is willing to hear another side of the story, and it

It seems like people may be settling down with this, whatnot, you know.

So just relax, and I'm sure things will be okay.

Yeah, I hope.

Well, don't sound too down.

How about we think about positive things, and we do a prank call right now?

Okay.

How would you like to call Dick Dingle in Washington?

Dick Dingle.

Dick Dingle, an old guy answered there not too long ago.

Dick Dingle.

Would you like to call him?

Sure.

All right.

We're going to do that right now.

Everybody, we have our good friend Prankmaster on the line.

Thank you very much for calling.

and we're going to have him prank call

Dig Dingle live on the air

in just one moment.

We'll be right back on the Madhouse.

Okay.

Okay?

Okay.

You sure it's okay?

Yeah, let's try it again.

Let's try asking.

I don't know.

I need an idea.

Stop everything for prank, man.

Just kidding.

What can you do?

I don't know.

Just come on, man.

You're the prank master.

You're the master of pranks.

You know what?

Not really.

I just go with the flow.

Try to do a survey with him

about his favorite potato chip.

I don't know.

Just make it all creepy or something.

Just get creepy on the guy.

Just get sick.

Do something.

All right.

Well, good luck with that.

Here we go, everybody.

We'll be right back in just a moment.

You're listening to the Madhouse.

It's now 10 p.m. sharp.

Good deal.

Yep, I sent you the numbers.

I got it.

No worry.

I got it.

Thank you.

Hello, this is Dingle Residence.

Hello?

Hello.

Hello, this is Dingle Residence.

Is this Dick Dingle?

Yeah.

What do you want?

I have a question for you.

Yeah?

What is your favorite potato chip?

What is this call about?

Why are you calling me this late at night?

We have created a new product called Dingle Chips,

and it's a combination of Dingle...

Well, you got a speech impediment, boy?

Can you act like you just molested a nine-year-old,

you fucking child-molesting fucking idiot?

You just got fucking owned, you fat bitch!

What do you have to say about that?

Why don't you take your fucking hearing aids out?

Oh, I'm speechless, huh? Go, go, go, go, go. You fucking c-

Hello?

Yeah.

Yeah, what's up? What happened?

Some asshole.

We don't want to deal with assholes, I suppose. That would suck. What else we got? I can call-

No, I think it was somebody from the chat room. It was obviously somebody who listens to TCO.

Oh, man, really? I don't know. I didn't think it was, I don't know, some dick.

But yeah, I suppose it's gonna, I don't know, man. I'm sorry about that. You know, shit happens. You know how it is.

Yeah, who was the number from, anyways?

Anyways, I'm not sure.

Milkman, who is it from?

Milkman got it from somebody.

I don't think he's sure anymore.

Charlie Rogers.

Charlie Rogers, is it?

Yeah, Charlie Rogers.

Yeah, that Charlie Rogers has been in there for a while.

See, you don't know Charlie Rogers.

You haven't been in the chat room for a while.

That's probably what's going on.

Yeah.

Well, do you want to try another?

I got Mr. Vincent Brick here.

Is it from, who's it from?

This one is actually, Milkman, who's this from?

This right here says Parker.

Parker?

Do people have any confirmed or not?

He's still coming through. He's verifying some.

Let me get you with Vincent Prick. Hang on a second.

Hi.

Hey, how you doing?

Hey, what's up Carlito?

Hey, not much. How you doing, Double D?

I'm good. Hey, where's the PM?

Where's Pratt Rancher?

He's on, whatchamacallit, he's on my other line.

But if you hang up, I can connect you with him.

And now I can call you back through the toll-free line and connect you with them

In fact, if you don't have a problem with a phone ringing at your house right now. Hey, can you call my cell phone?

Can you send that to me in the chat room like real quick? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm gonna go

He's gonna send that to me the chat will allow you to talk for one four minutes

Tune in at 29 seconds.

How's that?

Got a 20 at the time.

Yes, this is Vincent Prick.

Hello?

Yes, I have a couple questions for you.

Do you like milk, sir?

Milk?

No, do you like milk?

No, but I'm a prank master like nine-year-old and girls.

What the hell?

You molested a nine-year-old?

He just hung up again.

Now he's calling back in.

Let me get it back on.

Thank you, Zolar, for the impromptu.

You're on the madhouse.

Yeah, are you really trying to get me fucked up around here?

I don't know what the hell's going on with these numbers, man.

Milkman, who's sending that in?

That was Zolar.

I can tell you right now, that was definitely Zolar.

That was Zolar?

Was that Zolar?

He's not in the chat right now.

Okay, well, he's in the chat, but it wasn't from him.

That one was Parker also.

Yeah, Parker.

Zolar is in here as Zolar.

Yeah, Zolar is Zolar.

I had a really good idea for, you know, the prick, but, you know,

And I was going to say, like, you know, do you like milk?

He goes, well, we have a new product called Prick.

It's the milk of a penis, and we've named it Prick.

Prick, it does the body good.

Okay, well, we got one here.

Let me see.

Let me go through a list of names here.

Is it from Peoples?

Because I trust him.

Just go with Peoples.

I can, I've trusted him, you know.

Okay, you got it.

I got, let's see, Mark Jamison, Mark Jamison in Compton, Los Angeles.

Compton, Los Angeles? Compton, yeah.

Was it Compton, L.A.?

Is Compton, L.A. or is Compton, California?

All right, we can try that real quick if you like.

All right, sure.

Okay, so you're doing the milk thing?

Yeah.

You know, we're a big fan of milk on this show.

We have a milkman who works on it.

Hang on, everybody.

We're going to try this third time's a charm.

Just one moment.

All right.

Your current balance will allow hour, 24 minutes, 29 seconds.

Hello?

Yeah.

Is this Mark Jameson?

No.

No, it's D.D.

Who is this?

D.D.

The dead.

Dick?

The dead, you motherfucking pedo.

Hang up, Carlito.

I'll go fuck yourself, you motherfucking pedo.

What's with the language?

You fucking asshole.

Carlito, hang up.

All right, hang up.

You fucking piece of shit.

You fucking dick.

Tell him, Frank, man.

You fucking nine-year-old motherfucker.

The dick, the dick, the dick.

You fucking nine-year-old motherfucker.

The dick, the dick, the dick, the dumb, the dumb, the dick.

I don't fuck yourself, motherfucker.

I'm gonna, I'm motherfucking smarter than you.

Shut up, you dick, you're not.

I'm a fucking nine-year-old sleeping motherfucker.

Hang up, please.

Okay, hang up.

Unless he wasn't from Peepers.

Explain that, Milkman.

What the hell is going on?

I keep getting all these numbers.

You got that from the dead, didn't you?

Okay, well, that makes more sense.

He just gave you his own number.

That's probably what it was, then, you know.

He just gave me his own number.

I figured he'd have a good number.

You should actually give that out onto, like, the air and, like, actually, you know.

Well, I'll speak with him, I'll speak with him, and I'll get him straightened out.

He's young, you know, he doesn't know, I don't know, he just, you know.

Hang on, I got a Bruno Vega here in Puerto Rico, in Vieques, Puerto Rico,

which is that island where they had that base that they kicked out, the Americans out.

You want to try calling him?

Who's the from?

Bruno Vega, it's actually from, this should be from Lonesome.

Is it from Lonesome?

Yeah, yeah, Bruno Vega, Beverly Hills, Guaynabo, Puerto Rico.

Bruno Vega, okay.

Bruno, all right, hang on everybody, we'll be right back with Bruno Vega in just one moment.

Are you there?

Yeah.

All right, Brunovig.

Four times the count.

Yes.

Is it Brunovig?

Yes.

Brunovig.

What do you want?

Yes, have you heard of the new product called Prick?

What did you say?

Have you heard of the new product called Prick?

I don't understand you.

Will you speak clearly, please?

Have you heard of the new product called Prick?

No, have you heard of Chastity Best for a fucking nine-year-old, you fucking child molesting son of a bitch?

You fucking son of a bitch, you charmalistic motherfucker, you a piece of shit, man.

Why you fucking not in jail, you son of a bitch?

You hang up the phone, hang up the phone, little baby.

Yeah, you conditioned up by your contact, you fucking cockroaches, cocksuckers, you

motherfucking piece of shit.

Are you finished yet?

I'm going to put a dick right in your mouth, you fucking little faggot.

I told you to stretch it four calls in a row I couldn't help it dude I couldn't help it

I can't believe that my fans would do this to me and to you you know what I mean I had more

faith in the fans of the madhouse I feel like quitting right now I'm not doing the show ever

ever again this is so horrible that what they're doing to my show my show my own fans would give

me numbers like this you know they're giving you their own phone number and you know i i feel

betrayed i feel like you know it's like pearl harbor all over again now look i got this one

here that milkman himself has confirmed apparently um got a virginia byron virginia byron mountain

view california all right let's go ahead and try that right now we'll give this one more shot

Hopefully everything's working. I have milkman's assurances. Give me a second. Hang on everybody. We're gonna try this again

We'll be right back. It's just Virginia and love

Carlito, it's Zola.

He knew my fucking girlfriend. He's a nine-year-old.

It's a different phone number. He's using my cell phone on my friend.

Zola, how could you do this?

You're hurting me. This is Zan. I'm trying to, you know.

You know, I had to put my friend's phone number in your fucking instant messenger to fool you and shit.

I suppose. I don't know. Me and you are going to have a talk, Zola.

I got the nine-year-old girl coming in tomorrow, and she's going to be on my show.

So everybody tune in to Zola Vision at 10 p.m.

And we'll spin now 12-year-old.

No, she's 12 now, she says.

Yeah, and we'll have her on the show tomorrow.

Good deal, man.

Good deal.

You know what I say.

If there's grass in the field, you can play ball.

If it's good enough to bleed, it's good enough for me.

Don't say that one.

Don't say pee old enough for me.

All right, Frank Baxter, give your hands up the nine-year-olds.

You little fucking pudgy fucking baby gorilla bastard mongoloid.

Oh, my God.

Go fuck yourself.

Oh.

Oh, and by the way,

very nice,

there's numbers coming over tomorrow.

It's tripped for us.

180 bucks I gotta pay you, though.

180?

Seriously, so dark.

Go fuck yourself.

Listen, bring your father over here

so I can flop that fat fuck, too.

Seriously, kid.

Go fucking fuck yourself, dude.

You have no life.

Hey, listen.

Sue me, okay?

I love you.

What are you doing?

Make me famous.

I love...

I'll sue you for the harassment.

Hey, listen.

When you lose all that weight,

can I buy the skin

that's gonna be half your body?

That fat...

That flab?

It's going to be my third.

He probably must have had his stomach stapled, you know.

Did you hear about that, Carlito?

I've thought about doing it myself, but I sound like surgery.

Yep, yep.

He's got big stitches across the bottom of his stomach like a C-section

when they take a baby out of a uterine.

Really?

That's it, man.

So what are you going to do to that loose, frabby skin that's hanging off your body when you lose weight?

You have to have some tattoo letters to sit on it.

You just cut the skin off, you narrow it to a board, and you practice on it?

Save.

All I have to say is to all of you listening, all of you in the chat room,

how dare you?

How dare you hurt this guy's feelings like this?

Maybe you have some fans out there on Carlito's, you know, show.

Maybe you should give out your phone number again.

Sad state of society, I think.

I think we're going to call it a night here.

That's it.

Thank you very much for listening.

Stay on the air, and I won't bother you no more, Carlito.

I'll just listen and stuff.

No, no, Zola, me and you will talk.

Me and you, that's all I've got to say.

Me and you will talk.

Hey, I'm not...

Hang on, Rester, keep your hands to yourself.

Put them in your pockets, and when that loose, flabby skin is hanging off your body,

donate it to sucking victims out there from burn units that need that skin you got hanging off your body.

I want you to go back to your show.

The show's over.

Thank you, Zola.

And he laughs like that.

Frank messed up.

I don't know.

I just...

No, I kind of knew it was him, like, from the beginning, because I could tell how he...

Like, when he sounds like a girl, you can kind of tell it's a guy.

You know, because it's like, um, hello?

Yeah.

Yeah, that's very good.

I'm going to go.

I'm going to call KDK now.

I've got to discuss some stuff with him and see what I'm going to do.

Make some parent phone calls.

I've been talking to Ted and everything, and I think I might talk to him.

That's it.

Yeah.

Thank you very much for calling, Frank.

All right, dude.

You know, tell Ted that I said hey.

Tell Teddy K I said hey.

Okay.

Everybody, I'm not canceling the Madhouse.

I'm not going to have a talk with Zolar.

I'm not pissed off at anybody on the air, anybody listening.

I should say anybody who contributed.

That was all great.

Satan's in there.

Satan's saying he's too stupid to know Carlito's doing it on purpose.

You know, I don't know.

Seriously, this is great.

But I feel bad now.

Now, if Athena was here, I would not be doing this because she would be telling me not to.

Oh, my God.

So that was that, everybody.

Wow.

That's insane.

Hey, Milkman, I can barely hear you, Milkman.

Applause.

Yay.

There you go.

Applause, yes.

Applause.

I'm so good with this shit tonight.

DTT tells me, Carlito, don't be nice.

That's what he says.

He's like, fuck that.

Don't be nice, man.

So props.

Who just participated?

That was great.

And I had more people that wanted to get in that, right?

I know Brandon Vegas was telling me, but I couldn't spread it out any longer.

It was just too much torture for that guy, but that was great.

Zolar, Reclude the Dead also contributed.

And to everybody else who wanted to get on that, maybe we could do that some other time.

Brandon Vegas, yeah, from Charlie Rogers.

Brandon Vegas is taking blame for being Charlie Rogers.

That was great.

After the asshat incident, now he's getting the Charlie Rogers bust.

And the greatest thing is I told him what?

I'm going to have a talk with Zolar is what I told Zolar.

I'm going to have a talk with you.

Like, I got beef now, man.

We're going to talk like men or something, man.

I hope Zolar understands that was just a joke.

He's a smart guy when it comes to things like that.

Yeah, he is.

He even played the whole thing out.

I sent him a number from my friend's cell phone.

Yeah, and no, I'm not going to be moving the madhouse to PCU.

I don't even talk to Ted.

I've had, like, maybe one or two conversations with him online when he used to be online.

Hey, we in TCU, baby.

Yeah, this is TCU.

That was for everybody here.

I'm not moving anywhere.

I love TCU.

I love everybody here, and I love KDK.

No, it was a prank just to keep the thing looking real.

Yeah, we had to keep it a theater of the mind.

We had to keep prankmasters on our side because, I don't know,

it's just the thing to do.

I don't know.

It's a different avenue.

Hey, but you know what?

If I had taken a different attitude all this time,

we would not have been able to have done that right now.

That was great.

No, it would have been over with.

Yeah, it would have been.

So I think I'm definitely going to be passing that on to everybody.

Everybody, I'm going to have to make a copy of that tonight and listen to it because that was awesome.

Oh, that's going to be a classic.

Yeah, that was a classic.

That was a classic.

It's a gangbang.

Most definitely, man.

Bruno Vega even got in on that.

That's crazy.

Oh, my God.

He did Rick Lude, too, with that.

That was so awesome.

And I act all confused.

I'm like, huh?

What's going on?

What?

Like I can't hang up.

Oh, Jesus.

Pushing the button.

Yeah, exactly.

Beep, beep, beep.

That's going to solve your problems right there for sure.

Start beeping buttons.

Oh, man.

So what else can we do now, Milkman?

Dude, I sent you a whole bunch on Google Talk of clubs here.

If you're interested in any of those, there's always somebody there.

Yeah, okay.

The problem is that they're loud, but let me pull those up.

Hang on.

Because I saw you sent me the Tutu Benny restaurant, which I've called before.

Yeah.

I was that girl who kind of, I think she kind of dug me or something.

Yeah, yeah, that's right.

Right, you were telling her about your scratch-off tickets and stuff.

Yeah, that I didn't get scratch-off, I don't know.

Yeah.

That was weird.

Yeah, Weedman wanted to get on that too, huh?

I'm seeing now.

He wanted us to call him as a stoner residence, unfortunately.

Well, he's in Canada too, and I don't think I can call Canada.

Well, I could, but it would probably take up all that phone card all it's left.

I don't think it's, I think it's still local, uh, local violence.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, well, look at that.

I didn't know.

See, I never called Canada.

Uh-oh, Prankmaster's busting me now.

Let me see what's going on.

Oh, see, he thinks that you were giving me, because I told him, just tell him you get

the numbers and you give them to me, that's all you do, tell him, you know, I mean, that's

your job right there.

Calls (5, 11 min of 44 min)

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